Would this piss you off? DP comment on day out

[JadeJ91]

Day out yesterday, historical seaside town with various lovely view points. DP a bit grumpy all day and not paying a lot of interest to anything. Anyway, at one particular location I asked him what he thought of the view and he said ‘not great really….hang on, it’s just got a lot better now’ just as an attractive woman walked past, and he joked about her bum being the highlight of his day so far.

A bit disrespectful, surely? I told him to shut up and he said I should lighten up and ‘have a laugh’

He has no respect for you

It’s not just the one comment though, really. I’m pretty sure the sort of bloke who would make a comment like this overall isn’t the sort of bloke I’d like to spend my life with.
People can end relationships for any reason.

It’s not something that would particularly bother me as I’d take it as an attempt at a joke albeit ill judged and a bit cringey. I’d have just replied haha very funny. Let’s be honest we all look at the menu so to speak. Those saying it’s disrespectful etc can you honestly say you’ve never looked at a man and thought he’s attractive.

I think lots of people are attractive. I don’t make lewd comments about them to my partner though.

It was a throwaway comment , why would it bother you ?

Blimey! The guillotine is out!
I am not so sure who is hysterical here?!

That’s a bit hard in OP. People don’t always reveal this side until they stop caring what their OH thinks

I have zero issues with looking at the menu.
Loud reading of the beauty of other restaurants dishes pics, while being in my own restaurant, having enjoyed my food, bothers me a tad.

I’d honestly have gone home on my own at this point. Moody leery teenager.

Dear god, I hope you don't have children to pass this kind of misogyny on to.

Imagine what he's like when your not around.

So if women dress up or want to look good, they are only doing it for men and should just put up and shut up if a man comments on their body or another woman's body?

Wow.

There's a lot of societal pressure on women to stick with a relationship and work on it and have a man and all.

So I think it's nice that if you come to Mumsnet you'll get reminded that actually you don't have to spend your one precious life with a prick (and I'm not calling your partner that, OP, it's your call to make)

Also... There weren't any hangings at the guillotine.

Thinking that someone is attractive is very different than actually making a comment about it. Not to mention saying it's the highlight of your day when you've spent it with your actual partner.

Because a lot of the time they only start to act like this after a year or two (or 16 in the case of my ex H) or whenever they've got their feet under the table. Etc etc.

Agree.
more importantly why was he so bored?
maybe he doesn’t like historical seaside towns …. Not everyone does.
Maybe he had just gone to please the op.

In which case he could have used his grown up words and said ‘I don’t fancy going there’, rather than going and then behaving like a petulant child.

DP said he was happy with where we went prior to the trip - we had visited somewhere similar at his suggestion last summer so very much jointly chosen.

He was just in a mood, for reasons I don’t know - he just gets like that sometimes.

Obviously is disrespectful and unfunny... but on the other hand surely either you tolerate his knobbishness, or you don't?

Also, whose idea was it to go to the historical seaside town? Did he want to go? Did you force him to go? Does he ever want to spend time with you? If he does is it always on his terms?

I hate it when ppl get in a mood and ruin a beautiful day. Has he really never made similar comments about women before this? How long have you been together?

What percentage of men are not like that?

And at what stage of the relationship they actually show you that’s who they are?

This in absolute bucket loads. So often in real life, men's behaviour is minimised and excused and tolerated. It's so refreshing to hear the opposite on mumsnet.

Sorry, I have no idea what you are on about! Several people have agreed with me, so your comment is falling on deaf ears.

Grumpy Prat is telling you to lighten up????

He wanted to piss you off!

Lots of people feel moody at times but what a respectful, emotionally mature person does is get themselves out of it or bow out of the trip. Not leer over strangers and make their partner feel miserable and disrespected.