To think my friend overreacted? Air BNB situation

[userfriendly55]

The weekend before last my friend and I went to London to see a show and have a bit of a girly weekend, we do this quite often. I have an airbnb account, she doesn’t, so I usually book an airbnb (after consulting with her) and she pays me half.

I am quite fastidious with cleaning them as I don’t want to lose my rating, so we always make sure the place is spotless before we leave.

The place we stayed in was a 1 bedroom maisonette but spread over 2 floors. We agreed I would have the bedroom as I have a chronic health condition. She slept downstairs on the sofa bed. There was an upstairs bathroom and downstairs toilet. All happy with this when we booked.

We were getting ready to leave on the Sunday and we had all cleaned up. Literally about to go out the door. My friend said she needed to use the toilet before we left and went to go upstairs. I asked her why she was going upstairs, and she said the downstairs toilet wasn’t flushing properly, and she was on her period. I told her not to go upstairs because I had just checked/cleaned the bathroom upstairs and didn’t want to have to do it again. She got annoyed and we had a bit of a discussion before she conceded and used the downstairs toilet after I told her that she’d have to flush it a couple of times.

We left and all was fine but she has been a bit off with me since in our conversations. We had a good time and haven’t argued about anything else this is the only thing that there was an issue about. So it must be the toilet thing that she is cross about ?

Was I unreasonable??

You receive disability benefit for an en-suite bedroom on holidays, one that only you are capable of cleaning? (Being facetious)

Any way that's besides the point, you're making out that your friend wouldn't clean up a bathroom if she made a mess - YAB sooo U!

If I was your friend I wouldn't go with you again.

Yes, I doubt you'll encounter this issue again unless you come to your senses and apologise, genuinely.

I’d certainly be rethinking the entire friendship if I were your poor friend. You sound self centred, unpleasant and controlling, I can’t imagine treating my friends like this.

Classic Mumsnet bullying pile on going on here.

You are bossy and controlling. What's the difference between you checking the upstairs toilet and checking the downstairs toilet?. . You seem to see her as your subordinate and you are refusing to see this

Classic OP asking AIBU, MN says Yes. OP says.... No I'm not, waaah, waaah, waaah 😩😫😠

Of both toilets had been cleaned and checked and you would need to re clean whichever she used - why does it matter to you which one she used?

Very odd and extremely controlling.

Plus I’m sure she could clean it herself if needed.

just because it’s your account you feel you should pay equal for one do you to have a sofa bed downstairs - don’t agree with that either.

You’re not much of an equal friend and I’d be apologising and rectifying my behaviour in future or you may not remain friends for much longer.

Yeah, totally unreasonable and controlling. Even if you are super fastidious you could have crept up to the bedroom to check bathroom was clean to your standard. You don’t try to stop someone using the loo they want to use. You probably humiliated her.

Yabu.
She's an adult and wanted some privacy and your scolded her like a child

Yes you were unreasonable. As a grown woman she should get to choose where she’d rather use the toilet.
I wouldn’t have given in.
im capable of using a toilet without leaving it a mess!

By that do you mean that posters are of the same mind and are voicing their opinion? That's literally the point of AIBU, it's not even a situation where anyone is likely to agree with the OP in the first place

Classic ‘noone agrees with the OP but the OP is doubling down’, you mean?

Its "bullying" to disagree with someone who literally asked AIBU and say that they would have found her actions offensive (which personally I would have)?

LOL. Right.

You sound like a massively unpleasant control freak. Obviously you can’t tell people what to do like that! Bloody hell.

It’s ok to disagree with the OP but I find a lot of the language being used quite bullying in tone.

Bullying

You have a very good and patient friend. I suggest you treat her like an adult let her use the toilet she wishes in future.

It was rude to imply she would leave a gross loo. I also don’t understand why you were stressing about your rating with her messing the upstairs loo but not the downstairs? If it’s all one property one messy loo will drop your rating whichever one it was. Yabvvu

You could argue that policing someone about where they can go to the toilet is also "bullying".

YABVU and were awful to your friend. She will likely rethink these mini breaks with you now @userfriendly55

Bullying?!? I don't think you know what that means. OP came on here voluntarily with her ridiculous tale asking if she was being unreasonable.

Bullying

I don’t reckon this story is even true, would imagine the poster has posted this just to sit and enjoy the replies.

Did you even let this friend use the main bathroom for a shower/brushing teeth/getting ready? If I paid half for you to get the bed and bathroom and to not even be able to take a shower myself and then be told I can’t use a toilet I would never speak to you again. You sound unhinged and that an air bnb rating means more to you than your friendship.

You were unreasonable and controlling. Surely whatever toilet she used you would want it to be clean? Made no odds which toilet she used, except for some weird control by you.