To think that not speaking to your own son is not a good look for the King ?

[Marmaladelover]

Don’t get me wrong I think Harry has been a bit of an entitled burk but even so I was shocked that there has not been a reconciliation between Harry and Megan and the King and Queen at least to be civil to each other .
Refusing to even speak just seems like sulking to me !
That said I don’t think Harry telling the world and washing yet more dirty laundry in public is going to help matters .

Maybe some folk will think this comment belongs in the Royal Family thread rather than AIBU but it’s more about mumsnet standards ( sulking is not good ) and whether they should apply to those in high office .

Even JFK and Krushev had a hotline after the Cuban Crisis !

Harry is a complete hypocrite. He hates the press but goes running to them to give interviews whenever he doesn't get his own way.

They are estranged from Meghan's father because he went to the press to dish the dirt on them, but they do the same thing to the royals.

Would you want a difficult family reconciliation meeting if you thought your relative would go bleating to the press about how horrible you were?

Royal family don't have "best man" they have sponsors

You cannot fake the kind of genuine closeness harry and kate showed regularly in front of the camera

Have you read Spare ?

I’ve read spare and it made me realise that Meghan gets all the hate unfairly. Harry came across as spoilt, entitled and unintelligent. He has a chip in his shoulder bigger than the moon.

It doesn't need to be a 'good look'. They aren't celebrities

The royals are not there on merit and they've not been voted for.

There is no way to remove them from post.

They can literally do what they want with no accountability and nobody can do anything about it.

No. They are called supporters.

@Needspaceforlego oh please!!

Harry wouldn't have the same relationship at all with Kate parents or family!
Everyone knows what an incredible influence Kate family has had for William.
Being a good dad?

Putting your children first?
Not being utterly selfish?

What do you think about Charles book?

If I recall correctly, the tabloids whipped up a frenzy because HMQ and Co stayed in Balmoral instead of hustling down to London to perform at the demand of Piers Morgan and his ilk. The royals were hissed and booed when they did a short inspection of the flowers at the gates of Buckingham Palace on arrival. Imo the boys were marshalled into the cortege to help ensure no public anger was displayed towards the RF. Given the opinion of the RF at the time - overall low, with many believing the RF actively complicit in Diana's misfortune - the visible presence of the boys was a 'necessary' piece of reassurance. Duty before Desire etc. Poor children.

Show empathy? Like you have in your words? 🙄 you are obviously another fan of " do as I say but not as I do"

Wishing death on someone? That doesn't make your points sound clear and well thought out at all.

This.

Any meeting between them would end up on Netflix, in a book or on a blog. Maybe the King wants privacy.

In a way, Harry's nonsense is strengthening the monarchy, no-one wants Harry and his mrs to be able to claim responsibility for causing the collapse of the monarchy. Apart from which, the monarchy is Harry's USP, lose that and he really is nothing.

The bottom line is that we don't know for sure what happened, just because Harry says so doesn't make it true! One version I read is that William said he was going to walk and Harry said Well, if he's walking then so am I!

Is William not his family? He slagged him off pretty thoroughly I thought and was critical of Charles

Don’t forget he openly called one soldier friend a p**i and another a raghead - in a video, so there’s no denying he did it. How is that non-racist?

How could Harry cause the Monarchy to collapse?

Constitutional monarchy only exists with the consent of the people. If we reject them, they have to go. Scandals are more dangerous for them than for average people. Harry is one scandal after another.

It must be hard to maintain a relationship if you can't talk freely. You can't talk freely if the trust is gone. He can't ever talk to him about anything important because there's a real risk it will get parrotted to the press/ become part of the next book. Obviously important to start rebuilding the relationship but not sure how it gets back to a natural one where he's back in the circle of trust.

Having said that families are complicated and they need to talk to start rebuilding.

This is a very good point.

After what he’s already done / written putting his own victim spin on everything they would be mad to talk to him as it will just give him more ammo for the next book / interview .

The whole family /institution/thing is dysfunctional. It will never end well , because neither of them are what the other wants/needs.

Harry had a role to play as the spare and he did it successfully for years . When he stopped, he outlived his usefulness. Not just that, but he started royally (see what I did there?) fucking up and going the complete opposite direction. That is not what Charles/the crown wants or needs, and relationships in that family are most of all about usefulness and optics. Sure, it still goes tits up , but that’s the primary concern. Harry does not fit the mould anymore, he is unpredictable and has lost their trust, so even on a personal(even if extremely superficial)level he can’t really be brought back into the fold.

Harry wants a king to be a bog standard dad. He wants all the benefits of having a king as a dad, but at the same time his dad to put him first, not the crown/firm. That will never happen. So he keeps kicking off pointlessly, with nothing in return , like a toddler(or Meredith Grey). See me! Want me! Choose me!Love me! Pick me!Charles is not and will never be the dad he wants or needs. Mainly, because he can’t have it both ways .

On and on it goes , an incredibly toxic merry go round .

So not consorting with sex offenders, putting National Security at risk by befriending spies, charging charities and the NHS for using land, raking in cash and then putting out the begging bowl for repairs of properties, trying to get Covid payments for Buck House, not declaring or paying anywhere near the tax rate they should be getting exemptions from legislation etc etc etc wouldn't bring down the Monarchy but Harry would? If anything he is a human shield for all their other shenanigans. They have the entire establishment covering up for them and allowing them to get away with whatever they want to do, and an army of courtiers all too willing to fall on their swords and admit wrongdoing in order to protect them, yet Harry is going to bring down the Monarchy with his whining? Says it all really!

Oh it’s like brookside who cares

The reason they skated past mostly unscathed with all of those issue and many others is because of the “never complain, never explain” mantra (and circus for the masses) which a lot of the public bought hook, line and sinker. Harry committed the cardinal sin of (massively) complaining and (over) explaining. Whether you believe him or not , it’s irrelevant. They can’t afford to “forgive” as it might open the flood gates to more of it. Not just that , but Harry is basically demanding explanations as part of the reconciliation. Again, they can’t afford to set precedents with that, because other demands for explanations will definitely follow (like the issues you mentioned). Now , if Charles gave in, it could very well bring down the monarchy eventually, once it’s not protected by that mantra . He knows it too and that it’s not just his reign at stake. So he’s being a good King and protecting the monarchy.

YABU

We don’t really know exactly what was said and done on both sides. Sometimes, there really is no point in reconciling as neither party feel they were in the wrong and will continue as they are- this will only lead to more conflict and hurt for one or both sides. Sometimes it is better to recognise that reality rather than trying to pretend everything always work out in the end. Maybe the king has reached that point.

Also, Harry has previously made it clear he wants reconciliation on his terms and on his terms only- including his entire family admitting they were entirely in the wrong, he and Megan were nothing but victims. Which is unlikely to be the case- one side is hardly ever blameless. Under these circumstances, I think I might not chose reconciliation.

Furthermore, how could his father (or any of his family) trust him after everything he wrote in that book and the interviews they have have given. I imagine that they would have concern that anything they say or do may well end up being used for Harry and/or Megan’s own purposes and their own twist put on it. I’m not sure I would want to reconcile with a family member I could not trust.