Neighbour having an affair - do I report my suspicions?

[AmzJS]

We live next to a couple - lady is probably mid/late 30’s, the man in his 40’s. They don’t have children.

Both are pleasant, and the man does shift work - one week a month he leaves early evening and works into the following day (we often hear his car pull up in the early hours).

DH and I have both noticed over recent months that a couple of times a week when her partner is on lates, the lady will be picked up by a car (the same one) around 6.30/7pm (she doesn’t drive) and not return until closer to midnight - the car will usually linger outside with the engine running as they are in it chatting.

With the lighter evenings, we’ve noticed that on these occasions she is always ‘done up’ in make up and wearing flattering outfits - tight dresses, heels etc. On one occasion, my DH was out the front and he said there was an over bearing smell of perfume. She rarely appears like this at any other time when her partner is home.

She has gone out again tonight and we’ve noticed her - again the same car, and her all dressed up.

We are convinced she is having an affair, it has all the hallmarks and it’s too much of a coincidence to only be when her partner is working lates.

I feel like morally, I should say something - but I don’t want to put my foot in it. Would anyone have ideas on how to approach this?

No

Behave

Fucking hell, I bet you loved the Covid lockdowns.

Don't be so ridiculous. You can't go accusing her of having an affair when you've no proof.

Maybe she has an evening job in a pub. Maybe she's going to a hobby for the evening

Maybe you need to wind your neck in and mind your own business.

That's the thing. You know nothing. Keep your nose to yourself and find something useful to do that's not curtain twitching.

People like you are poisonous.

You really dont know that do you. She could be working a bar job in the evenings for her cousin who picks her up for all you know.
Maybe you should break into her house and bug her handbag, then you'd know for sure.

How do you know it's nothing to do with work? She might have a second job to fill the evenings when her DH is at work and needs to dress smartly for it. The person giving her a lift could be a colleague. Or he could be her lover. The point is, you can't say for sure but if you're wrong and you tell them, it will massively blow up in your face.

I don't know either 🤷‍♀️. And that's the point: there could be many explanations to this. What if you talk to the husband and he says "Yeah, that's her brother taking her out." How will your relationship to your neighbours survive that? Or worse: you tell him and he commits suicide- can you live with that? You don't know these people so you can't barge in and accuse someone of cheating when you don't have any facts.

Bloody hell OP - don’t try to disguise your misplaced nosiness with altruism & moral concern for a potential unborn child FFS!! Even your excuse highlights just how unbelievably nosy you are - as though it’s any of your business or concern whether or not they may choose to have a family or not.

I’d truly hate to have a neighbour like you. How dare your neighbour go out & dress accordingly. Surprised you haven’t discovered the name of her perfume given how close you’ve got to smell & judge how “overpowering” it is.

Any other judgements you’d like to share about them? Unbelievable.

It's quite sad that you are jumping to these conclusions due to her having make up on or dressing nicely. Maybe she does that for herself, to feel good.

Even if you actually had proof of an affair this would be outrageous busybody behaviour- and you don’t even have that!

how to approach it?
Stop fantasising obsessively about your neighbours and get a life.

Why don't you just phone The Sun? They'll be all over it and we can find out what is going on.

Why you absolutely busy body.

Get a life!

So what in understanding here is that you're a busybody with no life, therefore anyone WITH a life is automatically having an affair.

None of your business, close your curtains and find something meaningful to occupy your time. Jesus.

Are you on glue?!

Can’t believe you’re considering telling this guy that his wife is going out when he’s working overnight. So what. You have zero proof of anything, including whether it’s an open marriage. Just because she likes to look and smell nice doesn’t mean she is automatically having an affair. Stay well out of it is my advice as it’s not actually any of your business.

Don't report anything just yet.

Make a comprehensive diary off all of her movements, what she's wearing, a rough guess of how much, and what type of perfume she's wearing too.

Do you have a friend in the police who can run a check on the numberplate?

If you're going to be nosy and gossipy, you would be as well going all in.

Definitely not worth getting involved.
The only situation in which it's worth saying something is if one of the pair is a close friend or relative and then only if you are sure, and also sure there's no abuse in the existing partnership.

Honestly I would stay out of it…anyway The truth always comes out in the end don’t be the ones to stir the pot, if it’s what your suspecting I’m sure he will find out for him self sooner or later, also saves you from the drama of it all

You don’t even know these people! Keep your sticky beak out of other people’s business.

Oh my god stop curtain twitching you nosy mare.

Go and get laid or something, get out of other people's relationships. "Report your suspicions" give me strength.

This is half the plot to a Midsomers Murders.

Close your curtains

First of all, you literally have no idea what she is doing you are just speculating. Second of all, you need to get a life.