To ask what’s the most ridiculous injury you’ve given yourself?

[Fallinleaves]

I’ll start… 3 days ago I took a chunk out of my thumb whilst putting my socks on because I had a really rough toenail I hadn’t noticed. It’s like a paper cut but worse! Still hurts, still stings with everything that touches it 3 days on 😭. Please make me feel better….

Drying a large metal baking tray held in left hand and rubbing vigorously with tea towel in right hand; right hand slipped off its edge and baking tray smacked me square in the face. Classic slapstick.

This one?

I knocked a carving knife off the cutlery tray in my dishwasher and it embedded itself in the top of my foot

I slo mo slid off my parent’s bed in a nylon 1970s sleeping bag (with my arms trapped) head first whilst watching top of the pops. Carpet burn on my chin. (Parents were watching Emmerdale Farm in the lounge).

Avocado hand. 5hr operation to reattach nerve in my ring finger.

😂 sorry

I slashed my eye jelly in half nearly down to the cornea with a phormium leaf. RIP my eye sight in that eye 👁️

But apparently you only need one good eye to drive so good news there.

I hope you’re okay now, but that really made me laugh!

Not me, but my sister was holding a knife in the kitchen, lost her balance and managed to land her bum cheek on said knife. It wasn't too bad an injury but that was very scary!

My granny was a physio and she always said that putting socks/trousers/tights on standing up is one of the most injury-causing activities.

I don’t put sharp knives in the dishwasher, especially not after the case of the woman who tripped and impaled herself on one.

www.theguardian.com/uk/2003/may/29/kirstyscott

Broken my toe in the 90s by dropping a huge jar of Dolmio on it, while attempting to make pasta for me and my friends whilst pissed.

Was rewrapping my kitchen cupboards in lockdown, tried to get one of the wraps off but it was really stuck down! I pulled it so hard I pulled back, punched myself in the eye, gave myself a concusion and split my eyelid open

I'm quite accident prone and stapled my finger with a staple gun as I was making a display in my classroom. I nearly fainted but managed to remove the embedded staple from my finger. It hurt like hell .

I seriously injured my back to the point I couldn’t walk for 3 weeks due to bending over to take a cake out of a cupboard in the staff room at work whilst wearing high heels. That was many years ago and it was so embarrassing as they put me in a swivel office chair to push me down the road to the doctors to get checked over 😳😂

That is one of my intrusive thought nightmares.

I cut my hand with my new knives ... whilst I was specifically admiring the fact I had new sharp knives.

I walked into a man carrying chop sticks in Hong Kong and bruised my arm 🤣

We could be here a while

slipped running on carpet (shiny tights were in fashion!), split my chin open on a door handle

burnt my hand and arm dropping liquid caramel on it

smashed my nose several times doing up a girth as apparently I don’t learn

broke my ankle and foot walking downstairs

broke the other ankle and foot getting out of bed

injured my back so badly doing nothing I needed emergency spinal surgery

stabbed through my hand separating frozen burgers

That and American sink waste disposal units.

Lying down to paint the skirting board in DS's new flat, wriggling along the floor as I went, and broke my toe whacking it against the adjacent wall as I hadn't realised I'd gone that far. DH and DS just laughed. They didn't believe me until my toe turned black next day. It still has a kink in it.

Also broke my big toe going down a water slide with DC when they were little. It still clicks.

I tore my rotator cuff changing the bed sheets

Just yesterday my wheelie bin had blown over. I stood it back up, on a raised part of my garden and bent down to start picking up the bits that had spilled out. An unexpected gust of wind came, and sent the bin flying across the garden and into me. My arm is heavily bruised, have a bump on my head and my neck is bloody sore and stiff. Fml 😭😂

That is so Final Destination!

I think you win 😂