Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Offended by friend’s comments about party food

807 replies

LinsMum22 · 28/04/2025 20:45

We hosted my friend, her husband and three kids yesterday afternoon. Our sons are in the same football team and we said we’d put some food on at ours after and watch the Liverpool match who they both support. My friend agreed to party style food being the best option as everyone could pick at it as and when.

Amongst other things, there was - Indian selection, tempura prawns, sausage rolls, mini pizza’s, mini sausages, chips, breaded chicken. So a good mix all from Iceland where we’ve had positive comments on the food before.

I could tell my friends’ youngest looked unimpressed when they tried one of the items, and pulled a face to my friend. She made no
attempt to get them to try another item and basically said ‘I know’. I noticed five minutes later she had barely ate anything herself either.

15/20 minutes later, the youngest moaned again and this time my friend said ‘don’t worry, we will stop at McDonald’s on the way back as I’m hungry too.’

I text her after they left to say sorry if they didn’t enjoy the food. She replied to say they didn’t realise it would be that sort of food and that they’d have got something else before coming round if they realised!!

AIBU to find this really snobby and ungrateful? The fact she then took the kids to get a McDonald’s makes no sense!!

OP posts:
eggandonion · 30/04/2025 11:36

Cheeses and meats sounds fancier than cheese and ham. I'm going to go plural.

coupebaby · 30/04/2025 11:40

Mummytotheboy · 30/04/2025 09:31

I think what you served was more snacky bits, nibbles some would say. If I was serving party food there would be sandwiches, salad, quiche, a fruit platter, dips, coleslaw, crisps plus what you served. I think they was just hangry as they expected to be able to put a plate of food together and they got nibbles hence the mcdonalds. All that aside they where incredibly rude. You have these conversations in the car on the way to mcdonalds not in front of the host. Even if you hated it you say thankyou for inviting us the food was lovely!

This is my way of thinking exactly, whenever I’ve had “party food” it’s basically along the lines of what you listed, Iceland food is just that, nibbles, when I live ever gone to a party it was always buffet style everything laid out and plate up, some meat bits, salads, crisps/dip etc this isn’t what you get with Iceland nibbles so was disappointing for the friend but as you said absolutely no need for her to be so bluntly rude in front of OP, she maybe should have being honest and said sorry I thought be something different and not too fussed on anything here but thanks so much anyway and don’t worry we’ll grab something on the way home, OP may have offered to make them something else and all forgotten about or maybe not and still would’ve wrote the post I don’t know lol

HellDorado · 30/04/2025 12:44

Iceland food is just that, nibbles, when I live ever gone to a party it was always buffet style everything laid out and plate up, some meat bits, salads, crisps/dip etc this isn’t what you get with Iceland nibbles so was disappointing for the friend

For heaven’s sake, they were sitting around watching the football!

ruethewhirl · 30/04/2025 12:52

coupebaby · 30/04/2025 11:40

This is my way of thinking exactly, whenever I’ve had “party food” it’s basically along the lines of what you listed, Iceland food is just that, nibbles, when I live ever gone to a party it was always buffet style everything laid out and plate up, some meat bits, salads, crisps/dip etc this isn’t what you get with Iceland nibbles so was disappointing for the friend but as you said absolutely no need for her to be so bluntly rude in front of OP, she maybe should have being honest and said sorry I thought be something different and not too fussed on anything here but thanks so much anyway and don’t worry we’ll grab something on the way home, OP may have offered to make them something else and all forgotten about or maybe not and still would’ve wrote the post I don’t know lol

Show quote history

What’s wrong with just nibbles? People are too obsessed with filling their faces at social occasions these days. It’s supposed to be about getting together with people you enjoy spending time with, not what’s on the menu.

JudgeJ · 30/04/2025 13:33

that whiny rude child was no Liverpool supporter

Probably a Man Utd fan if rude and whiny!
Years ago my brother had a 'girl friend', both in their 40s, and she came a couple of times to our home when we did a buffet meal, all freshly cooked meats, salmon etc. little bought in except M and S quiches, salads like rice salad, potato salad homemade etc etc. On both occasions she picked up her plate, walked round the table and put her plate down, my brother looked so embarrassed. SHe didn't get asked a 3rd time!

Fuzzymuddle33 · 30/04/2025 13:33

This is incredibly rude of her.

And if she’s then off to McDonalds she can’t be snobby re food.

Its bizarre.

I wouldn’t bother with her again. she isn’t worth it and life is too short.

You bring your kids up to not be rude, not support them in it.

I feel cross on your behalf.

TheRoundTable1983 · 30/04/2025 13:37

Yep. Very rude. Just don't ask them over again.

Fuzzymuddle33 · 30/04/2025 13:37

AND if you have or are a ‘fussy’ eater you take something of your liking to flippen contribute.

RumbleMum · 30/04/2025 13:39

Gemmawemma9 · 28/04/2025 20:55

Doesn’t matter whether anyone “wouldn’t like that food either”.
whether you like it or not, it’s really fucking rude to pull faces and comment on food that someone has kindly provided for you. She wants to teach her children some manners (and get some herself while she’s at it!).

This right here.

cramptramp · 30/04/2025 13:44

This thread is why Mumsnet is a joke to so many people. Snobby, humourless wankers. It doesn’t matter if there is no fresh food or fruit at a kids party. It won’t kill them eating frozen food for one afternoon. Stuff some avocado and home made pesto on sourdough when you get home ffs.

GustyBaloo · 30/04/2025 13:49

Fuck her. There were plenty of nibbles. If she wanted vegetables and greenery she wouldn't be stopping off at McDonald's.

HellDorado · 30/04/2025 14:35

TheHerboriste · 30/04/2025 01:05

No one knows if they got burgers at McDonald’s, which also sells salads, wraps and fish.

Show quote history

Yes, whenever I’m in there I find myself torn between the grilled Dover sole with wilted spinach or the pan-seared sea bass on a bed of radicchio. So usually I plump for the cod burger in orange breadcrumbs served with a slice of bright yellow cheese in a bun.

lilaclemon · 30/04/2025 14:37

It’s cheap low quality food and you must know that. Not to everyone’s taste but not necessary for your friend to be rude.
And your friend going to McD’s is hardly upmarket…

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 30/04/2025 14:39

Do you have any idea how snobbish you sound?

lilaclemon · 30/04/2025 14:40

Or realistic?

LillyPJ · 30/04/2025 15:37

All these people on here specifying their idea of what 'party food' is - I don't think it's set in stone! Amazingly, other people might have different ideas.

DisagreeingALot · 30/04/2025 18:14

I think some common sense is needed. The OP and her friend agreed to having ‘party style food’. But this was not a party in the conventional sense. This was a family coming over to watch a football match on TV together. It was not a full-blown catered party.

The OP just mentioned to her friend the genre of food she was getting. I think her selection falls under the umbrella of ‘party food’.

I can’t believe anybody is defending the friend. Her behaviour was downright rude and lacked grace, gratitude and humility.

Calliopespa · 30/04/2025 21:33

JudgeJ · 30/04/2025 13:33

that whiny rude child was no Liverpool supporter

Probably a Man Utd fan if rude and whiny!
Years ago my brother had a 'girl friend', both in their 40s, and she came a couple of times to our home when we did a buffet meal, all freshly cooked meats, salmon etc. little bought in except M and S quiches, salads like rice salad, potato salad homemade etc etc. On both occasions she picked up her plate, walked round the table and put her plate down, my brother looked so embarrassed. SHe didn't get asked a 3rd time!

It’s mind boggling that she couldn’t have thought I just need to pick a couple of things for the sake of being decent.

I have been known to use strategically positioned lettuce leaves or bread to “puff” out my fairly empty plate and stop it looking as though I took very little. But you have to think of something or it’s just rude .

For some hosts it’s actually worse than rude, it’s hurtful.

Tifical33 · 30/04/2025 22:30

So rude and I'd certainly not have them over again just out of principle. They couldn't eat a mini pizza and breaded chicken and say thank you and appreciate you going to all of the effort? So tacky. I wish that our kiddos played fotbol together!! I'm hungry now!!

Vodkamummy · 01/05/2025 09:51

BeNiceWhenItsFinished · 28/04/2025 21:00

That's more like a party for a 5 year-old.

Show quote history

Well she was acting like one, so maybe that's what she was expecting 😆

Sumthingsweet · 02/05/2025 21:51

Budget is a factor too some people just don’t have the money mind you Aldi and Lidl do cheaper fruit veg etc could make a nice chakuteri or whatever it’s called

HevenlyMeS · 03/05/2025 16:41

Me Too, I still love it despite being strongly advised by My Homeopath to stop to consume wheat products 💚🤗

90sbab8 · 16/05/2025 07:03

that whiny rude child was no Liverpool supporter

I came here to say this! No true Liverpool fan grazes on fruit and veg sticks. Please don't tell me this arsehole lives in Liverpool- id like to think they don't tolerate that shit there...

Sumthingsweet · 16/05/2025 20:10

😂 they might be saving their money for their eyebrows

Pinty · 14/06/2025 12:24

She sounds rude and ungrateful. And it sounds as though her children will be the same.
I'm quite confused about what type of food she expected though! What you offered sounds like perfect buffet food