To now allow DSs friend over because of pillow fight?

[CrabbyPaty]

I don’t mind the kids playing with their pillows as I know a lot of their games involve the pillows - pillow fight, gladiators, paintballing etc but the rule is no stomper pillow. That’s it.

Last night they were playing upstairs when I heard crying, went up and DS1 had a bloodied nose, DS2 had whacked him in the face with a stomper pillow. He’s meant to be having a friend over tonight and I’m thinking of cancelling. DH said to just remove the stompers but I feel that is just masking DSs behaviour. Would I be going too far to cancel the sleepover?

Pfft, kids fight. Occasionally it goes a bit far and someone gets a nosebleed or something. That's how they learn, to be honest.

Half American reporting in. Stopper Pillow. It's what you lot call a draught excluder. It's for floors.

You're welcome.

No clearer.
I would say though that if something is going to be called "stomper" then someone is likely to hit someone with it.

That’s Stopper. OP was talking about Stomper.

You’re Welcome.

I never allowed pillow fights/jumping on beds, etc, wrecking furniture.

I'd never have used a hard pillow as a base for soft pillows.

I wouldn’t punish the children for poor parenting.

No, she said STOMPER and they go on beds apparently

Is like a pouffe? Like a foot rest type thing but with padding?
Just take it away from them. Tell them if they try and find it and mess about with it again then they will be banned from sleepovers. At least temporarily.

Well well, Mumsnet is so educational, stompers are a new one on me.
Oh, about your original question. Take away the stompers and tell the DC to be more careful in future. It's not fair to cancel plans with another family unless you really have to.

Just get rid of the stupid pillows🤷‍♂️

I had a friend whose parents did that. When I was about 8/9 I remember waiting at the window for her to arrive and then when it past the time she was due they called to say she wasn’t coming as she was being punished for something . I cried the rest of the day. I can remember it like yesterday as I was really looking forward to it.

Ooh, thank you, there's one in my garden I'll be able to use.

Honestly just get rid of the shit sounding pillows.

I really don’t understand people who put things like this around their kids and then create “rules” which are very obviously going to be broken. It’s like putting a fountain in a park which looks almost exactly like a paddling pool and then putting signs all around it to stop kids paddling in it, just like torture. Having pillow fights but only with specific pillows ON THE SAME BED as the ones you’re allowed to use is just asking for trouble.

I need a stomper pillow explanation, are they used in certain countries op? Or is it an old fashioned British thing I’ve never heard of?

I wouldn’t cancel the sleepover as it impacts other people, I’d think of something that will only negatively impact ds who caused the nosebleed if you’re sure it wasn’t an accident

In my mother's American voice they sound quite similar!

The Pillows of Peril...

Kiwi here - never heard of them in NZ. Mind you, Aussies call a duvet a doona. Go figure!
Any other nations able to report? This is like the Eurovision results 😝

I think the harder pillows are to stop up the gap between mattress and wall or headboard. They wedge there and then fluffy pillows propped in front. Again sometimes called stopper pillows. Maybe OP misheard MIL and it's stuck?

Oh, and don’t cancel the friend coming over.

Get rid of the pointless things and the stomper issue is over forever.

Don't cancel on the poor child that is excited to be coming round to play.

Yes but the question isn't "what is a stomper pillow" - it isn't anything. It's something the OP or whoever told her has misunderstood and misheard. Nobody but them has ever used the word.
The question is "where did the OP get this from" and this, if true, seems a fairly likely explanation for what that thing the OP misheard might be.

Thank you! I believed I was providing Stateside 'wisdom' as a nationality not yet invoked.

Yes I think your explanation makes the most sense!

Just get rid of the stomper pillows permanently.

You can't really expect kids involved in a pillow fight to work out which ones are stomper pillows and therefore forbidden and which ones are ok.

Get rid of the pillows. It’s not fair on the other child to have the sleepover cancelled YABU.

Same here!