Man in the park calling a baby sexy - aibu to consider reporting?

[Wiltingasparagusfern]

Just that really. A man in the playground kept singing SEXY at a baby (like that liberty X song tune) and also saying “are you a sexy girl? Are you going to be a sexy girl! SEXY!” Think she was his granddaughter. Her dad was also there.

Didn’t say anything as I was on my own, but there were other parents there too. He was doing it repeatedly. Left the park feeling nauseated and just wondering if it was some yucky family in-joke but well what if he’s abusing that baby or other children? Don’t know his name but know they are local and the baby’s name. Baby was between a year and 18 months I would say.

It was so ODD. I don’t know if it’s reportable or how that would work so please do advise. I have never come across something like this in my life!

My kids aren’t sexy

they’re beautiful, handsome, funny, clever, annoying etc

my partner is sexy

Tom hardy is sexy (sadly not my partner…)

I find it proper weird people calling their kids sexy.

This is so weird!
Also all the replies saying ‘I hate it when someone calls a child sexy!’ WTF I’ve never heard this ever and would be disgusted and have to say ‘sorry what?!’

People are rank. In my dc school, parents kissed their children on the mouth saying goodbye at the gates. It was vomit-inducing. In front of everyone. And a while back on MN there were nutters posting that their husbands bathe with their toddlers, not in swimming trunks, with their dicks hanging out. At the school gates I mentioned it to other parents a few times, as I called out the weirdoes bathing with their toddlers on MN. Guess who got flamed? Me. So all you can do is just be disgusted, that is all, I am afraid.

It does sound jarring, but I thought it was one of those “funny because it's obviously not true" terms of endearment? Eg calling all your cherished friends bitches, or calling a very skinny person fatty. Usually trying to be funny?
I wouldn't be yelling it out in the playground myself but I wouldn't be jumping to any conclusions either.

I've heard this twice - once from a female and once from a male, both referring to their own children. It really made me feel sick to hear it. I think it's a totally gross way to speak about a child. I don't know why they think it's acceptable.

@Wiltingasparagusfern Wow! Like you OP, I've never heard anyone calling a baby "sexy" - that's beyond inappropriate - it's repugnant and I can barely believe it happens, but obviously I'm wrong. 😩

Oh I’m incredibly strident and have no fear of confrontation. But I don’t fuck about when it comes to my child’s safety so if I’m in a situation where an intimidating man (or in this case two of them) could turn on me I don’t risk it. I haven’t since I became a mum. It’s not about just me any more.

I think kissing on the mouth as a little one is fine and bathing with your dad as a toddler is also fine, just for the record.

My husband always bathed with our toddlers and so did I,and no we didn’t wear swimming trunks.You are being ridiculous of course you got flamed.

And just for the record, people are rank.

Yeah absolutely. Nothing sexual about kissing your kids on the lips or bathing with them

if that’s your (not yours..) thoughts you have an issue

I was only kidding about the fake German accent! I think you’re very wise to just ignore… .

Thankfully, I’ve never in my entire life witnessed anyone calling babies sexy , nor people calling their teen/adult children sexy , it’s so fucking weird !!!!!!

None of these are like calling a baby sexy.

In fact, as you discovered at the school dates, your weirdness is just another cheek of the same creepy arse - you are both projecting a layer of adult sexuality onto a normal adult-child scenario.

Not that I know anything about this but I wonder if "sexy" is one of those words that has become ubiquitous on TikTok / YouTube etc. to the point where (some) people use it in a "normalised" way. Not that that excuses how disgustingly inappropriate and awful it is to use in relation to babies / children - especially in this day and age where safeguarding is a number 1 priority.

And some people, like you, are prudes.

Nothing to do with what the OP has posted at all. I kiss DS on the lips at the school gate, and my husband has baths with both him and DD. All perfectly normal.

I would rather do that, project a layer of adult sexuality onto a normal adult-child scenario, than allow my dh, dick hanging, to bathe in the same bath as my toddlers. I am forever grateful that neither he nor I are from the 'naked' families.

@PowderMonkeys that's so true

It is admittedly weird but I've heard loads of people do this. But then I don't think the word "sexy" is always used in reference to sex. People refer to good food as "sexy". I once heard my aunt refer to her new fridge as "sexy".

This isn't really a good comment to put. They shouldn't report it because it doesn't meet the threshold, but if there was actual abuse witnessed people absolutely should report it regardless of details they have. Most places have a lot of cctv and there's a good chance the police would be able to trace the person by recognition, their car licence plate if parked nearby on camera or a debit or credit card used on camera nearby. If there's an actual crime it can absolutely be reported and often traced.

It's fine not to want to do it yourself.

What's deeply weird is to assume that those who do are likely paedophiles.

I never said they were paedos - I implied they were vulgar abnormal savages without an ounce of decency, deeply abnormal, but not paedophiles!

Yes, the "I could eat you up" line is common in many cultures, with pretend nibbles and part of play with babies. I have never seen it as a negative. I have never seen anyone describe a baby as sexy and that is genuinely icky.

Now you’re being pathetic and ridiculous.