Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Offended by friend’s comments about party food

807 replies

LinsMum22 · 28/04/2025 20:45

We hosted my friend, her husband and three kids yesterday afternoon. Our sons are in the same football team and we said we’d put some food on at ours after and watch the Liverpool match who they both support. My friend agreed to party style food being the best option as everyone could pick at it as and when.

Amongst other things, there was - Indian selection, tempura prawns, sausage rolls, mini pizza’s, mini sausages, chips, breaded chicken. So a good mix all from Iceland where we’ve had positive comments on the food before.

I could tell my friends’ youngest looked unimpressed when they tried one of the items, and pulled a face to my friend. She made no
attempt to get them to try another item and basically said ‘I know’. I noticed five minutes later she had barely ate anything herself either.

15/20 minutes later, the youngest moaned again and this time my friend said ‘don’t worry, we will stop at McDonald’s on the way back as I’m hungry too.’

I text her after they left to say sorry if they didn’t enjoy the food. She replied to say they didn’t realise it would be that sort of food and that they’d have got something else before coming round if they realised!!

AIBU to find this really snobby and ungrateful? The fact she then took the kids to get a McDonald’s makes no sense!!

OP posts:
Movingonup313 · 28/04/2025 23:57

My kids would have loved your hosting. This "friend" was extremely rude, snobby and unappreciative. If she had expectations to be met then it was on her to ask what you were putting out and then on her to say "I will bring a five bean salad etc etc" so that a dish of her liking were there to compliment what you put out. A friend would never be so rude. I'm pis*ed off for you. She belittled you. She isn't teaching her kids manners or respect. Even if my kids didn't like the food offered they wouldn't behave like that.

Hastentoadd · 28/04/2025 23:58

LinsMum22 · 28/04/2025 20:45

We hosted my friend, her husband and three kids yesterday afternoon. Our sons are in the same football team and we said we’d put some food on at ours after and watch the Liverpool match who they both support. My friend agreed to party style food being the best option as everyone could pick at it as and when.

Amongst other things, there was - Indian selection, tempura prawns, sausage rolls, mini pizza’s, mini sausages, chips, breaded chicken. So a good mix all from Iceland where we’ve had positive comments on the food before.

I could tell my friends’ youngest looked unimpressed when they tried one of the items, and pulled a face to my friend. She made no
attempt to get them to try another item and basically said ‘I know’. I noticed five minutes later she had barely ate anything herself either.

15/20 minutes later, the youngest moaned again and this time my friend said ‘don’t worry, we will stop at McDonald’s on the way back as I’m hungry too.’

I text her after they left to say sorry if they didn’t enjoy the food. She replied to say they didn’t realise it would be that sort of food and that they’d have got something else before coming round if they realised!!

AIBU to find this really snobby and ungrateful? The fact she then took the kids to get a McDonald’s makes no sense!!

She sounds like an idiot, what was she expecting, it was party food / nibbles but she thought Mc Donald’s would be better!?!

IHaveAlwaysLivedintheCastle · 28/04/2025 23:58

What I think of as party food is Parma ham and melon, a few salads, cheese board with chutnies and grapes, hams, hummus, tapenade, coleslaw, baguette, breadsticks, olives…a baked camebert…

That isn't party food. It's "I can't be arsed cooking- are Waitrose or M&. S still open ? Here's my debit card, off you trot because I can't be arsed to go there" food. There's nothing in that list that shouts "Party Time !!!"

HellDorado · 29/04/2025 00:06

User8375159534 · 28/04/2025 21:36

Tbh I wouldn't host with Iceland food but I'm pretty sure my parents would. Maybe hide the wrappers next time!

Or invite better people.

theunbreakablecleopatrajones · 29/04/2025 00:08

I wouldn’t have been too keen on quite such a random frozen selection - I think you maybe want to pick a continent and then provide some colour in the form of veg to go with it

but, a) there is no excuse to be rude when someone has provided food for you

and b) McDonalds is no better

whynotwhatknot · 29/04/2025 00:17

id say to her tomorrow enjoy your maccy ds last night nothing like a healthy dinner

rude bitch

Funnywonder · 29/04/2025 00:18

Jesus Christ Almighty God. It doesn’t matter what anyone thinks party food SHOULD be. There was simply no call for this woman to be so rude. Typical Mumsnet. Posters queuing up to distance themselves from the peasant food just in case anyone thinks agreeing the friend is rude infers that they would ever eat anything from an Iceland freezer.

Sugarnspicenallthingsnaice · 29/04/2025 00:20

theunbreakablecleopatrajones · 29/04/2025 00:08

I wouldn’t have been too keen on quite such a random frozen selection - I think you maybe want to pick a continent and then provide some colour in the form of veg to go with it

but, a) there is no excuse to be rude when someone has provided food for you

and b) McDonalds is no better

Sums it up nicely.

That sort of food doesn't appeal to me at all but if I'd been your guest you'd have never known it!

You did a nice thing hosting them OP, and she's an arsehole.

PyongyangKipperbang · 29/04/2025 00:22

theunbreakablecleopatrajones · 29/04/2025 00:08

I wouldn’t have been too keen on quite such a random frozen selection - I think you maybe want to pick a continent and then provide some colour in the form of veg to go with it

but, a) there is no excuse to be rude when someone has provided food for you

and b) McDonalds is no better

Its an afternoon of two families watching a footie game. Are you seriously saying you would pick a cuisine and then colour co-ordinate the crudites?!

snackatack · 29/04/2025 00:23

Some people are needlessly snobs. The breaded chicken fillets (if cooked right) are delicious and far nicer than any other.

My MIL is just as snobby - for the past 6 years she has complemented our artisan Christmas cake I get from the posh bakery (that's right the Iceland one we put in a Christmas tin!)

PyongyangKipperbang · 29/04/2025 00:24

Sugarnspicenallthingsnaice · 29/04/2025 00:20

Sums it up nicely.

That sort of food doesn't appeal to me at all but if I'd been your guest you'd have never known it!

You did a nice thing hosting them OP, and she's an arsehole.

Show quote history

Would you have wine pairings?

Or would the random lagers that they almost certainly drank, be ok with you?

InWalksBarberalla · 29/04/2025 00:24

Mmhmmn · 28/04/2025 22:22

Some people really, really don’t go for beige food but it doesn’t make much sense to then go for a McDonald’s. And they sound really rude.
It’s always worth chucking together a big bowl of salad, nothing fancy required, just some nice salad leaves, tomato, cucumber, feta cheese, pepper. And Google is your friend for ideas for healthier but tasty party food.

Did you miss the bit about watching the footy with the kids after their football match. Nobody expects a big salad in front of the football - around here it would be party pies and sausage rolls.

JackieDaytonaLuckyBrews · 29/04/2025 00:26

Funnywonder · 29/04/2025 00:18

Jesus Christ Almighty God. It doesn’t matter what anyone thinks party food SHOULD be. There was simply no call for this woman to be so rude. Typical Mumsnet. Posters queuing up to distance themselves from the peasant food just in case anyone thinks agreeing the friend is rude infers that they would ever eat anything from an Iceland freezer.

I know, it's absolutely ridiculous. I actually did laugh out loud at some of the menu suggestions (which were never asked for) and comments about NEVER being able to each such rubbish (which were not relevant). It's another version of the competitive under eating 'what have you eaten today' threads where everyone has to outdo each other.

TheHerboriste · 29/04/2025 00:26

Party food: I would expect fresh. Crudités, fruit, fresh bread and cheese. Nuts. Not microwave frozen stuff.

Mumtobabyhavoc · 29/04/2025 00:26

Maybe the mum and one dc don't really care for breaded/fried appetizer-type foods? She could've asked which items you planned, specifically, and offered to add to it and bring a fruit/veggie platter and a salad. Regardless, she was rude. I wouldn't delve deeper, though. Her dh and other dc tucked it. Good enough.

eta I'd happily and gratefully pop by for anything you're serving for a chance to hang out in front of the tv. If I don't have to cook I'm in! 😋

Funnywonder · 29/04/2025 00:27

InWalksBarberalla · 29/04/2025 00:24

Did you miss the bit about watching the footy with the kids after their football match. Nobody expects a big salad in front of the football - around here it would be party pies and sausage rolls.

Show quote history

Yeah, football and a BIG salad. The classic pairing.

BankHolidayBonanza · 29/04/2025 00:29

TheHerboriste · 29/04/2025 00:26

Party food: I would expect fresh. Crudités, fruit, fresh bread and cheese. Nuts. Not microwave frozen stuff.

shock horror someone added a pizza! 😂

BankHolidayBonanza · 29/04/2025 00:30

Funnywonder · 29/04/2025 00:27

Yeah, football and a BIG salad. The classic pairing.

Show quote history

it's not a big salad, it's individual colourful salads served in tasteful crystal ramequins. Where are your manners.

CarpetKnees · 29/04/2025 00:31

TheHerboriste · 29/04/2025 00:26

Party food: I would expect fresh. Crudités, fruit, fresh bread and cheese. Nuts. Not microwave frozen stuff.

You obviously go to different parties from me.

However what you (or I) might have expected is irrelevant.
If someone is kind enough to invite you to their house, to watch their Sky TV so the dc could watch it together, and then, on top of that provides you with food, you either eat it or apologise profusely about your fussiness.

hoarahloux · 29/04/2025 00:31

They rejected frozen party food from Iceland in favour of McDonalds 😂

Funnywonder · 29/04/2025 00:31

TheHerboriste · 29/04/2025 00:26

Party food: I would expect fresh. Crudités, fruit, fresh bread and cheese. Nuts. Not microwave frozen stuff.

Well that’s just plain ignorant. Iceland party food goes in the oven. Not the microwave. Er … so a friend told me.

hoarahloux · 29/04/2025 00:32

TheHerboriste · 29/04/2025 00:26

Party food: I would expect fresh. Crudités, fruit, fresh bread and cheese. Nuts. Not microwave frozen stuff.

I mean, if microwave frozen stuff wasn't to your taste, would you then stop off at Maccy D's on your way home? Or would Waitrose be your preference for your crudités?

BethDuttonYeHaw · 29/04/2025 00:33

its not like you slaved away making home cooked food from scratch. It’s just frozen food you bunged in the oven.

She didn’t like the food. No need to be offended.

TheHerboriste · 29/04/2025 00:34

hoarahloux · 29/04/2025 00:32

I mean, if microwave frozen stuff wasn't to your taste, would you then stop off at Maccy D's on your way home? Or would Waitrose be your preference for your crudités?

Show quote history

At least McDonald’s offers wraps and salads.

SouthLondonMum22 · 29/04/2025 00:38

BethDuttonYeHaw · 29/04/2025 00:33

its not like you slaved away making home cooked food from scratch. It’s just frozen food you bunged in the oven.

She didn’t like the food. No need to be offended.

There was no need for her friend to be rude.