Omg my neighbour has really upset me is this ok?

[Horseytwinkletoes2]

Hi!
Ok so I moved into a house 3 months ago not ventured outside to play and our new garden is being done next week as its not fir to use. Today 2nd day of easter holidays I took my 3 year old and 8 year old round the block on their scooters. I was round the back of one of the neighbours houses she lives 3 doors away and which backs onto a public cul de sac type street. I was out with them for 5 mins when the woman comes from her house and shouts that she needs my children to stop and they're trying to eat their dinner (it was 2.50pm) and all they can here is THAT (pointed to my children) and tbey need to stop and move away. She was sat in her conservatory with the doors open ypu can just make put from over the fence.
At that point my 3 year old scooted off near the road so I ran after her but didn't really know what to say.
I started taking a video of them playing and have them playing on video for 4 mins before she came out. They were literally just talking and saying how bumpy the pavement was etc and laughing as they went over drain bumps. They weren't shouting or anything and i was next to them the whole time.
It reeeeeally upset me as someone who tried to do good by people. But now I'm just filled with anger towards her and wish I'd have bit back.
Orrrrrrr shluld I have just said sorry it was my bad doing?

@ReadingSoManyThreads You know you sound ridiculous ? Outside your house for 5 minutes would disturb you? So you think people should be silent when OUTSIDE your house . And intrigued to know what kind of scooters make such abominable noise . You are exactly the kind of narky neighbour that makes me laugh . Maybe you should move onto a vast estate - oh wait you can't afford it , so bought in an area where other people are entitled to live . Shudder away ..

If I was you this would be my queue to take them out and do even more playing! Maybe tell them they can be as noisy as they like.

If the neighbour says anything more, perhaps give them a lovely kind update that she shouldn't worry because you'll be having your garden done shortly, so that the kids can play as loudly as they want in their new garden... 3 doors away :-D . Oh and then maybe buy them a nice new set of musical instruments :-D

Oh 100%!

It's the Easter holidays. She must be having fun times!

This : you can give her a proper Paddington Bear Hard Stare then just turn on your heel and walk off .

or tell her that the sounds of her cutlery scraping on her plates sets your teeth on edge "I find it's far worse with cheap plates" head tilt

Or: my neighbours across the street have the a dog barking every time the same night ( after 10pm) I eventually realised its a recording ... DH and I call it Synthetic Dog 😄
So get a really annoying loud dog bark recording ( I think they're a security alarm) and when she complains look baffled and say "I haven't even GOT a dog"!

Go back tomorrow at 1pm, if she pops out, say to her "don't worry we'll be finished playing by dinner time".
Ignore her.
Children playing is normal noise.

Tell her to mind her own business and smile!

I get that you feel like you should have stood up for yourself but I think it could have gone far worse if you had done so, without first taking time to think it over, as you are actually doing.

My first thought was that you are dealing with someone who is mentally ill or suffering from an early stage of dementia. Of course I don't know that for sure but I think it's highly likely. So it never hurts to step back, and when you do react, try to do so calmly and kindly. You never know what's going on in her mind, for her to have such a strong, OTT reaction. Perhaps she is even frightened. Who knows, right?

How about something like this: "Oh, I'm sorry you don't like the noise. But you know, as far as I know, children are allowed to play outdoors in the afternoon, on public property. I'll definitely try to keep their noise to a minimum, though. Have a nice day, ma'am." If she keeps being unreasonable, just go on your way and try to avoid being near her home, as much as possible.

Also, some old bat flying out of her house all crazy, shrieking at little kids playing is a bit hysterical. Just another perspective. Good luck with it!

We've recently moved due to neighbours like this so you have my sympathy- we don't have children at home but I saw her tear into parents on many occasions and her husband caught me unawares with unreasonable complaints. She's let you know who she is so be ready to put her into her place. My ex neighbours had form and even their own adult daughter had cut ties. They are unhappy people. So glad we escaped!

Who takes their kids to play outside someone else’s house - if you’re scooting about on your way to somewhere totally not a problem but if you’ve gone out of your way take the kids to play there and don’t live there why would you think that’s ok

I would have such fun with this. Take recorders next time and teach them to play "London's Burning". Then kazoos with any song you fancy eg "Baby Shark". Maybe your DC fancy learning a trumpet or the bagpipes. I'd take them to practice outside her house.

You’ve never lived on an estate or terraced street then.

2.50pm tomorrow sounds great for a play date, invite some pals

She’s absolutely ridiculous. I get why you didn’t say anything sometimes peoples twatish behaviour leaves you speechless. If she says anything to you again try to stand up to her.

Course I have but we weren’t allowed to play outside other peoples houses -I live in an estate now and the kids don’t just play in the street randomly they play in their gardens or go to the park.

When we lived in a terrace the kids would scoot up and down but the length of the street not just outside one house

Who shouts at primary-aged children you don't know playing loudly when you could just close your windows?

I grew up on an estate. We all played out everywhere aside from near the miserable scary old peoples houses who’d shout at us.

This is the view I take: playing in the garden, or on the street is what I see as their 'reasonable enjoyment' (unless they're taking the p & stopping me from sleeping at night).

Unfortunately the sound causes my kids (and sometimes me) to self-harm, so I do all I can to mitigate it indoors, or leave if we have to. Thankfully the city where we live has lots of parks.

Omg children are people too!! They are allowed to exist and take up space in public!

keep living your life but be prepared you all have to tackle this at some point I would expect. I think she’ll do it again .

My isual reaction is to smile, wave and say cheerily “hi there! “ and if she persists: “sorry, I’m hearing impaired” with nice smile and then just carry on, cheerfully. She won’t be able to get past that. If you get cross, she’s won. Enjoy your new home!

I looove old hags like this. I would’ve said:
”Excuse me? Would you repeat that? I couldn’t hear you over my children having fun.”

I'd much rather your kids playing than my neighbour's kid and his fucking basketball thudding away all afternoon! If it's like last year it'll be constant all summer and I'm sure could be used as a form of torture.

Try to keep yourself and the children away from her for the time being. Sadly these days there's so many folk who are less tolerant ,once you've got your garden done things will improve,and they and you will enjoy your own space,however you have every right to take your children for a walk, play in the park if there is one.if it's a small community ,chances are you may come across her, but if you feel you need to speak to her,do it on a one to one without your children present.good luck.

You sound nice.