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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it's inappropriate for parents to use sexualised humour around their 18+ children?

141 replies

HangryGooose · 18/05/2025 19:01

Really just curious to find out what others think.

I personally find it really uncomfortable and I'm not ok joking with my own kids in this way.

We were with friends of family at the weekend and they were openly joking with their kid (19) sexual innuendo type humour. One comment made was 'his favourite animal is definitely the beaver'.
Multiple type jokes directed his way throughout the evening.

Is this strange?

OP posts:
ClaySquish · 18/05/2025 19:09

Eugh I agree, it shouldn't be done.

theunbreakablecleopatrajones · 18/05/2025 19:11

No, they are adults.

I can understand you might not be comfortable with it but it’s like nudity or whatever, families are different

ChickenEggChicken · 18/05/2025 19:11

It wouldn’t be to my taste, but ‘inappropriate’? Assuming the nineteen year old in question isn’t being made miserable by it, no…

RumAndDietCoke · 18/05/2025 19:14

I wouldn’t do it around my son (he’s 22) but that’s just me and my personal choice. If others want to do it then that’s up to them, doesn’t bother me 🤷‍♀️

GoodVibesHere · 18/05/2025 19:15

It sounds like they are trying to be 'cool' parents. It's a bit gross.

felldown · 18/05/2025 19:17

I don't like it and my DC certainly would hate it but some families are like this. Some get drunk together, do drugs together and worse. Not everyone lives by the same values, surprise surprise!

SummertimeFeelingFine · 18/05/2025 19:17

I don't like it and it's not something we do.

Tillow4ever · 18/05/2025 19:57

Honestly, loosen your pearls a little! I bought my 16 year old a t-shirt he wanted . It said “M.I.L.F” on it, then in small writing underneath it said “man I love frogs”. There was a picture of a frog on it.

He and I have the same sense of humour, so I don’t see the issue with it at all. My parents have always used that kind of language/jokes around me too.

Different if the child doesn’t like it.

Endofyear · 18/05/2025 20:53

I have adult sons and they would cringe if we spoke like that in front of them 🤢

DoAWheelie · 18/05/2025 20:58

Every family has their own comfort levels. I've been able to joke like that with my parents from being about 14, my late OH could never joke about it with his own parents though - but would happily join in with me with mine.

As long as everyone involved feels comfortable I don't see any issue. If it's being forced on someone who doesn't like it then thats wrong but it sounds like it was a two way thing.

Octavia64 · 18/05/2025 21:02

No. It’s not strange.

some families do and some don’t but enough do that it’s not strange.

PiousBitch · 18/05/2025 21:03

Ha. I play Cards Against Humanity with mine...

pimplebum · 18/05/2025 21:07

At 19 I would be talking the exact same way to my child as I would with my friends

very weird to have two codes of conversation one with friends and one with adult children ??

AngelicInnocent · 18/05/2025 21:09

Omg total pearl clutching. If they are OK with it, why should it bother anyone else. A general, crap humour kind of comment too. It's not like they were going indepth about their sex life to him.

throwawaynametoday · 18/05/2025 21:15

Yeah I agree with you OP.

I love a good bit of banter with our late-teens DS, and in most ways our shared sense of humour is now fully adult (and very sweary). But I instinctively avoid sexual humour, although to be fair I'm not hugely into innuendo anyway.

I don't think it's a huge issue if other families are comfortable with it, but to me it just seems a bit inappropriate and odd.

Ruggerlass · 18/05/2025 21:58

Not strange at all. I’ve two sons and from around 17/18 they were always playing a game of how many innuendos they could get away with and husband would join in. Harmless fun and quite funny.

RedToothBrush · 18/05/2025 22:01

Your thread title is inappropriate.

This isn't a kid. This is an adult.

SummertimeFeelingFine · 18/05/2025 22:03

The thread title is perfectly appropriate. An adult is still the child of their parent.

MyIvyGrows · 18/05/2025 22:03

theunbreakablecleopatrajones · 18/05/2025 19:11

No, they are adults.

I can understand you might not be comfortable with it but it’s like nudity or whatever, families are different

This. It gives me the ick, but fully on board with it being my problem!

Redpeach · 18/05/2025 22:05

Are the adult kids allowed to tell naughty jokes?

Screamingabdabz · 18/05/2025 22:06

I think by the time they’re 19 they will have heard worse at school or college so it’s not exactly going to corrupt them and make their little ears bleed. I think it’s nice for parents and adult children to drop the PG niceties and meet on a level.

PorgyandBess · 18/05/2025 22:08

We have sons in their 20s and would never attempt to be ‘that’ parent that thinks they’re cool but are actually the opposite. We make each other laugh and have shared senses of humour, but there’s no way we’d make sexual jokes with them.

BellissimoGecko · 18/05/2025 22:32

Yabu. We do this all the time. Most of the time the dc make the jokes…

marmaladeandpeanutbutter · 18/05/2025 22:34

I’m not keen on it.

Original poster
HangryGooose · 18/05/2025 22:37

theunbreakablecleopatrajones · 18/05/2025 19:11

No, they are adults.

I can understand you might not be comfortable with it but it’s like nudity or whatever, families are different

That's a very good point, they are different.

OP posts: