To be in a different room to my kids

[Pinksundress]

Kids are four and a half and (nearly) two

by 6 I’ve had enough of them (I know!)

Four year old goes in the shower. I can see and hear her. She likes playing in there.

Two year old I pop in the spare room and watches CBeebies on the TV in there. And I sit in my room.

I feel a bit mean sometimes like I should be interacting with them but … Anyway I guess I’m wondering if I’m BU?

OP that sounds fine. A 4 year can stand in a shower without you glued to their side. And a 2 year old can watch TV by themselves for a few minutes. I think some people must have far bigger houses than me for this to be an issue. I can see and hear them wherever I am (on the same floor of course).

Just to say your child is a bit younger but there’s lots of other stories on audible - when mine was younger he loved the Peter Rabbit stories - it’s called the Beatrix potter collection and it’s narrated by Andrew Scott who has a lovely lovely voice. It’s very calm and I honestly think this series helped my son’s speech and vocab hugely! He listened to it loads and even now still asks for it sometimes. There’s also the snail and the whale etc all the Julia Donaldson stories which your child probably already knows and might enjoy.

She could do that if you are standing in the bathroom

Why? Because she wants 20 minutes peace without someone climbing on her? OP has said she's with the children the majority of the day so why is 20 minutes sitting watching TV or playing the shower sad?

But you could still be in the bathroom with them and it could still happen. Why does being a few feet away in full view.ake any difference

With her mother having her in full view?

What size play pens are people using for a nearly 2 year old? My children would have climbed out or figured out how to open the gates at that age. Probably more dangerous tbh.

4yo should not be in the shower with you watching from afar! She could slip, decide to climb out, play with the taps, and to say ‘well it’s never happened before’ does not mean it won’t happen tomorrow. What a naive statement!!

Also is the room the 2yo in safe? I cannot believe that your need to have a break could compromise their safety.

Might be a random question but surely kids sleep in their own rooms by that age. So what's stopping them getting out of bed and doing things they shouldn't?

Or do you sit and watch over them all night?

A playpen for a 2 year old 😂😂😂 honestly mumsnet at its finest!

MN is often fueld by some sort of martyr mothers who do not have a life outside helicoptering their children.

Ofc it is normal 2y old child sits alone and watches tv for a bit.
Unless you sit in a left wing of a mansion whil she is in the right one and tv hangs from the wall supported by a shoe string. And you light the room by candels.

And 4y old cannot drown in a shower.
They can slip but they can also fall from the tree or par equipment they are climbing on and unless you are controling cow you would not stop a child from doing that.

What you do is perfectly normal and will let them adjust to life without 24/7 surveilance and entertainment.

I think young kids have died in the shower, something happens, like a toy falls into the plug and the water rises and they slip.

You really do have to be within arms reach xxx

If she wasn't in the bathroom but on a tablet or something that would be fine. I also reach my limit at some point in the evening.

A parent close by can grab hold before they fall,

a parent relaxing in bed can’t.

Lol a child will not drown if it takes you 2 seconds to get her out of the water.
You can be in the same room and still not be quick enough to grab before they go underwater.
Child will cry and get shaken a bit but nothing major will happen.

Are you HV or something? Never heard such fear from normal people

My DS managed to pull a hot cup of tea over himself once. I was sat right next to him and my mother the other side. I still to this day don't know how he managed it.

If id been saying on my loo when kids were small and they were in shower ( didn't have one at the time) I wouldn't have been able to stand up and reach behind the screen by the time they had fallen

And OP says her child SITS in the shower. Surely less chance of falling

You’re brave posting this on mumsnet 😂

Accidents can happen any time of course they can. What most on here are sensibly saying that the risk of a young child in water alone is one they aren’t willing to take.

Yabu
Have some time to yourself when they are in bed. Or let child play after shower/before bed.

Honestly, I’m completely, totally confident DD1 is safe in the shower 😂

These replies are bonkers!! You all must live in mansions!

but the 2 yo is not in the bath?
Bath and shower was hypothetical from another poster, the 2 yo is watching tv

I don't really understand what you want from this thread.

You have decided it's fine, most posters don't agree

You are insisting you are right.

So what?

That’s so true. Parenting is so boring at times. Like Groundhog Day!

I must admit I’m more relaxed in my attitude this time around. I wasn’t expecting to have to do it again, and refused to compromise some of my time.

My nearly 6 year old is just learning to wash her own hair at the moment so I step in to help with that but otherwise I put the shower on and sit on the floor whilst she gets on with it. No way I’d be able to jump and catch with my dicky knee.

Yes sure - a break sometimes, but surely the 4 yo is in nursery or school during the day? I still think close to bedtime sad not to spend that time with the kids and then relax on your own, but we all parent differently 🤷🏻‍♀️

Because it’s really the two year old I was asking about. I have explained this a few times now. Safety is important, but so is common sense. There is absolutely no need to hover anxiously over a four year old sat down in a shower. There may be a need, or at least an argument, for not having a two year old in a different room: there’s nothing dangerous in the spare room, it’s more from a sort of social point of view that worries me.

I do get that people aren’t here and can’t see the layout of the house but both children are in view and are safe.