Neighbour knocking door at all hours asking for help

[daisyrabir]

There is a family that have recently moved in a few doors down.
English is not the native language and the family do not speak English very well.

A few times now the older lady has knocked on my door at around 10:30pm at night asking for help.
I did open the door and helped her with her phone issue.

Its like now it’s all the time, she will just come round in the day and night asking for help.

I have young children one of whom is a newborn and don’t want her to keep knocking on my door, especially at night.

She does this to the other neighbours as well.

DP has told me to just ignore the door now.
AIBU?

I never answer the door those hours. 10 pm I go to bed anyway.

Gosh there's a lot of mean people on this thread.

OP, just tell her you are starting so wind down/ rest from (insert time), and to not knock then.

You could login it on line with 101 as a concern, and encourage the neighbour to do so too.

the lady is knocking on her door between the hours of 5am - 11pm at night on a daily basis.

If she hasn't got dementia, it sounds like she's bored or lonely. I'd suggest she gets a job!

It's not mean to not want to be unpaid social support to a complete stranger! It'd actually be meaner to start doing it then stop.

Quite possibly. I’m 60, fit and well but I worry for my disabled husband, who is 65 and pretty frail.

No offence taken.

Have you actually asked her to come back at a more suitable time? Perhaps she doesn’t know it isn’t the done thing? Just explain it to her, or ask her child to. No need to me horrible and ignore unless she continues after this.

Why can’t the op open her own door? Weird question

Op I think you’ve been too polite and now your neighbour is taking advantage because you’ve helped once or twice now. Maybe other neighbours don’t help her and she knows you will so she’s going to keep bothering you. Be firm and tell her she needs to stop coming over as you are busy and have a young baby.

Jesus’

We have ordered a Ringdoor bell, she was knocking on my door today at 7am and hovering around the other neighbours doors, it looked like she was filming on her phone?

Her son was at home as DP saw him smoking outside their front door.

Your partner could have a word with the lady's son.

You need to tell her to stop. Some straight talking required.

Try using google translate to speak with the family. Its possible this lady has issues & is using the phone as a reason to knock. We discovered that my nan had been knocking at her neighbours door for all sorts of reasons for a while but they didn’t tell us until she knocked quite distressed looking for my grandad who had been dead for 11 years. She was diagnosed then with dementia. The family may not realise she is knocking at your doors.

You need to speak to the extended family that lives with her and tell them she is becoming a nuisance with the neighbours, I think she must be ga ga or similar as can't her family that lives in the house help her with phone/appliances etc ?

The family may not realise she is knocking at your doors.

@BaileyBooMum I think (as OP has said so) that the family do indeed know.

I think the family must be aware as we have just noticed that they have a Ringdoor bell?

On one occasional the lady has gone to my neighbours and one of the relatives have gone to fetch her.

DP will try and talk to the sons when he see’s him next.

Good luck. You shouldn’t have to put up with being constantly disturbed, whatever this lady’s culture is, however kind and willing to help you are
i I think it’s odd that her sons haven’t told her not to do it.
I guess if you didn’t answer, she would keep knocking which is worse.

Have you tried speaking to other members of the family? Perhaps try asking one of those to have a word with her about bothering the neighbours or post a simple note through their door/send it via the post if you don’t want to do it face to face

Id vote dementia too based on my own experience with a neighbour. Such a shame and very stressful for the family but it will help the family if they can get supporting information to relay to the appropriate channels to make her safe. Far too often do you hear of eldery vulnerable people wandering in next to nothing at all hours barefoot etc.
Id suggest exchanging your number or email and putting each incident in short and factual messages because aside frok holding her hostage they cant do much to prevent her dementia presenting in a way which is a nuisance. I reckon it would expedite help and you will benefit.

😂😂😂

There is no way someone that young with family nearby should be bothering you the way she is. I would absolutely ignore.

This could end in one of those "boy who cries wolf" situations. She's bothering neighbours late at night over something trivial, and then the help won't be there in an emergency or when she really needs it.

I would perhaps explain the situation to her next time that you can't be disturbed after x time because your children are sleeping and saying you will only be available to help in an absolute emergency. But being really honest, I just stopped answering the door to my nuisance neighbour - he soon got the hint. I did feel a bit rude, but I had to protect my peace. So do what you need to do.

This! I work in adult social services, I'm not sure what help we'd be expected to provide in this instance or indeed even have the resources or money to be wasting time on a scenario like this!

I'm guessing she is expecting t'foreman who is calling to say "t'trouble at mill".

No wonder our taxes are so high and that Adults Social Servicesare snowed under.

It's lovely to help a neighbour, perhaps suggest they knock during the day.