To not want to share a room at age 27?

[Tangw]

Every year, our extended family rents a big house and we spend a week together. Always rent the same house.

Growing up, I have always had to share a room with a younger female relative. This hasn’t happened for a number of years because usually someone in the family can’t come for whatever reason, so me or the relative gets to have the spare room.

This year, everyone can make it which is great. But that means that I have to share a bedroom for the week. AIBU to not want to share at this age?

@SomeDanceToForget Well yes, but when it's a freebie, you either take what's on offer or you don't go (or you make your own arrangements as I do when visiting my SIL :-).

As I said upthread, I think that it could well be the money that's the issue with the OP's holiday as well.

Has OP said it’s a freebie?

My family went on a big villa holiday a few years ago. At the time I was about 31 and single, my auntie 50 and single. We shared a twin room. It wouldn’t have been my top choice BUT my grandma was paying for the whole thing so I was happy to suck it up! We only used the room for sleeping anyway and we just took it in turns for getting changed.

Are you paying for any of it? If not, you’re not really in a position to make demands of others. If you’re not happy it, don’t go.

The OP hasn’t shared whether she’s paying or not. I was responding to your comment about @EconomyClassRockstar ’s upcoming holiday with her adult children.

My assumption is that her adult children are happy to share a room because they’re getting a free holiday. Again, it comes down to money and what ppl are willing/able to pay.
I think that’s probably the issue with the OP’s family - perhaps she’d be best off getting her own accommodation.

But just because some people are willing to share doesn’t mean everyone else will be, so someone telling is that their children are happy to share is irrelevant to OP who doesn’t want to share. People are different, I’m not sure why some people can’t just accept that.

In which case she doesn't have to go.

The OP has been asked many times who is paying what, and chosen not to answer, which is why I suspect people are concluding that she is accepting a holiday that her parents are paying for. We don't know that to be a fact, but I suspect if it weren't the case then OP would have been quick to point out it wasn't the case.

The happiest people in the world are those who manage their expectations. Horses for courses. 5* hotels and single rooms if you're paying for them and organising your own holiday. Family holidays involve compromise.

Are you paying per room or person? If you have a room to yourself d you pay double?

If someone else is paying it’s pretty obnoxious to demand your own room. If you are paying then do what you like. Heading off on girls weekend we are sharing rooms would double the cost otherwise.

Op at the lofty age of 27 have you ever organised/ paid for a group holiday yourself? Or have you only ever rocked up as the paid for guest?

As others have said who is paying for the holiday, how is that working?

I dont think it is weird to share a room with a cousin or family member for a week. I would do that and have been away with friends from time to time and shared a room. I am older than 27 if that makes any difference.

If you are not happy with this you can choose not to go or find something different for everyone and negotiate with them how the cost is divided.

I'm in my 40s and sharing a hotel room soon with friends. Don't know what the big deal is?

You do a “Liz” from motherland and by a little pop up tent for the garden!!

I've mum friends who go away and share rooms in their 30s and 40s. Age not the issue here. Are you paying?

Don’t go then. If 27 is too old to share a room, it’s old enough to not feel obliged to go on big family holidays.

It’s not remotely weird to room share on holiday OP. And even less weird to share with your cousin! Age is not a factor here.

However, if YOU don’t want to, then don’t 🤷‍♀️

Seems a shame though as you’ll miss out on a nice family holiday.

Obviously a lot of people at any age are fine with sharing if that's the way to afford a holiday they want, but if my parents were paying for a holiday and siblings 1&2 always get single solo room and I always have to share with a cousin I would think it's reasonable to ask why I'm always the one picked on to have the less good experience. If no one is getting a single solo room then op is being unreasonable, but if solo rooms exist and op is never considered worthy of having one, op is reasonable.

Just rent another place nearby so you have your own space to go to at night, if you really don't want to share.

You’re seriously not comparing a married couple sharing to two random cousins sharing who may never see each other all year?

I’ve been married for years but even I can see the difference!

Why can’t one of the couples ‘just rent a place’?

I went away with friends in December, 3 of us shared a room at the travelodge. I’m 57! It’s not a big deal. As long as the relative is the same gender, I don’t see the issue.

People are perfectly entitled not to want to share a room. My preference now on our ladies holidays is for a single if it’s more than a couple of nights and hell would freeze over before I share a bed.
Sometimes I will share a room if I know my travel companion is on a tighter budget to make it affordable for them.

However that’s because I am paying for it myself and can afford it, if you’re not then you need to suck it up or not go.

Ok OP, what are your options?

A) Persuade the group to rent a bigger place. But you tried that and it didn't work, right?

B) Make your own arrangements close by.

C) Don't go

As A seems to have not worked out for you, it's either B or C.

Because they're happy with the shared house arrangement and they don't want to presumably.

But in an equal family everyone’s needs would be taken into consideration. Just because the couples are happy with arrangement doesn’t mean it should continue.

The bias towards couples on this thread is awful.