Cheap chocolate and presents from MIL

[nottheplan]

Mil and dhs family always buy rubbish presents and easter chocolate for our dcs. We're talking rotten own brand chocolate that nobody likes. It just gets chucked in the bin. Also cheap plastic toys from b&m in the 2 for £20 offer for birthdays and Christmas. Always break into pieces and get chucked in the bin. They are most definitely not poor. Wibu to ask them not to buy anymore for our dcs? If I phrase it that they have too much already and were trying to cut down on toys and treats?

Cadburys don’t get a mention. Lidl and Aldi both do.

https://www.theguardian.com/food/2025/mar/23/i-could-eat-the-lot-the-best-new-easter-eggs-for-2025

You cba to explain?

Sounds a bit lazy to me.

That sounds very snobby 😐

Give the chocolate away on Olio, or make chocolate crispy cornflakes cakes/cookies.
There is nothing wrong with the 2 for 20 toys in B&M. But either sell for cheap on Vinted or give away on Olio.

YABVU and ungrateful. Perhaps that’s the only shop they can get to/afford. Some people disagree with being constantly ripped off by branded stuff.

I would be incredibly hurt if somebody asked me to stop buying gifts for them, especially in the future as a Grandmother. I can imagine it brings GPs a great deal of pleasure to give to their GCs. Picture yourself as a future GM and being asked that 🙀 what type of GP wouldn’t buy these gifts for their GC?!

My 2 children only have 1 GP alive out of a possible 4 and would be so delighted to see them/receive any chocolate or gift from them.

The polite response to receiving any gift from anyone is to smile and say thank you. If you then must re-gift or donate it, do it quietly and tactfully, whilst always reiterating to your children how kind it is for anybody to buy them anything.

You and your kids sound like insufferable snobs. Whatever happened to ‘Be Kind?’ Why are you trying to bring your children up to be be rude and ungrateful to their grandparents?

My late FIL asked me for ideas on what to get my eldest for his first birthday. He went with my suggestion (which was based on what DS was showing an interest in) spent a seemingly outrageous and extravagant 30 pounds 😱 and 5 years later that toy is still in active service, being used by youngest as well as our neighbours kids! DS remembers who bought him it, which is lovely as FIL is no longer with us.
By contrast, MIL gifts whatever nonsense she can find on sale. Mountains of it. Whether it’s age appropriate/decent quality/in any way relevant to her grandchildren’s interests is entirely not the point. It’s not about them, it’s about her enjoying a bargain hunt. Couldn’t tell you how much tat has come and gone from her while that carefully chosen, slightly more expensive toy bought by FIL goes on and on.
Also, I used to buy the Aldi chocolate for kids stockings as I think the packaging is very sweet, but kids think it’s rotten and I agree. So it’s one Lindt Santa now which they enjoy very much. And I love an Aldi brand swap as much as the next person so it’s not snobbery, it’s preference.
So I’m team OP 🙌 you’ve had a hard time on this thread but I totally understand your frustration.

Own brand chocolate is not necessarily rubbish. I tend to buy Aldi's plain chocolate range, which is as good as Green and Black's and miles, miles better than Cadburys, which I never buy. Your iLs probably enjoy buying things for the GC, perhaps a series of small delights as they collect gifts over the year. Just because you don't like these things doesn't mean your DC don't enjoy them. And what do you know about iL's finances? They are having to pay high energy bills etc. now, after all (and have for everal years) and their money may not stretch as far as you think it does. Gifts given with love are gifts for which thanks are due.

Love it 🤣

Well, Cadburys is rubbish since it was taken over by an American firm, which changed the recipe, so I avoid it. I try not to buy Nestle chocolate because that firm used to 'donate' baby milk to hospitals in developing countries in order to encourage mothers to artificially feed babies instead of breastfeeding, which resulted in malnourished babies (milk was too expensive) and ill-health. If your MiL is my generation she may feel the same about that company.
Aldi do excellent chocolate which is inexpensive - a range of solidly chocolate chocolate 90% cacao solids, down to a good range of good-tasting milk and white chocolate - made by Moser Roth.
£20 for a present to a GC is my limit, as it happens. I have 9 children to cater for and consider that is quite enough for a present - usually books (esp as some must be posted).

I think @CurlewKate was being sarcastic.

This 100%

It's considerably better than Cadburys these days. She could teach her children to appreciate proper chocolate - which both Aldi and Lidl sell.

Since Cadbury's was sold it's become awful due to excessive quantities of vegetable oil. The EU has a strict definition of chocolate Lidl bunnies comply with.

The recipes changed when they were bought and they even lost their royal warrant last year.

Wonder where they got that attitude from. It's a comple mystery.

I know

it all sounds a bit ungrateful to me! How old are your kids that they break toys. (Genuine question) as I am buying toys at the moment from stores as such (mostly educational) and they seem fine!

My kids are at the age where they won’t eat cheap chocolate. They call it cupboard chocolate as they say it tastes like it’s been in a cupboard for ages. They can definitely tell the difference. I can tell different brands as well. I’m not a fan of nestle for example. Don’t like the taste. Prefer mars (galaxy) and Cadbury’s. One child prefers dark chocolate as well. None of us like white chocolate but we made that into something this time. We all also struggle eating Thornton’s. Very sickly. Also tends to get left.

Oh my goodness, listen to yourself! Everyone has different taste preferences. If OP’s children prefer a certain brand of chocolate over another, that’s absolutely fine! It not essential that we all eat and appreciate the same things 😂😂

Teach your children -and yourself- to be thankful for any gifts at all. What's wrong with cheap chocolate and toys? If you don't like them, donate them, unopened or not.

Personally, I like “own brand “ chocolate!!! It’s much nicer than Cadburys, usually!

I do think Parents/In laws come in for a lot of stick on here for their choices.

Whatever happened to accepting gracefully?
Just because you think it’s inferior, they (grandparents) maybe don’t have that opinion, and if they have several sets of grandchildren, it is probably a sensible decision. How can a child feel ‘unloved’ by not getting an upmarket one?…Unless you tell them that it doesn’t have the same worth?
It will still have been bought with love. Same for plastic toys…just because you think it ‘rat’, doesn’t make it any less wanted. Even expensive toys don’t necessarily get played with beyond a few minutes!!

“Tat” not “rat” 🙄

Cadburys cocoa content is so low its only just considered chocolate and tastes foul. That aside dont compare presents from grandparents it's not a competition. Once they put in their time to get to know and love your children that's all that matters.

Hand on heart - be honest...are you sure you haven't influenced your children with your own opinion of the gifts. Even if you haven't done it on purpose. Children are amazing at picking up on parents true feelings. You should have welcomed the gifts and encouraged your children to show their appreciation for them. A gift is still a gift. So many threads I could unpick but like a lot of posts we only get the bare bones to form an opinion on so there could be so much more to this than just unwelcome gifts. So for instance what is your relationship like with MIL apart from this example. What does you DH think. Does your attitude hurt his feelings - it is his Mum you are criticising after all. I would encourage your children to appreciate ALL gifts no matter how inexpensive they might be. It will make them nicer people.And even if she is doing this on purpose to be nasty you could show her you are the nicer person here by you and the children being happy with the gifts.

Absolutely spot on. I detect a bit of ‘ my parents are better than yours’ here.