AIBU- pulling someone up on snarky comments.

[Guttyyyyyyyyy]

So I work and DH is retired. We have a dog. I work 4 days a week . On the days I work DH walks the dog in the morning and I walk it in the evening. My days off we swap it around.
There is a group of dog walkers that meet in the morning. One man thinks its hilarious to ask if Ive enjoyed my sleep in/ lazy day/ sending DH out while I relax ect.
every single time I see him. 2 years of me just ignoring him / saying I work ect.
I work in a unit that deals with palliative care. Yesterday was a bloody hard day.
So this morning he said it must be nice to laze about on a Sunday and send DH out so I let him have it with both barrels - told him ( in rough terms) what my day consisted of. That I was up and out by 6am. Long drive. The realities of my job.
He was silent. Got home and his wife has watsapped to say Ive upset him !@@.
AIBU to think he deserves it.

My god, his wife contacted you? Says everything you need to know right there. I mean I guess a better way would have been to say something like, oh these walks with the dog are like an oasis of peace and quiet after my longs days at work...Nigel (he sounds like a Nigel, no offense against anyone called Nigel), yes my LONG DAYS AT WORK NIGEL. But your way was good too.

I was tempted, but my friends comment has been liked by nearly every other group member so Im happy to just let it stand.

Has the Wife replied Op?

He absolutely deserved it. And good for you.

This. Do not leave it there - you've started, finish the job

Seriously though, these fucking men who think they're entitled to comment on anything.

He deserved it. Twerp.

😂

No reply.

Tough shit. Tell her he’s be n upsetting you every week. He can give it out but can obviously not take it.
And why’s his wife contacting you like he’s the King?!

She really didn't. She told him she goes out to work i.e. when DH walks the dog she is at work. He should have stopped. Some people think this behaviour is funny/waggish/just a joke, but it can be really upsetting - OP clearly upset, esp when she works in a palliative care unit (you know what that means, I take it - what her days often include?)

Agreed.
Although, where I live it's more like Big Jim with the Shi-Tzu and Angela with the Rottweiler...and the women with the bigger dogs are the ones that get more shit from blokes. Trust me on that one.

It's incredible the number of people who come out with that line, though.

I've always assumed they are men.

Always the ‘be kind’ types that are the crappiest people. Don’t be gaslit by his wife (this is normal for her!)

You did right. Let them run around in circles at the audacity of someone calling him on his bullying disguised as humour!

She probably knows her DH is a twunt and therefore can’t defend his actions anymore.

No, the sexist pain does it to OP's friend, but not to the friend's DH (or any other man i.e. provably sexist).

I anyone you’ve seen the last of them.

And I’m sure that’s very much to the glee of the rest of the group.

You’re completely in the right OP and why is his wife fighting his battles? That’s weird.

I feel your pain, OP. YANBU. And well done you for calling him out on it. His wife will likely have no idea about the jibes he makes.
About 20 odd years ago now, maybe longer, a patient (far too well to be in the ICU they were lounging in) giving a constant narration to anyone who could be bothered listening about my, apparent, heart and kidney problems….in that I was “heart lazy & kidney be bothered”. What he didn’t know was that I’d been called to theatre to help out because the woman who had been in the bed opposite him was exanguinating on the operating table, it was an absolute blood bath and she died the most horrible death. Didn’t even recognise that when I returned, I was showered and in hospital scrubs because my clothes were essentially binned. He didn’t even clock on to the fact that she never returned. Horrible, horrible man and it still upsets me now. I wish I’d said something.

Tell tale sign she, and everyone else in the WhatsApp group, know very well that her husband is the arse here and you were well within your right to (finally) put him in his place

I think if anything you’ve underreacted. I’d have cracked ages ago! Another man who’s too lazy to come up with any real humour so resorts to sexist ‘jokes’. Also it’s clear he thinks that women should do everything and it’s outrageous to ask a man to ever be inconvenienced in even the most minor way.

Given that OP says her DH is supportive and thinks this man is an arsehole, why would you think he would engage in ‘bants’ with him berating his wife when he knows she’s out at six and working a stressful and distressing job ? Or did you miss what this man is saying to other women in the group - namely repeatedly asking if SiL of one of the women is a ladyboy because she’s from Thailand ?

Not everyone’s DH is an arsehole and if you actually believe what you’ve posted here I feel very sorry for you because you must have been the victim of so much misogynistic bullshit that now you think it’s everyone’s experience. Sad.

I’d point out that #BeKind should work both ways!

He's truly vile. Your poor friend having to tolerate such racist abuse.

That is shocking.
I would refuse to be in such company.
Time to make other walking plans I think.
Life is too short.

That remark to your friend should be passed around as your reason for no longer attending.

I wonder if he's the same man who knew my husband in passing and, when our DS was little, would comment "Is he babysitting?" every time I walked in the pub (I went once a fortnight for 3 hours to have a bit of a laugh and karoke when it fit in my DH's shift pattern). One night I mentioned it when I got home and, the next time DH saw him, he said "Are you not going to ask if Hooble's babysitting or do you think they forgot to cut the cord?"

Poor diddums has hurty feelings. Good, what an unfunny twonk! Good for you OP!