Uncomfortable comment from a work colleague I don’t know

[JenJen94]

I’m a bit unsure how to feel after a comment made to me this morning - whether it’s right I’m creeped out or if I’m over-reacting.

Without being too outing, I work at the head office for a big national company so several thousand employees on site across the week and obviously I don’t know everyone.

I usually park in the same spot every morning (in office 3 days a week) and quite often a man is parked a few spots along who will start at a similar time to me. I don’t know him, never see him in the office or know what department he’s in etc.

Today, he was parked up before me but I saw he was sat in his car when I arrived. I got my stuff out and began to walk to the office. I heard him get out of his car about 15/20 seconds after I walked past.

I got stuck behind someone at the entrance to the office and he had caught up by that point. He said to me ‘got your legs out today then’ as I was wearing a skirt given the hot weather.

I smiled/sheepishly laughed and walked on into the office.

Is this creepy given I don’t know this person or is it just me?

You have big tits could also be a factual comment.

Nothing wrong with that.

Wouldn’t fuss me.

Oh, I said this to my postman today 🙈

I didn’t mean anything by it!

I said the same thing to a female colleague & a male colleague in shorts today

Maybe he likes her and was waiting for an opportunity to speak to her? Sounds like a busy work car park during the day. Then mucked it up by saying something silly.

Can you imagine a man writing about it on a male/dads forum - can you imagine the response?

It's a fairly standard comment between friends I would say. Its a bit odd for a man to say this to a woman he doesn't know and has never spoken to. Nice day today would ve been better.
But as a one off I'd hope he's just a bit awkward and afterwards wondered why he said it.

This is it, isn’t it. It wouldn’t be so odd if it came from a stranger who was a woman but from a man it is off and we don’t need to spell out why.

Mmm, this would make me feel a little bit uncomfortable too mainly because you/he don’t know each other. It’s a little bit flirty - just a tad and the previous poster is right, he wouldn’t have said it to a man. He could have just said something like ‘beautiful weather today’ if he wanted to start a conversation.

I met the postman who delivers to my work in town one day. He normally only sees me when I'm sitting behind a desk. I said "Hi", he did a double-take, then laughed and said "I didn't recognize you with the legs"!!!!

Yeah, it's pretty cringe and off sounding.
Surely men know not to talk to women about parts of their body being exposed or not?
Should one respond with 'Yeah, in this weather surely you should give your balls a bit of an airing and also wear a skirt'?!

I'd definitely earmark him as a creep.
I just hope he doesn't walk in tomorrow and introduce himself as your new line manager!

If he does say such things again, tell him it's inappropriate. Then if he continues speak to HR. But hopefully it won't come to that?

Is there a receptionist or front desk person you're friendly with who might know who he is? And you could ask what they thought of him? They're bound to know something if they speak to all the staff every day.

I'd find it a bit gross OP. Surprised by other responses here, from all the gals who enjoy randoms remarking on their bodies and think it's a super friendly thing to do.

I don’t think I’d feel particularly uncomfortable exactly, but I would think he was being weird and a bit creepy. Maybe at best an awkward blurt. It’s a fine normal comment between friends, but as an opening line when he’s never spoken to you before? He’d go right down in my estimation and I’d make initial guess as potential creepy sleaze.

Poor menz

If I was younger and he was not creepy I wouldn’t have minded (as long as it didn’t become a habit, assuming I didn’t fancy him). I did have great legs so I got constant remarks in those days.

Roll on a few decades and I just want to be invisible (probably trauma related, but not se*ual trauma). So now I wouldn’t like it at all.

About 2 weeks ago on a hot day I eore a lighter weight uniform t-shirt to work, they have slightly shorter sleeves, someone commented I was 'showing more skin than normal ' I absolutely was not offended by it , it was a fact and a observation.

If it had been accompanied by more personal comments or whether I should or shouldn't dress like that they would of been put in their place but I just said ' you should try it too'

I definitely wouldn’t feel uncomfortable with this, he doesn’t sound creepy at all to me! I think you’re BU.

Same here.

but IRL I don't think people overthink stuff like they do on here!!

Exactly!

Your arse wobbles when you walk.

FUCK OFF

Oh settle down, petal. There are loads of reasons he may have got out of his car after she did let me help you with a few....

Talking on his phone
Listening to the end of something on the radio
Drinking his coffee
....

It’s definitely a comment that shows he’s noticed you and has been observing. It’s something that really should be said to someone familiar with not someone you’ve never spoken to so I think it was inappropriate.

A few months ago, I attended a course called "managing banter" and this is the sort of thing that was covered. At lot of what we discussed was about how the comment was received and the relationship between the two people. If you knew each other and he had made that joke, you might have passed it off and laughed along. But you don't know him, he doesn't know you or your history / sense of humour and so its perfectly valid to feel uncomfortable. Do you want to do anything about it?

I have a relatively high tolerance for ‘banter’ from male colleagues, but I find this a bit creepy.

I’m surprised so many people aren’t bothered by it.

he doesn’t know you, and as pps have said he wouldn’t say that to a guy. He could also have just said something about the weather.

if I was feeling generous I’d just think it was an awkward and clumsy attempt to strike up a conversation. He also probably fancies you ( which isn’t against the law), but I think you are perfectly reasonable to find it a bit creepy.

i think context is important. He doesn’t know you. Also - is there a big age gap?

As a post woman who wears shorts unless it's snowing or below 0 degrees, I get lots of comments from men and women about my legs! It's not personal or weird, just a casual comment. Next time day something like "it's pretty warm,where's your shorts?!"