The utter despair of losing something

[kindnessforthewin]

I realised I had misplaced brand new expensive sunglasses today, around mid morning, I just thought I hadn’t seen them in a while, so checked the last place I remember having them (the car).

DH almost 100% I brought them un as we know not to leave anything in the car.

When we arrived at a soft play (of all places) I took them off and left in central reservation of car as I didn’t want to take them in. That was 10 days ago, I just knew they weren’t in the house as I’d have seen them. I have a couple pairs and just got stuck on the other pair recently, as you do.

I don’t understand it at all. It’s ruined the entire day. Taken over. I can’t stop wondering where they have gone.

anyone else get obsessive like this?

I’ve looked high and low this morning. Right under seats in car, all over the car and so had DH, they’re definitely not in there.

I’ve been through every cupboard, coat, shoe, bag for life, bag for that matter. Every room. My memory is pretty good and if I’d had them, I’d know.

there have even been tears of frustration as places to look have run out. I’ve cried my tears and ready to move on. They came in a huge beautiful box and sturdy, well structured dust bag which is a case in itself. I’m sure there is a second hand market for both of these items, either those who have lost theirs or people trying to flog knock offs, which makes me second guess if I should help those people. Either way, I think j could recoup a bit of money from selling those and seeing the case and bag just make me more annoyed at myself.

I was careless. I should have carefully removed them from the car and carefully put them back in their bag and back in the case. Then I’d not have lost them.

the only saving grace is i found my gym band I lost a week ago, which has been annoying to get into the gym without. I also found DH heart monitor he likes to wear running. I decided to really take care of my other valuables and have a system for my jewellery now, they’re all in their boxes in one basket and by going through cupboards I’ve made so much space for toys, which was on the to do list.

now to tidy away the rest of the remnants of this morning, bedroom and hallway need a bit more work.

@menopausalmarei agree, i am a complete control freak. It’s the not knowing too. I can’t stand not knowing how they disappeared.

Yes these were very expensive glasses by Chanel. I’ve only ever bought not designer or Raybans which aren’t cheap but not this level expensive. Of course I’ve never lost a pair, ever. Broken, yes, but not lost. I have 6 other pairs I’ve bought over the past 12 or so years. Of course it’s just this one pair. That’s what makes me suspicious that someone else has fancied them.

Have you looked under the car seats @kindnessforthewin ?

For those losing AirPods, “find my” on an iPhone will locate them.

I never ever lock my van (live somewhere extremely rural), and not once has one of my sacks of well rotted manure gone missing.

We came straight home and with two DCs, a couple shopping bags, it was quite chaotic. DH is sure he reminded me many times to take them out but I have no memory of that or taking them out. I personally went through new clothes for DC1, we o my buy him the next size up once a season so I carefully put them away and threw away shopping bag.

after putting DCs to bed, I did drive to newsagents, sent 2 parcels, had to drive home to print a label which DH printed out for me and ran out to car then went and sent other parcel. I think I possibly totally by accident didn’t lock the car when park outside newsagents and maybe left them on show?

we’ve had 2 different cleaners the last 2 weeks as our usual one is away. The first one was working that same day we got back from soft play, so not impossible she swept them up with rubbish she was taking out perhaps? She left about 30-45 min after we got back. Not impossible she took them or misplaced them as I genuinely never saw them after that Wednesday.

I don’t think cleaner who was here this week has moved them as I don’t recall seeing them. The house can get quite chaotic but I don’t lost things so everytime I need sunglasses I picked up the nearest pair and didn’t think anything of it.

the only other places I went were physio on Thursday but I had a bag with me and I didn’t have them. Friday I took DCs and dog for a walk, again I wouldn’t have gone out with them and back without them without realising. I loved those glasses and really would have remembered having them.

they went missing that Wednesday. Either from the car when I dropped deliveries, cleaner took them out with rubbish somehow in the chaos of us getting home and her leaving.

i honestly think I stupidly left them in car and somehow when bringing everyone in or dropping parcels someone has swiped them. We’ve had lots of things taken from the car over the years. 8 years ago we lived about 10 min away and we could hear people going up and down the road trying car doors at night, around the same time we had someone’s laptop bag land in our front garden and when we found a business card the owner said he’d left it in DBs car over night as he was visiting for work. Also around the same time I was in a hurry going away for a weekend and I flagged to DH I couldn’t remember locking car and he confirmed I left it unlocked and the shoes I had in the boot to return to the shop had been taken. Since living here, a very middle class area of London, we’ve had 2 cars stolen (key relay entry the first time and signal blocked the second time and car engine started by another device), we had rain coats stolen from the car, again accidentally probably left unlocked but we don’t keep valuables in the car but they will take anything. Neighbours have ring doorbell footage of a man going up and down trying car doors. Could very well be him. We are so careful to lock the car but going in and out with DCs unloading the car can take a while - we live in terrace housing. Parcels are stolen frequently from doorsteps.

the other possibility is I dropped them as I got out of car. But I’d like to think I’d have heard them.

Annoyingly ring door bell subscription just ran out and we renewed it but no past footage from the past few weeks without it.

As a small child I went to my dad’s work Christmas party. We had a bag of toffees that I lost somewhere along the way. I know it sounds quite ridiculous but I mourned the loss of the toffees that I didn’t even like for several years.

That’s heartbreaking and even worse is that you know for 100% certainly it was there and someone helped themselves.

Yes thoroughly and so has DH

Welcome to the past 24 hours of my weekend. Absolutely everything has gone on hold. It’s a rare morning we don’t leave the house. I feel I’ve wasted all my gym energy looking. Still might go for a swim when DCs go down to take my mind off everything.

I once got an email from a clothing brand to say I'd included my glasses in a return I'd sent to them, no idea and I'd been searching for them for days. Any chance they've ended up in your parcels or in the rubbish from DCs new clothes?

I packaged up and sealed the parcels before we left, so definitely not in there as I was wearing glasses on way to soft play. I have also thought about the clothes bag, I don’t remember throwing it away but I remember getting all the clothes out one by one. It was chaotic when we arrived home as the clothes just sat on top the wine rack in a bag until we were back from Easter. It’d be pretty careless to if they were thrown away with them.

I would feel the same as you, OP and hope you find them.

yes absolutely hate loosing things and can get obsessive about finding the lost item. I thought it was just me that was like that as I've had friends lose expensive, often sentimental stuff and they've just shrugged it off and said oh well. whereas I'd be in bits and could settle until it's found.

They retail in Chanel for £320 but DH has found them for £270 from another online sunglasses shop. I wonder if he will rebuy them for me for a birthday or something. I just can’t believe they’ve gone. I’ve seen the exact same pair listed only yesterday on Vinted, without the nice box and sleeve so I assume they are either fake or stolen. I asked if she had authentication or receipts and she said no. On for £130. Makes me feel better the second hand market doesn’t fetch as much.

Also generally annoyed that DH has been making cut backs recently, had to ask him to re subscribe to Nest doorbell so we have footage again. Been a few weeks without for the first time in years and we have a camera in our hallway on the same subscription. At least I would have clearly seen if I had them the day we got back. He said he went to do it and it looked different so left it but I remember him saying we don’t need it anymore. £60 for a year..

Reading in a hotel room I've now got to get up and check where my sunglasses are. I absolutely hate loosing things really plays on my mind

Could they be in a different handbag you maybe switched and forgot ? I found a pair of my husband's glasses in my bag a year later. Also once found some he had balanced on a bamboo plant support for runner beans

I'm an expert at losing things. It drives me batty. It's probably the thing that annoys me most about myself.

I’ve checked every single bag. Tbh I don’t really have lots of bags. One day bag that is cross body and small, then a larger bucket style over the shoulder bag. I only use a different one if I’m going out in the evening which is a rare event I will tell you :)

Glad you found your husbands glasses though ! @endofthecorridoor

Could the ones on Vinted be yours? If they were stolen or you left them at the soft play and someone picked them up? Suspicious that they don’t have the box etc.

@Peridot1its crossed my mind, I just don’t have anyway of proving it.