School's punishment of all boys in year 6

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My son is in Year 6 and has done SATS this week, today was meant to be a fun day for them as they've finished all the papers.

But my son came back from school really upset as the teachers had separated the girls and boys and he says the girls got to do fun activities and given treats but the boys got told off and given a lesson on respect.

He's taken this badly and has said things like 'I must be bad because I'm a boy'.

It's such a shame because he's worked really hard and was otherwise enjoying SATS week, but now feels horrible about himself, the teachers who told them off and the girls getting rewarded when all the boys were punished.

I feel like I need to speak to the school next week and find out what's gone on and why. I also feel like making a complaint. But I'm not sure what they are going to do to make things better even if they did agree with me that it was not a great way to deal with some boy's bad behaviour and also very bad timing so should I just forget about it...?

What bizarre logic. So should we not have bothered apologising to the Windrush folk, people who were prosecuted for being gay, innocent people who've spent decades in prison for murders they had no connection with whatsoever, the postmasters and mistresses in the Horizon ordeal - on the grounds that 'there are just too many of them''?

And yes, I'm fully aware that being scapegoated and punished at school is many many degrees of seriousness below the horrendous suffering of the victims of the above scenarios - but the principle is exactly the same. If you've unjustly wronged one person, 100 people, 50,000 people, 5 million people, you apologise.

And how can those who didn't misbehave at all in the first place 'improve' their behaviour in order to 'earn back' what was already rightfully theirs?

Bollocks to that. Nobody should have to be punished for what other people have done. Why should the OP's son have to put it down to a life lesson? If, as the OP thinks, he hasn't done anything wrong, he has every right to feel aggrieved.
Would you be happy to put something down as a life lesson if you felt you were being punished for something you had no involvement in?!

I agree with this.

Ask him would he step in and challenge a boy he saw being disrespectful to a girl or heard speaking disrespectfully of a girl in a sexist way?

Why should the boys who were not guilty of any wrongdoing have to earn treats by improving their behaviour? If they've not done anything wrong, they shouldn't feel they need to behave any better.
Of course those who are guilty should absolutely be punished, but those who are not should receive an apology and an explanation from the teacher as to why they thought it was OK to punish every boy in that class.
If this has been the other way round, I'm sure the girl's parents would be furious that everyone of them had been tarred with the same brush.

I wouldn’t have been dishing out punishments on the last day of sats. But once I was going down that route I wouldn’t be apologising. We don’t know which boys did what. Not even OP’s saintly son. In these situations there is always degrees of innocence and guilt.

Fair enough if you personally believe that children should be seen and not heard, and they should accept that all adults always know better than them and so just meekly take whatever treatment they're given in silence... but most of us have moved on a long way from those attitudes over the last century or so.

Are you really telling me that, if several of your immediate neighbours were the perpetrators of antisocial behaviour, the authorities would be justified in coming and punishing you too, as 'it's obviously a rough street, this one'?

Yes

I think it’s quite obvious where you are coming from when you make mocking comments like
‘OPs saintly son’

Have you ever taught a Y6 class. I’ve never seen one which is silent and subservient. Nor would I want to

Which the teachers should have sorted out-not lazily punished the entire lot some of whom were even on the receiving end of the behaviour being punished and didn’t even play where it happened. Our space for football is small, the majority of boys don’t play football. If we collectively punished an entire year group of boys for behaviour whilst playing football most would be innocent.

I hope you’re not a teacher @derxa as you’ve seen a lot of y6 classes.
Your attitude that ‘some cohorts are just difficult’ in the context of this thread suggests you treat all boys as if they are the same.
That’s sexist.

How can a teacher be any good at all if they are sexist and assume all cohorts are the same? !

My DS is coming to the end of his second year at secondary school. He hasn't experienced anything like this, and neither have his friends; but if he did, you have my assurance that I would not shrug it off as 'normal' and would strenuously challenge it.

Just because abuse of children is sadly not rare, that doesn't make it in any way acceptable. I'm amazed that I just had to type that last sentence in a discussion on a parenting website.

I mean some groups of students are difficult no matter what age or sex they are. I said I wouldn’t have given out any punishments. Any sorting out of issues was for another day.

Sorry that must have been confusing.

He told me at home, he walks home from school on his own, it's not far. We went back to the school together because he'd left some of his stuff at school which he needed to go and get.

We had to go back into the school via reception because by the time we got there (around 20 mins after school finished) the gates and classroom doors had been closed.

Nobody has said that he's a saint or perfect; just that he should not have been punished for something wrong that he did not do.

If that's your attitude, why don't we just do away with actual courts completely and just have one single judge pressing a button online that says 'guilty' or 'not guilty', depending on whether he or she 'reckons they might have done it' after seeing a photo of the accused?

Or, if we wanted to keep the court system for traditional show purposes only, we could go through all the motions but just make it so that everybody tried on Monday to Wednesday is automatically found guilty and all those whose cases come up on a Thursday or Friday are told they're free to go?

Your logic is truly bizarre.

And yet you are happy with the misandry of all boys are bad.

🙄

and yet you don't have a argument against the point.

This just seems to get worse and worse.
I feel very sorry for OP's son and for the other boys who must have been very confused. And not being able to challenge the decision.

PPs have said you should challenge his point about being punished because he is a boy. I disagree because that is the message they have been given and it is exactly what has happened. This punishment is divisive and will do nothing to make the boys behave better. And just feeds into the arguments of the likes of Andrew Tate.

It’s absolutely not the sort of comment that’s worth arguing against. It was a massive own goal by you.

So you are unable to put forward a discussion point against it.

that's is all you have to say.

I don't believe for a minute that 100 boys have all behaved badly.
The schools have handled this terribly. They are simply reiterating the difference between boys and girls.
You are a boy so you behaved badly so you can't have then post SATs treat.
It's bad for both the girls and the boys to have this message

My boys have had their SATs this week. They were fine during but the post SATs crash has been incredible. The stress of exams + already starting with early puberty + one giant milestone towards the end of primary school. Completely the wrong week for a large scale punishment. OP im so sorry for your son.

Young boys are incredibly vulnerable to the likes of Farage and Tate telling them that white males are now the worst treated. Great work from the school in proving that. We cannot allow discrimination by sex against either boys or girls. I'd feel so let down and would be wanting to know how they planned to fix it before I escalated it. Punishing all of one demographic group is not OK.

Their school has had a bullying problem so significant the police got involved (girls WhatsApp group). The police came and spoke to the whole year but only those involved got punished.

Not willing to entertain is not the same as unable. I already cut off not all men nonsense because it’s not an argument that deserves any air time. Girls and their waterworks is another.

You haven't cut anything off you are just ignoring it.
Posters other than you are still pointing that its not all of the boys.

And you are unable to argue against weaponised crying because it goes against your narrative.