Another parent has reported me to my DD’s school for comment in a WhatsApp group

[Wonderwallafterall]

Hi all,

A bit of an unusual/embarrassing one which I’d welcome your thoughts on.

I am in a Mum’s WhatsApp group with others from my DD’s class. It’s often a useful reminder for things needed the next day and has been used to organise parties/confirm attendance etc.

Usually, a few people will put something in there on a Friday/Saturday such as ‘enjoy your weekend’ and often accompanied by a photo of a glass of whatever they are drinking.

Weekend just gone, someone put a photo of their drink whilst in a bar and said they’d just seen one of the teachers from the older years in there too.

He’s somewhat attractive, let’s just say, and a couple of people replied to that along the lines of ‘no photo of him?!’ and ‘I bet you won’t be leaving in a hurry’.

A friend of mine then replied with something a bit more ‘colourful’ and I followed up with something similar. In my defence, I was drinking and a bit carried away - when I read it back the next day I was mortified.

Anyway, one of the Mum’s left the group and to cut to the chase, I’ve since learnt she has reported the comments to the school. She is usually quiet in there and mainly keeps herself to herself IRL too.

Am I overthinking this but surely other than me being suitably humiliated if the teacher ever learns of what was said, I’ve not actually done anything wrong as commenting on a teacher is not a crime?

This.

IMHO WA groups outside of extremely close friends/family should be pretty ‘clean’ in language/vocabulary.

You will always get that one person who is so offended they will escalate it or make a big deal of it.

I'd just ignore the whole issue unless someone who you have to answer to brings it up. Then say, yeah, I do regret making an off-color remark after a couple of drinks.

Beyond that one simple sentence, don't say any more because some people love to keep drama stirred up and any input from you is likely to be repeated and make it all flare up again. Be very boring now!

But there's no one among us who hasn't spoken inappropriately a few times. It's not that big of a deal.

So, my best guess is that it will blow over within a few days if you don't engage about it. I'd also guess that at least half the people on there think the mother who tattled is ridiculous. Just don't do it again! 😂

I wonder what the “OP’s comment is ok because women are not a threat to men” crew would say if they had a young son who was a male teacher and discovered a group of women were discussing him in this way. If your son was creeped out or upset would you tell him to suck it up because the women in question cannot physically harm him?

I don’t think all men would find this kind of chat harmless, amusing or flattering.

Blimey it’s a good job I didn’t post what I was actually thinking as suitable punishment as that would send some of you over the edge I think!

We really need an eye rolling reaction 🙄

Why on earth would the school be the slightest bit interested in this? That mother sounds like she thinks she still a primary aged pupil 😂. I’m embarrassed for her.

What would you say to that OP out of interest?
x

Cringetastic! I work in a school, you’ll be Her That Said That until your kids leave. Every day.

Bloody hell lol
that was a bit racey!

Meh, I don’t think blokes need a WhatsApp group, they just say it in person to each other the dirty buggers!

Only the four more years to go 😬

I'm pretty easygoing, but I think this is so inappropriate on a Whatsapp group for parents! Different if it was a private one for friends. Agree with @ScrewedByFundingit just seems gross, also interesting you're not saying what was actually said. I wouldn't bother reporting it though.

I have - to save you scrolling back I said I wanted to sit on his face.

It’s an unfunny joke from people who think the evidence of a Prosecco glass shows they have a great social life.

So glad I'm not part of any parent whatsapp groups.

Ha ha, yes I just saw that. Bit much I think! 🤢 the humiliation when everyone finds out will be punishment enough I reckon, you might need to start wearing a disguise to school 🥸

I don’t think it’s a big deal but voted YABU because it’s the school chat- and it’s a bit naive to treat it as a place for banter. I also think as others have said if it was a dad’s chat about a female teacher it would be seen as creepy. Sounds like the conversation belonged in an unhinged private group chat with your mates. But saying that I don’t think I’d feel comfortable speaking about someone teaching at my child’s school this way. I’ve been objectified in professional roles before and it isn’t nice.

No Judgement tbf from me but if your DH said the male equivalent of face sitting - cock in mouth I guess? And bundle her sexy arse off in a van back to his bedroom would you have found it equally hilarious ? Given she was smoking hot and he clearly fancied her ?

genuine question- not being trite
x

If he was squirming due to being told it was to be reported then I definitely would!

Ah fair play, my sister and her husband both very open about who they fancy lol

She was truly unhinged.

Exactly this … it is crude and disrespectful. Is this the role model you want to be for your children?

I wouldn’t worry about it! I mean, I’d never make a joke like that but I’m a prude! But knowing what working in a school is like, this really won’t be their priority, your take might even given them a few laughs! Tut tut though, know your audience next time 😉

Will be stigmatised; not justifying the comments made. Purely a defensive approach, to not make more drama…