Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask which celebrities would be really annoying to be married to?

547 replies

drspouse · 18/05/2025 09:48

Inspired by DS obsession with Steve Backshall.

He would be off round the world "too busy to do childcare darling", would come home reeking of bar poo, and would insist on taking the children to play with venomous snakes "it won't hurt them if they don't bother it".

OP posts:
Tessiebear2023 · 20/05/2025 16:42

Frankie Boyle. I find him intelligent and incredibly funny, the fact that he's Irish working-class from Scotland, with a give-no-shits attitude, is also attractive to me. His books are brilliant.

But be married to him? Beautiful ginger babies aside, I don't think it'd work out.

theedgeofthecloud · 20/05/2025 16:48

Jim Davidson

Tessiebear2023 · 20/05/2025 16:49

theedgeofthecloud · 20/05/2025 16:48

Jim Davidson

🤮🤮🤮 you win

Tessiebear2023 · 20/05/2025 16:51

How about Keith Floyd? Lovely dinners..

MarkingBad · 20/05/2025 17:01

Tessiebear2023 · 20/05/2025 16:51

How about Keith Floyd? Lovely dinners..

He'd smell terrible

WaffleParty · 20/05/2025 17:23

Just wanted to add to the Stephen Mangan appreciation (although I know it’s not in the spirit of the thread!). He’s gorgeous!!!!

Cojones · 20/05/2025 17:28

I’m with Walker1178

Shane Richie - he’d either be manically bouncing around like Tigger or down in the dumps because yet again all roads lead to Walford.

Dogaredabomb · 20/05/2025 17:41

OkimADHD · 20/05/2025 16:14

I kind of like him
A bit too skinny but his nickname is David ten inch lol

Show quote history

Ah, now I like him!

RedCrochetedWigFace · 20/05/2025 17:46

David Dickenson!
We all know he's the only one that calls him The Duke.

JMSA · 20/05/2025 18:01

theedgeofthecloud · 20/05/2025 16:48

Jim Davidson

Oh my God, yes!!! In fact, you win the thread 🤣

OkimADHD · 20/05/2025 18:11

PetaltotheMedal · 20/05/2025 09:35

Lorraine Kelly I say Lorraine Kelly as bad a Fred Elliot (Corrie) for repeating her sentences

I see your Lorraine Kelly and raise you James "the key to this classic, classic sauce" Martin, who when he is trying to ascertain what got his guest into their thing, just waffles "You started ... I mean, well, how did ... what, what, how, what ..." and the guest will realise that's their turn to speak then James will say "Well, you say that but I can see you're interested in this classic, classic dish. They key to this classic, classic dish ..." and "butter", "a decent amount of butter", "not just a bit of butter". Why oh why oh why does he have to take the butter off the pat with his fingers - just use a knife James, like normal people.

Note to self: the key to improving my mood is to stop watching classic, classic episodes of James Martin.

Couodnt with Lorraine either she's far to smarmy and nice

OkimADHD · 20/05/2025 18:13

Serrina · 19/05/2025 22:29

Alison Hammond strikes me as someone who is always "on".

I like her . I bet she'd be a scream to go out on the drink with

SparklesGlitter · 20/05/2025 19:28

Whatbloodysummer · 18/05/2025 10:51

John Travolta or Tom Cruise, or any of them in the Scientology cult.
I just couldn't imagine living under all those batshit 'rules' like no medical interventions etc

Oh crikey I’d forgotten about them. Both give me the ick

Ilikeadrink14 · 20/05/2025 20:02

Gossipisgood · 20/05/2025 09:10

Stephen Mulhern. I can't bare him yet everyone else seems to love him.

I loathe him with a passion!

Mounjaronew · 20/05/2025 21:29

I remember a thread on the stacey Solomon and joe swash series and joe definitely was coming off worst with Stacey very much felt sorry for.
I am currently watching it about 4 episodes in. I think he is a guy doing his best and i think they are an adorable loving couple. He’s such a kind person to all his family and very natural. Seems to be an unpopular opinion though. I can’t understand it.

Mounjaronew · 20/05/2025 21:55

Mounjaronew · 20/05/2025 21:29

I remember a thread on the stacey Solomon and joe swash series and joe definitely was coming off worst with Stacey very much felt sorry for.
I am currently watching it about 4 episodes in. I think he is a guy doing his best and i think they are an adorable loving couple. He’s such a kind person to all his family and very natural. Seems to be an unpopular opinion though. I can’t understand it.

Ps i definitely don’t want to be married to him but im happy for Stacey 😁

RedCrochetedWigFace · 20/05/2025 22:43

Tessiebear2023 · 20/05/2025 16:42

Frankie Boyle. I find him intelligent and incredibly funny, the fact that he's Irish working-class from Scotland, with a give-no-shits attitude, is also attractive to me. His books are brilliant.

But be married to him? Beautiful ginger babies aside, I don't think it'd work out.

Edited

I don't find him funny but his little boy giggle always make me laugh. 🤣

RedCrochetedWigFace · 20/05/2025 22:45

Mounjaronew · 20/05/2025 21:29

I remember a thread on the stacey Solomon and joe swash series and joe definitely was coming off worst with Stacey very much felt sorry for.
I am currently watching it about 4 episodes in. I think he is a guy doing his best and i think they are an adorable loving couple. He’s such a kind person to all his family and very natural. Seems to be an unpopular opinion though. I can’t understand it.

I agree. I think they both come across as nice people. I wouldn't want to be married to either of them but they seem genuine and seem to respect each other.

Tessiebear2023 · 20/05/2025 22:58

RedCrochetedWigFace · 20/05/2025 22:43

I don't find him funny but his little boy giggle always make me laugh. 🤣

Show quote history

Good point, ok maybe I will marry him.

NormasArse · 20/05/2025 23:11

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 20/05/2025 14:40

Not a “celebrity” as such, but every time I see Nigel Farage I think how insufferable it would be to be married to him. That smug face, stupid finger pointing, and self satisfied expression. His ridiculous and misplaced self assurance.

Eeeeugh. Doesn’t bear thinking about!

He makes my skin crawl.

BucketofTeaMassiveCake · 21/05/2025 11:18

I came on here to offer Jim Davidson but see I have been beaten to it.

Didshejustsaythatoutloud · 21/05/2025 13:03

TENSsion · 18/05/2025 13:33

Paloma Faith.

Omg, forget about her. Big YES from me too, euchhh

TENSsion · 21/05/2025 13:25

Didshejustsaythatoutloud · 21/05/2025 13:03

Omg, forget about her. Big YES from me too, euchhh

Show quote history

Part of me likes her but recently, all I’ve heard from her is complaining and moaning. She unbelievably lucky. Beyond privileged. I wish she was a little more grateful.
And cashing in on slating her children’s dad after years of being “private” is just gross.

ToWhitToWhoo · 21/05/2025 17:16

Also any hard-right (and some on the left) tabloid journalists: Richard Littlejohn, James Delingpole, Quentin Letts, Rod Liddle, Isabel Oakeshott (not to mention her horrible partner Richard Tice).

romany4 · 21/05/2025 18:57

VickyEadieofThigh · 18/05/2025 16:15

Neil Oliver is also mad as a box of frogs.

Show quote history

Shaggable though. And he loves Cathedrals like I do