Men DO NOT have right of way!

[CalmDownCats]

Has anyone else noticed this?

Since around my mid-40s I've noticed that, in particular older men my age or above, just barge straight towards me and expect me to get out of their way.

Since realising this seemed to actually be a thing, I now just hold my ground and keep going. I sometimes even get silly, smirky looks from them as they go around me, as if they know exactly what they are doing.

It's usually older guys, never really younger ones.

Is this just me or does it happen to others too? Is it something that's always happened to middle aged ladies or just a sign of the times?

In my experience this isn't a male/female thing, it's a town/city thing. People in cities - in my experience - tend to be more selfish, self absorbed, and in a rush to get where they're going with no regard for anyone else.

I'm normally very polite and considerate, but when I travel to and around London the other commuters/travellers drive me insane with how rude they are. What I do is pick an object in the distance as farrrrrr away as I can possibly see and stare at it intently, and people just magically move out of my way. Give it a try, I've heard that it's because people subconsciously notice where your gaze is fixed and act accordingly.

This happened to me even in my early twenties when I was super fierce (fuming feminist) and would laugh at them 😂. Nowadays I just smile and look at my phone until they move - I won't call them the Pr word any more but I still ain't moving!

Have experienced this a lot, very rarely with young men, and when it has been it's because they're not looking or turned away. Older men blatantly march towards me and grumble when I wait for them to move.

Sounds like all the people who have decided there is a thing called chicken going on are all playing chicken with each other and are all feeling aggrieved at the effrontery of everyone who’s doing the same back to them as they’re doing.

A vicious circle of irritability and chippiness.

Personally I haven’t experienced this. I’m polite to people and they’re polite back.

Yes, I'm afraid once we get past the juicy, young, voluptuous part of our lives, we fade away into middle age. We become invisible to many men, particularly the older blokes who once used to call us 'birds', or similar.

As a mobility-disabled 65-year-old lady, I'm completely blanked by such old boys! Or they distract and handle my assistance dog, ignoring me! They're not worth worrying about. They're too set in their ways to even consider change! Barge through them!

This isn't AT ALL what many women on here have encountered and explained.

I work in a hospital and deliver chemotherapy drugs to another department every day. I encounter so many couples and groups of people walking towards me filling the whole corridor- hospital corridors are wide for a reason. None of them ever seem to consider it necessary to move over even slightly so that we can pass safely. There are still the covid keep left stickers on the floor but obviously it doesn't apply to them. I'm in uniform BTW so clearly working.
If people are distressed I'll obviously move.

I just don’t understand it.

two people walking towards each other, one person has to move. If you walk straight your just as much a knob as the other one.

i find the complete opposite anyway. Usually I move and so does the other person resulting in an awkwardness

I've never had it happen to me but they try with my youngest boy who's 9 but looks far younger. He just says "excuse YOU how rude" 🤣🤣🤣🤣

there's an old woman on a mobility scooter at our school who tries to barge past everyone....no manners whatsoever.. but I just walk slower - i will not yield to a bully.

Same to the guy on a bike on the FOOTpath every morning dinging his bell at me and my son. Get f**d and wait. (Not nice when something slower holds you up is it Mr cyclist)
I have no tolerance for idiots any more the older I get.

This has always happened to me as long as I can remember and im only 30, I point blank refuse to move, I've had multiple men bump in to me that I solve by barging into them harder so they get knocked out the way and when a group do it I walk down the middle of them 🤣 I've had a few blokes who I've been walking with (my dad, friends, partners) question why I didn't move and I say "well why should I move for them?" I'm only 5"2 but very muscular 🤣

Never experienced this. In fact they often move out of my way or give me way. Weird

Carry a hot cup of coffee around with you, and don't be afraid to spill it on them.

I think manners aren't used as much generally in society. People seem to just he out for themselves and I think this is just a symptom of it.

If you think people walk straight through you as though you weren't there, try being in a wheelchair! 😂

If you're barging through disabled people you deserve to be knocked out by whoever witnesses that. Absolute dickhead of a person.

there's an old woman on a mobility scooter at our school who tries to barge past everyone....no manners whatsoever..

I think she posted earlier in the thread.

I think when it's groups and couples they sometimes are caught up and don't notice you - it's rarely the game vibe.

But yes, older men do seem to play this to feed their weird egos. I often look down if I see one coming - they generally let you past if they think you aren't looking where you are going - I'm usually too polite to go for a head on collision 😅

Once though, there was a guy headed straight for me from quite a distance - he looked at me a few times and seemed to be aiming at me like a heat seeking missile. It really annoyed me, so I kept going. We ended up face to face and his eyes were bulging out of his face with fury - he looked like a dangerous dog straining at the leash. I let him by, because I was afraid he might hit me 😅

love This - what a perfect response 😂

But may I ask, and I'm talking about single men, not groups, which is a different scenario, why should they move for YOU? Why shouldn't YOU move for them? You are playing the exact game as they are and have the exact same sense of entitlement? Or are you saying that men should move for women? In which case you are setting feminism back by quite some distance.

Exactly,Dont get it. Why is ok for Blondesailer to barge someone but if they play the same game they are somehow more wrong.
Most people dodge slightly to the left and the person coming at them does the same, simple,

So it's not just men and young women then... it's men, young women and people like you

To those who don’t see it, I think it’s much, much clearer if you live in a large city.

I live in a city with a population of 520,000 - annual tourist visitors over 4 million. This is not a phenomenon I've come across.

The reason I don't come across it is because
Most people dodge slightly to the left and the person coming at them does the same, simple,

I live in a town where the patriarchy is very much alive and normal due to our demographic.
If I go to smaller towns, villages etc it doesn't tend to happen and everyone gives way to each other as appropriate.

Men here do expect women to move all the time. I've sat on a bench and watched a mum with a pushchair and a walking toddler change their direction so that a bloke could carry on walking in a straight line. All he had to do was take two steps to the side instead of making her struggle.

I'm not talking about me barging through anyone. If I'm walking left near a wall and they cross a street for example they will walk into my obvious route and expect me to cross past them.
If you've never experienced it you won't have a clue what I'm talking about, but if you know, you know!!

We used to call it chivalry, it's dead and feminists killed it.

I've personally been growled at for doing things which I was raised to consider good manners (like opening / holding a door, offering a seat on public transport, giving way etc.).

You soon stop going out of your way for anyone when this is not an uncommon reaction.

We used to call it chivalry, it's dead and feminists killed it.

Bollocks have they.

If everyone walks on the left and moves to the left of there's a potential clash, it usually works. You shoukd move aside for wheelchairs, walking sticks, the blind, pushchairs, prams, i.e. anyone who cannot move aside as easily as you. (Not sure what happens on a narrow footpath if it's pram vs wheelchair, to be fair, but probably wheelchair should get priority.)

If you get to a door first, hold it open for others. If you get to a door, and someone is carrying a lot of stuff, hold it open. If they're in a wheelchair etc, hold it open.

Doesn't matter if they're male or female. It's really not difficult. But not everyone does this, hence patriarchy chicken.

I have a male friend who insists the man should walk on the traffic side of the pavement. He knows me well enough to warn me he does it. I just let him get on with it and keep on walking and tell him to go single file if there are other people about. I go in a mostly straight line, he keeps going all over the place every time we cross a road or come up to people.