Neighbour having an affair - do I report my suspicions?

[AmzJS]

We live next to a couple - lady is probably mid/late 30’s, the man in his 40’s. They don’t have children.

Both are pleasant, and the man does shift work - one week a month he leaves early evening and works into the following day (we often hear his car pull up in the early hours).

DH and I have both noticed over recent months that a couple of times a week when her partner is on lates, the lady will be picked up by a car (the same one) around 6.30/7pm (she doesn’t drive) and not return until closer to midnight - the car will usually linger outside with the engine running as they are in it chatting.

With the lighter evenings, we’ve noticed that on these occasions she is always ‘done up’ in make up and wearing flattering outfits - tight dresses, heels etc. On one occasion, my DH was out the front and he said there was an over bearing smell of perfume. She rarely appears like this at any other time when her partner is home.

She has gone out again tonight and we’ve noticed her - again the same car, and her all dressed up.

We are convinced she is having an affair, it has all the hallmarks and it’s too much of a coincidence to only be when her partner is working lates.

I feel like morally, I should say something - but I don’t want to put my foot in it. Would anyone have ideas on how to approach this?

Yabu. It's best for you to keep your nose out. You don't actually know if she's having an affair and if she was? It has nothing to do with you, as much as it's morally wrong for her to do it isn't your business and doesn't affect your life whatsoever.

It’s absolutely none of your business. Don’t be such a nosy parker

Oh god,I lived next to your type many moons ago

They saw a bloke coming and going-sometimes on foot and sometimes on a motorbike

They decided i was shagging him and almost fell over themselves to go running back to my abusive ex to tell him I was shagging some bloke and had been for a while (while I was still with abusive ex)

My poor father was very angry when he found out

It had been him on foot and on his motorbike-hed pick me up to give me a lift somewhere or drop something off/pick bits up for me on foot

The shit that caused-my ex was capable of killing me-i was very lucky to get out alive

As it was,he made so much trouble for me,the harassment was off the scale-he's calmed down a bit now but would flare up given half a chance (he's only stopped because of my now dp)

They just gave him the ammunition while they got to sit back smirking that they'd helped him and 'did the right thing'

Keep your nose out and don't go shitstirring even if you have concrete proof

It's none of your business

That poor woman has no idea the nosey twats next door are watching her every move

Absolutely not. You sound like a nightmare nutter neighbour

Omg mind your own business it's nothing to do with you for one you don't know she is having an affair and even if she was you don't know their situation how their marriage is it could be an open marriage for all you know!

YABU. MYOB.

Don't get over involved with neighbour.

Keep your nose out of the curtains Snoopy.

What would you say - we see your wife dressing all fancy and reeking of perfume so she must be having it off with the milkman

Go about your life and leave others to theirs

What do you know though? That when he works nights, instead of sitting in her house on her own she goes out? You have no proof of anything. You have no idea where she is going or what she is doing, its all speculation.

Leave well alone. It is nothing to do with you!

Please get a hobby @AmzJS
Messing in others business when you have only your own vivid imagination as proof will only give you aggravation, and potentially ruin a marriage

Our nosey neighbour did this, she reported to my husband after a few weeks of ‘monitoring her’ (meaning me) that I was having an affair. Her reasoning was that everyday dh left in our car for work and then at lunchtime a ‘man in a van’ arrives, goes into the house, stays around 45mins and then leaves. She wanted to let him know as it ‘wasn’t fair him working so hard’ while I’m ‘doing that’ every day.

What she told dh was absolutely true, a man in a van did arrive each lunchtime, stay for around 45 minutes and leave.

The man was in fact dh who drove to work in our family car each day, picked up the van from his work and when his work route changed to a local route, he was able to come home to have his lunch with me and our little boy. It was a really lovely change for the few months he was on the new route.

Dh found it funny but I was pissed off, she also made comments about how much shopping I brought home and how much money we must have etc which was hilarious because we were bloody skint. It felt so intrusive and I felt ‘watched’ a lot after that, I never said hello to her again or answered her questions about ds and she eventually got the message and stopped trying to talk to me.
She tried to blame it on her worsening vision as she was getting older that she didn’t recognise it was dh 🙄

In other words, mind your own business. You have absolutely no idea what she’s doing, where she’s going or who with. Maybe she goes on a fantastic night out with friends on the occasions her dh works away but when he’s home they spend all their time together which involves no fancy nights out getting dressed up.

This happened to my friends partner( with his ex). A year after they broke up the neighbour told him that they knew it had been going on for a long time for similar ish reasons. He was crushed that people knew what was going on and he was the last to know, so I have seen the other side of it. I’d say stay out of it and if it just so happens to be true, never confirm that you had any suspicions.

Why do you keep updating the thread with your mindless assumptions? Have you missed the 100 comments telling you that your behaviour is out of line? Really, people like you are dreadful. Stop.

Same post as this not that long ago. The comments were 🤣🤣

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If this is real, find something else to occupy you op. A marriage is no-one else's business. Keep out of it nosey sod.

Good grief, I thought curtain twitchers like you lost their place in society decades ago. Mind your own business.

For all you know they could Be swingers or have an open and free relationship. She could be an Escort. There are many possibilities.
Even if she is having an affair I wouldn't say anything I wouldn't want to live with causing the fall out. As a PP said supposing her DH beats her up or worse because you couldn't keep your snout out.
See nothing hear nothing say nothing!

Morally, you should butt out as you know nothing and clearly need a life of your own.

Selfishly, please do “report your suspicions” and then report back about how that went down. It’s all the drama, I just love it.

Even if you’re right and she is having an affair it’s cock all to do with you. Christ I’m glad you’re not my neighbour!!

You keep your nosey-curtain-twitching-beak out of other people’s business.

They are not your family. They are not your close friends. You owe them nothing.

You have no idea what their circumstances, hobbies, jobs, arrangements are.

Get. A. Hobby.

Well first off alert the church elders… a woman wearing perfume?? Can only mean one thing! I’ll get the scarlet letter ready.

There is absolutely no way you know that he is a pleasant man, you have no idea what he is really like or what their relationship is like once their door is closed. He might be the one shagging the receptionist or the MD at his work during the night shift. Leave well alone and OP you need to find something else to do of an evening. Google Netflix shows and find something interesting to watch!

OMG, Imagine living next door to the OP… 🙄

None of your business.