To have been rude to shop assistant

[Mumoftwo52]

Family doing some shopping today. Go into an independent toy shop. I’m holding DD1 (18m) so she doesn’t pull everything off shelves, 4yo DD runs ahead and picks up a unicorn Jellycat and cuddles it saying ‘can I get this please mummy?’. Shop assistant shouts across the room ‘can she put that back if you’re not going to buy it as it’s expensive’. Me and DH exchange glances but I tell DD to put it back.

We keep browsing but I say to DH that I don’t really fancy buying anything now, and say quite loudly in front of the second shop assistant (who turns out to be the owner): ‘let’s go and find another toy shop where we’re allowed to touch the toys’. Yes I was being snarky but was annoyed.

She says these toys are expensive, she owns all the stock so if my DD damages it, it costs her money. I say I’d understand that if she had dirty hands, she doesn’t. I wouldn’t let her touch anything if she did. DH says it’s a shame kids aren’t allowed to touch toys in a toy shop, and that she’s lost a potential sale, she says that they've had bad experiences in the past and anyway it was clear we weren’t going to buy anything. I said ‘why do you think that?’ She replied: ‘it just is’. We quickly left.

AIBU for letting my kids touch toys in a toy shop? To be clear, this was a soft toy, not something delicate. My DD was holding it in her arms, nothing more.

sadly, that attitude is the reason why no shop at driving distance from my home has any playhouse on display. They have sheds, garden rooms and so on, but playhouses: none.

because too many parents confuse them with a playground and the shops had had enough.

And people wonder why they're not welcome in some previous friends houses any longer!

Haha oh dear your poor 18mo children.

Exactly a shop, not a crèche.

Well if you think the parent was being a total cock those are your words. I would say they were not parenting. Trying to be friends with kids these days doesn't work.

Well the parent needed telling to parent. The child needed telling to have manners. So yes there was a need as both were not behaving properly.

My mum would have had the legs from under me if I touched anything in a shop! Toy or otherwise.

As she should.

You're not very nice, are you?

And funnily enough all those teachers will take them on trips and guess how many will touch in the gift shop? None despite there being 30 of them together!

Because the teachers will tell them and make sure they do not. It can be done with effort. Something that is lacking in many homes these days. Parenting is a dying art.

After this outburst it's plain to see your children are going to grow up to be rude, entitled little brats who are not pleasant to be around.
FYI, teaching children to behave properly in public places and letting them be children are not mutually exclusive. Children do not need to be able to roam around everywhere, touching whatever they like, and annoying other people.
It's irrelevant what year it is, it isn't old fashioned to expect high standards of behaviour from children and reinforce it.
Letting your children behave badly won't do them any favours, they'll just turn out to be rude, entitled adults...

No.

Couldn't have said this better myself. Perfect! I agree with every word. A parent who can't be arsed to parent then uses every excuse under the sun to suggest she doesn't need to. Putting parents down who actually do bother and want their children to grow up into decent, respectful adults is pathetic and deflection because they were called out.

Well done to all the parents on this thread who do a good job teaching manners to their children.

’Not very nice’ for worrying about your 18mo who is already trained not to reach for lovely toys? Yeah, I’m not the red flag.

None of mine would EVER be allowed to touch in a toy shop. We went to look, if we had birthday money to spend we considered what was affordable, and if we really wanted it THEN it was lifted from the shelf to go and pay. If there was nothing that was really wanted we simply left the shop. No tantrums no noise.

People have eyes. In a shop you use those eyeballs to look at the toys. You can see them perfectly. Then you use your mouth to ask if you can have it or not. You are told yes or no. Then you use your legs to walk away.

Eyes, mouth, legs used no touching needed. Got it? It is wonder you have got to this age without knowing how to go into a shop and look!

Dickish behaviour on both sides.

Something about Jellycat toys specifically though - they’re shoplifter magnets. They’re targeted by shoplifters to the point one major seller very nearly made the decision to stop stocking them completely. I’m not suggesting you or your DC were intending to steal anything: just that I know some places can get very twitchy about them if they’ve had a load stolen 🤷‍♀️

Not very nice because you know I can't have children. If you bothered to read the thread. Which surely you did before throwing flagrant comments around? Which makes you, on reflection, pretty despicable actually.

But an 18 month old grabbing something isn't "bad behaviour". You're just being horrible to the OP for no reason.

Teach your child to look without touching

Oh the irony... read the thread.

No irony here. You're just nasty.

its a child of course they have potential to wreck the item, and especially the cost of them

No, I'm not. You don't think the OP has said appalling things to me? My conscience is clear.

This is exactly what I say to DS

Speak for yourself, my 4yo’s weren’t snotty or sticky. Maybe wash your kids?

I thought half term finished last week?