To find this bizarre? Friend and soap

[SplodgePocket]

A friend came around earlier as I had a half day. Before she left, she said she was just popping to the loo. I then heard her call a minute later, “Splodge? There’s no soap”.

I have a dispenser, so I assumed it had run out and called back that there was some on the side of the bath. There was a pause and she called back, “No, not here”. I knew it was there so replied, “Just against the wall, behind the shower screen”. Again, a pause before a bewildered “No…”

I was completely confused now, as I knew very well it was there. I went through to the hall and she was standing in the doorway looking baffled. I went in, looked behind the screen and sure enough, there it was. I handed it to her and said, “Here, see?”

She burst out laughing and said, “Ohhhhh!! It’s shower gel!!” I was a bit confused and replied, “Well yes; soap, shower gel… whatever”. She was smiling at me a bit like I was a child who’d made a comical mistake. She said, “You said soap. This is shower gel. Show-er gel.” With the last bit really slowly, like she wasn’t sure English was my first language.

I was really taken aback. Who is this bizarrely literal? Surely it’s all pretty much the same thing? I thought maybe she was looking for a bar of soap and this was what had confused her somehow, but surely when you couldn’t see it you’d think “it must be the stuff in the bottle”? And even if you didn’t, wouldn’t you just have used the shower gel anyway?

I’ve never noticed her take things so literally before. Is it me or is this just really odd?!

Okay I admit I didn’t read all OPs posts before posting but now I have ,,,,

so in that case the correct response would have been “oh sorry, is the dispenser empty? Just grab the shower gel fir now and I’ll refill the hand wash later.”

Your first post definitely implied that you don’t keep handwashing by the sink.

Your first post definitely implied that you don’t keep handwashing by the sink.
It really didn't. It clearly implied the dispenser of soap by the sink was unexpectedly empty.

She did look in the exact place she'd been told to look, but the item she was looking for wasn't there. Isn't that obvious? She was looking for soap not shower gel. If you asked me where the shampoo was, and I said it's on the shelf, but the only thing on the shelf was conditioner, you wouldn't think 'oh yes this is what I was looking for'.

But conditioner can’t be used instead of shampoo!

You can, it’s called cowashing.

Anyway, it’s not about whether you can wash your hands with shower gel: it’s about whether shower gel is called soap. Which it isn’t, as evidenced by the label on the bottle.

You're right.

I think the bottom line, OP, is that for you it seems perfectlly normal to use shower gel when the soap has run out. It wouldn't be for someone else.

It's just different upbringing, different expectations and different experiences.

All it needed for you to clarify that you meant just use the shower gel and the whole thing would have even avoided.

And thats what i think most people would actually have done.

"Oh there's no soap? Just use the shower gel instead!" Rather than insisting there was soap when there wasn't.

It's really not a big deal.
.

Or soap on a bloody rope

Obviously, people have different priorities, but I think it largely depends on what that 'something' is.

If you accidentally run out of cornflakes, but you have weetabix or rice crispies in, it's no biggie. If you run out of something that you need/want for your evening meal, but you'll be going past a shop in good time, also no problem.

But if it's a product that most people consider essential for cleanliness - such as soap/handwash or bog roll - and it isn't something you can generally hang on without using indefinitely, I'm amazed that people wouldn't be keen to ensure that they always have a spare for when it's needed.

I accept that, to OP, handwash/soap and shower gel are interchangeable - and that this is largely a weirdness in communication rather than the availability of a suitable product; but the fact that she already has a soap dispenser next to the sink AND shower gel next to the bath does suggest that she sees the convenience in having both.

Also, shower gel bottles are designed to be handled and opened by hands that probably need a clean and freshen up, but not for hands that may well (to be blunt) have traces of wee and/or poo on them. It's easy to press the pump of a handwash bottle with your 'non-wiping' hand, or even with your wrist; but picking up, opening, positioning and squeezing a shower gel bottle with only one hand is very difficult.

What a peculiar response. How could you possibly misinterpret 'something that they have to handle to wash their fanny' - with 'handle' commonly being understood to mean to use/control with your hands (the clue is in the first four letters) - as a suggestion that you would actually shove the whole bottle up there?!

Whatever private activities somebody may choose to do whilst having a shower is entirely up to them; but that would hardly be an effective way of even cleaning it, would it?!

But if it's a product that most people consider essential for cleanliness - such as soap/handwash or bog roll - and it isn't something you can generally hang on without using indefinitely, I'm amazed that people wouldn't be keen to ensure that they always have a spare for when it's needed.

If only I’d had a very similar substitute to hand… 🤔

OP, I think you're coming across quite funny TBF. The lack of understanding on this thread is also funny...and worrying.
I still stand by my earlier post, if someone told me that the soap was somewhere, id be looking for soap. Since the only bottle they could see was shower gel, I'd probably have asked if that was what you meant (because people can be right funny buggers if you use the wrong product). It's just problem solving. No need for her the wring her hands in panick and having to call you in to help her.

If you read the rest of my post that you partially quoted and responded to, you would have understood the full context of my point!

Yeah, I'd have said it too.

But, as the guest, I'd have asked "Is it okay to use the shower gel?" because I'm not a snidey prat like your friend, OP.

I'm not saying you're incorrect and I do see what you're saying but there's 0 chance it would occur to me to use shower gel when looking for soap. It just isn't in the same place in my brain. I'd just stand there being confused as well.

Your friend goes to pour herself a glass of wine but calls out she can’t see any wine glasses (you’ve unexpectedly run out, all in the dishwasher)

You call back there should be one in the top left cupboard. She can’t see it. You eventually go in and exasperated hand her a mug from the exact cupboard you told her to look in!

Is the issue that she doesn’t realise, believe or accept it’s possible to drink wine out of a mug? Or is it that she didn’t realise you were suggesting she does use a mug, because she’s looking for a wine glass.

They serve an identical function. They can be used interchangeably, but they have different names that refer to different things. I can’t believe that hasn’t clicked for you yet OP.

You're telling me there's people out there washing their hands with shower gel...?

Agree, what’s the point in even writing the post and asking for an opinion when you are convinced you were right…..the OP was convinced she was right and was only looking for validation which she / he didn’t get

What? I don't know why you find that so bizarre and amusing. It's not normal to go to someone else's house and use shower gel after you've gone for a wee, unless it was next to the basin?

OP does use hand soap and usually has it in the dispenser on the sink. She unexpectedly ran out. In that situation, OP uses shower gel or similar. She has said this over and over again on the thread.

Because your post assumes she doesn't normally have soap and that shower gel is her default. A bizarre error loads of posters have made. And has caused understandable frustration. Hence OP's response to you.

She maybe assumed you got it wrong and there wasn’t any handwash there! Honestly I can’t see how you don’t see why you’re the odd one!

At last you acknowledge it’s a substitute! If only you had been willing to tell your friend to use the shower gel!

Off topic but where do you keep your shampoo, conditioner, face wash, etc?

But if it's a product that most people consider essential for cleanliness - such as soap/handwash or bog roll - and it isn't something you can generally hang on without using indefinitely, I'm amazed that people wouldn't be keen to ensure that they always have a spare for when it's needed.
Being keen to always have something in doesnt mean you don't also sometimes run out of it. It's not a moral failing

Ok. But even if there was an empty soap thing, I'd expect the host to say 'oh if it's empty just use the shower gel by the bath'.
Then maybe the confusion wouldn't have occurred? It's all light-hearted anyway so sorry if I lost the thread a bit! 🤣