HELP! Inappropriate message from client I clean for.

[LemonLass]

Need advice on how to proceed, ladies.

Just started cleaning for a chap in his 70s in a town I lived in for 20yrs. His partner lives around 20 miles away and asked for help on his behalf. He has grown up kids and grandkids and is a professional (medical) semi retired.

I have cleaned for him twice and he goes out once I arrive.

I am due to clean tomorrow. He has just messaged to advise a plumber will be at his tomorrow. Owner will be out on his motorbike. OK, not ideal someone there but ok (I have a key).

Then I received this message. Urgh.

My instinct was block and dont engage and return key (he will be out).

Alternative to send this screenshot to the partner and say why I quit (and drop key as above).

Or go and clean as he wouldnt be there.

I am not a prude but his text was totally inappropriate. I had thought he had sent it in error but no word from him since to backtrack.

Comments and advice please ladies. Would you clean for this person under these circunstances. This extra money is £13ph self employed if that makes a difference to your comments (not a lot but very handy sideline).

How awkward!

PS i think i have successfully scrubbed anything identifiable.

When you send messages like that, you're waiting for a reply so he'd obviously notice if he'd sent it to you by accident. How would he accidentally tap your name, type the full message with your previous correspondence visible right above where he's typing the message and then press send without noticing he'd sent it to Jane instead of Sarah?

Nope!

Even if he's somehow sent it by accident, it's such a pervy message that it's his responsibility to at least send an apology message. It's not for you to give him the benefit of the doubt and start with the mental gymnastics trying to excuse or explain his behaviour.

Let his partner know what a dirty creep he is.

It looks like somebody else has sent it?
He seems professional in the other messages and then misses the capital A at the beginning. To me, that’s either not him who sent the message or you weren’t the intended recipient.
I’d reply saying “I beg your pardon?” and the next message after that would give me my answer.

Reply that he’s sent you a message obviously for someone else. Tell him it happens and no problem as you have forgotten it already. See what he replies

Also, side issue, and don't know where you are, but £13 per hour for SE cleaning is very low.

Exactly. And this seems to be OP's instinctive response too.

I would have to know what happened! I would also assume it was for someone he was going to meet on his bike. I think I'd send it to his partner and say I think he meant this for you.

I wouldn't tell his partner but I would respond with ' I think you've sent me this message in error, don't send me messages like this'

This is what my gut reaction is but I can be impulsive. I wanted to make sure I am not jumping to conclusions. It was a case of "what now?"

He can chit chat text (all innocent) but as it is a fornightly clean, I answer his texts Mon to Fri 9 to 5 and only if requires confirmation to do my job there e.g. you are out of CIF or toilet rolls

Wow. The amount of people on here giving this perv an out is shocking!

Have you messaged back?! I would definitely make a point of saying something, whether it is to say it's inappropriate and you won't be cleaning or if you believe it's a mistake to say was this meant for me. I wouldn't just leave it there and turn up to do the cleaning.

If his partner employed you, I'd forward her the message and say that's why you won't be returning.

@BakelikeBertha
"If i am that bothered"?

This is potential sexual harassment and no explanation or apology. I am bothered enough to ask advice from strangers because it has bothered me.

I would reply and say I don’t think that was meant for me.
it did seem a bit out of the blue, I wonder if it was a mistake not intended for you.
I really don’t know if I would go back. If it was easy cash and I needed it I might have to.
if I could replace the income with someone else then I might not go back.
it’s really your personal choice.

Text and ask if it was meant for you. If it is post the keys back and don t go again.

Without checking it wasn’t a mistake?

So entirely let him off the hook without him even having to provide any kind of explanation, while making it clear that she has no boundaries and will excuse concerning/offensive behaviour on his behalf. 👏

Do you know 100% that the message was for the op?

I only saw up to the last paragraph too. Then after reading pp comments clicked on the message.

Totally blindsided!

It’s tricky but it could be other things if he’s given no signs of anything before? Firstly in error and may not have even realised he’s sent it to the wrong person. Secondly, has he given any signs of dementia? That could be a possibility. You need to question it regardless but listen to your gut on whether it was meant for you.

My first assumption is that it’s not meant for you. He may not yet realise he has sent it to wrong person yet. Tricky to figure out if this is the case however.

Posters reprimanding others for him an out 🙄 adults are allowed to dirty talk to their partners. It’s not an out, it’s a plausible incident.

I don't need to, @ButterCrackers, in order to see that your suggested response is a really bad idea.

He'd have apologised by now if it was a 'mistake'. Sounds like he got a thrill out of making the OP read it but wanted to be able to claim 'mistake' afterwards. Creep.

@ButterCrackers
"No problem" is a lie because his text is totally inappropriate. It is a big problem (as is his lack of follow up apologising or explaining a "mistake'.

My response is to check first. Always best to do before wrecking someone’s life.

Might have been meant for his partner but I would do what you said....

Alternative to send this screenshot to the partner and say why I quit (and drop key as above).