AIBU to be annoyed neighbour put spikes on the fence?

[SunnyLuny]

We’ve lived in this house for nearly 5 years. At first neighbour was very welcoming and friendly. She’s an older lady (late 60s?) who lives on her own. She used to be lovely to our children. The past 3 years though shes just completely changed. She stopped talking to us, actively avoids us and blanks us. If we smile and say hello when we see her she looks down and pretends we aren’t speaking to her. It’s so bizarre. The only thing that has changed is we got a cat. He is an outdoor cat and admittedly probably does go into her garden.

Today she’s been hammering spikes into the fence! No warning or conversation. Infact whenever we go outside she runs into her greenhouse to hide until we go back in! I think this is so passive aggressive and I’m actually upset that she seems to think she can’t even approach us. We’ve always been friendly. She’s never spoken to us about the cat bothering her. I probably wouldn’t be bothered about the spikes if she had told us beforehand or said she had an issue with the cat. DP thinks I should go speak to her and just ask what’s going on but my parents think I should just ignore it. Aibu if I say something?

Ignore, if it is the cat that's bothering her the cat will probably find another way into her garden if it wants to. If it doesn't win win.

It’s a shame that you had a previously good relationship and it has soured due to the cat. I would write her a letter and try and find a solution to the cat going into her garden.

The cat shits in her garden and she’s too worried to bring it up. She’s furious, but rather than tell you and cause confrontation she’s just keeping her head down.

Adding spikes to fences is no longer legal

Why do the spikes even bother you?

cat owner. Good on her.

It can’t be a shared fence. One of you owns it.

Certain types are legal. All dependa on the fence really

Where did you read this? We were burgled not long ago and the police told us we could put 'cat spikes' on our fences and gates as they deter burglars.

Incorrect.

He is an outdoor cat and admittedly probably does go into her garden.

And craps in it.
There is your answer.

If you're aware that your cat is probably shitting in her garden, why didn't you do something to prevent it in the first place? You could have got roller for the tops of your fence to stop the cat getting out of your own space - then she wouldn't have had to get spikes.

The spikes may not be legal, because they can cause harm to emergency services needing to gain access.
We have a covered outdoor litter tray for our cat , largely because he was peeing in my peony pot, we empty it and keep it clean other cats don't seem to use it I assume because it smells like him. That would stop him going to the toilet in her garden.
Why don't you talk to her and say Joan I've noticed you put spikes on the fence, is there an issue?

I think people are misinterpreting my post - I am FINE with her putting measures in place I just personally think spikes with absolutely no warning is rude. I wouldn’t ask her to take the spikes down - infact I want to repair the broken relationship! The chat would to ask how long he has been bothering her, is there anything on my end she wants me to do.

I’m not visually seeing my cat shit in her garden and shrugging my shoulders. I’ve seen my cat sitting on our fence and walking along her grass. I don’t know what he’s doing when I can’t see him, which is why I would’ve appreciated her telling me she’s having an issue.

I don’t know who the fence belongs to, I just say shared fence as a blanket term. Her garden is a L shape that curves around the back of ours.

You say it was out of nowhere but for her, you getting a cat was out of nowhere too. Did you ask your neighbours how they feel about such an anti social choice of pet?

You are a hypocrite. You admit your cat will go into your neighbours garden but didn’t talk to her about it first, yet you expect her to have spoken to you first about something that barely affects you. You started it.

If anything you should go round and apologise because you have finally realised that your pet has been bothering her, and reassure her that now you’ve copped on, you will cat proof your own garden.

Well that’s what I was proposing to do but people seem to be outraged at that 😅

I mean I don’t see my own cats shit in my garden but I know they are despite them all having their own litter trays they use.

This.

Plastic spikes are perfectly legal and actually don’t tend to stop cats that’s much. Our council tell people to use them.

You're being disingenuous. You know the cat is going in her garden and of course you know what it's doing whilst there.

You apparently want a conversation to repair the broken relationship, but you haven't initiated one in three years?

Did you give her warning you were going to let a cat use her garden as a toilet? Was that rude?

Is it even legal to put spikes?

Not everyone likes cats. In fact a lot of people dislike them and virtually everyone even cat lovers would hate them pooing in their garden.

I would much rather spikes on my fence than a cat pooing in my garden. She might take a lot of pride in her garden. I feel really sorry for her.

People don’t like confrontation and as she’s an older lady on her own, she was probably mortally afraid of bringing it up in case you reacted badly. Not particularly rational but also not uncommon.

Did you train your cat to use a litter tray, on your property?

Nah, YABU. She doesn't want your cat shitting all over her garden. I wouldn't want that, either.

Did you miss the part of my post where I said I smile at her, say hello, and try interact but she completely and utterly pretends I don’t exist? There’s been plenty of opportunities