Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To find this bizarre? Friend and soap

593 replies

SplodgePocket · 15/04/2025 18:56

A friend came around earlier as I had a half day. Before she left, she said she was just popping to the loo. I then heard her call a minute later, “Splodge? There’s no soap”.

I have a dispenser, so I assumed it had run out and called back that there was some on the side of the bath. There was a pause and she called back, “No, not here”. I knew it was there so replied, “Just against the wall, behind the shower screen”. Again, a pause before a bewildered “No…”

I was completely confused now, as I knew very well it was there. I went through to the hall and she was standing in the doorway looking baffled. I went in, looked behind the screen and sure enough, there it was. I handed it to her and said, “Here, see?”

She burst out laughing and said, “Ohhhhh!! It’s shower gel!!” I was a bit confused and replied, “Well yes; soap, shower gel… whatever”. She was smiling at me a bit like I was a child who’d made a comical mistake. She said, “You said soap. This is shower gel. Show-er gel.” With the last bit really slowly, like she wasn’t sure English was my first language.

I was really taken aback. Who is this bizarrely literal? Surely it’s all pretty much the same thing? I thought maybe she was looking for a bar of soap and this was what had confused her somehow, but surely when you couldn’t see it you’d think “it must be the stuff in the bottle”? And even if you didn’t, wouldn’t you just have used the shower gel anyway?

I’ve never noticed her take things so literally before. Is it me or is this just really odd?!

OP posts:
SplodgePocket · 16/04/2025 00:57

Hastentoadd · 16/04/2025 00:52

But you specifically told her there was soap😂😂
Why didn’t you say reach into the shower and grab the shower gel🤷‍♂️

Because I thought she had more common sense.

OP posts:
Negroany · 16/04/2025 01:03

SplodgePocket · 16/04/2025 00:57

Because I thought she had more common sense.

But you're the one without common sense. It's common sense to tell someone what it is you are telling them to look for. Which was Radox shower gel. Green/blue squirty bottle (etc). Not "soap". I know it is a type of soap, of course, in that both are detergent, but it's not what we think of as soap colloquially.

getahhtmapub · 16/04/2025 01:04

Soap, shower gel, shampoo. Meh whatever they are all the same probably but it’s a bit bloody weird to be assuming that someone will poke around in your shower area looking for a generic cleaning substance.
It would never occur to me to think ‘oh yeah I’ll use Belinda’s shower gel’ and skiffle around behind flannels and bum/foot scrubbers to find it.

Hastentoadd · 16/04/2025 01:04

SplodgePocket · 16/04/2025 00:57

Because I thought she had more common sense.

She was looking for soap because you said it was there, common sense doesn’t come into it🤷

SplodgePocket · 16/04/2025 01:05

Iwannakeepondancing · 15/04/2025 20:30

Ok you’re the odd one here!
Yes it’s all the same probably and no I wouldn’t care about washing my hands with shower gel BUT why would she think to look for shower gel? She was looking for hand wash and couldn’t find it! It’s odd you’d think she would know to grab the SHOWER GEL to wash her hands! If it was in an unlabelled bottle behind the shower screen then yes maybe!

As I have said time and again, there was nothing else there! What did she think I meant?

OP posts:
SplodgePocket · 16/04/2025 01:05

Hastentoadd · 16/04/2025 01:04

She was looking for soap because you said it was there, common sense doesn’t come into it🤷

Clearly not for you.

OP posts:
Hastentoadd · 16/04/2025 01:06

SplodgePocket · 16/04/2025 01:05

As I have said time and again, there was nothing else there! What did she think I meant?

Soap!!😂😂😂 because that’s what you said🤷

SplodgePocket · 16/04/2025 01:07

getahhtmapub · 16/04/2025 01:04

Soap, shower gel, shampoo. Meh whatever they are all the same probably but it’s a bit bloody weird to be assuming that someone will poke around in your shower area looking for a generic cleaning substance.
It would never occur to me to think ‘oh yeah I’ll use Belinda’s shower gel’ and skiffle around behind flannels and bum/foot scrubbers to find it.

But I didn’t assume she’d do this. I specifically said “It’s on the side of the bath behind the shower screen”.

If she’d gone through my knicker drawer just in case, then yes, that would be weird. But if you tell someone something is behind the shower screen, surely they’re not smashing through boundaries to, you know, look behind the shower screen?

OP posts:
Hastentoadd · 16/04/2025 01:08

SplodgePocket · 16/04/2025 01:05

Clearly not for you.

Let’s face it you were in the wrong and you know it😂😂😂

SplodgePocket · 16/04/2025 01:08

Hastentoadd · 16/04/2025 01:06

Soap!!😂😂😂 because that’s what you said🤷

But there was only one bottle there!! Join the fucking dots!!!

OP posts:
SplodgePocket · 16/04/2025 01:09

Hastentoadd · 16/04/2025 01:08

Let’s face it you were in the wrong and you know it😂😂😂

Nah.

OP posts:
Hastentoadd · 16/04/2025 01:09

SplodgePocket · 16/04/2025 01:09

Nah.

Yip😂

Sleepington · 16/04/2025 01:17

It wouldn't have occurred to me to use your shower gel or that you wanted her to use your shower gel to wash her hands.

You're the odd one here OP.

SplodgePocket · 16/04/2025 01:18

Gwenhwyfar · 15/04/2025 20:54

This.
As opposed to other people on this thread, I HAVE used shower gel to wash my hands when I've run out of hand wash, but then I'd put the bottle by the sink so it's obvious and I would have explained that to a confused visitor.

Do I have to write a haiku or a sonnet to explain this again? Or express it through interpretative dance?

I did not know the soap dispenser was empty. I don’t know how many ways there are to say that. If I had known that, I would have filled it. I wouldn't have moved the shower gel because there wouldn’t have been any need.

OP posts:
SplodgePocket · 16/04/2025 01:19

lovemycbf · 15/04/2025 21:01

Just buy some liquid hand soap for the bathroom sink
it’s odd not having any and I wouldn’t think you meant shower gel either

Jesus!!!!!!

OP posts:
PeteReturns · 16/04/2025 01:21

I wouldn’t have even asked you, I would have just used the closest soapy thing and mentioned you had run out of hand soap on my way out.

No big deal, but I’m probably weird in that I only really ever go to the homes of people who are good friends/family, and I used to be so poor the only soap, for everything including hair was dish soap.

Sleepington · 16/04/2025 01:24

SplodgePocket · 16/04/2025 01:05

As I have said time and again, there was nothing else there! What did she think I meant?

She obviously thought as most people would think, that you thought there was a bottle/bar of hand soap on the side of the bath because she asked for soap and you replied that was where it was.

If you had shouted up the stairs that you were out of soap but she could use the shower gel on the side of the bath, then she'd have located it and used it.

Your error was assuming that other people use shower gel and hand soap interchangeably when most of us don't.

You asked for the difference and many people use liquid soap with a sanitiser esp after using the toilet. It has never occurred to me to substitute shower gel instead.

SallyDraperGetInHere · 16/04/2025 01:26

I exist in the same parallel universe as @SplodgePocket. Her guest was being obtuse. If she couldn’t figure out that the liquid soap dispenser dispenses soap in liquid form, and that an alternative liquid soap in plain sight was being suggested, she’s the weirdo. It’s not hard.

SplodgePocket · 16/04/2025 01:28

Waterbaby41 · 15/04/2025 22:26

She hadn't run out of soap though.

What?!? 😆😆

OP posts:
SplodgePocket · 16/04/2025 01:30

Poppinjay · 15/04/2025 22:37

You'd be looking for handsoap behind the shower screen after you had discovered that the handsoap dispenser on the sink was empty?

Do people usually keep handsoap on the bath?

But I specifically said “It’s behind the shower screen on the side of the bath”!

If you can’t work out to look in the exact place you’ve been told to look, there’s no bloody hope.

OP posts:
MsAmerica · 16/04/2025 01:33

Meh. I might do the same, since I've never encountered shower gel.
What's bizarre to me is that you considered this meaningful enough to quiz the forum about it.

PeteReturns · 16/04/2025 01:34

Soap with a a sanitiser?
Soap used properly with hot water literally is a sanitiser, that’s the whole point of it?
Shower gel is soap, she didn’t need to make a big deal of it.

SoInLuv · 16/04/2025 01:39

Pushmepullyou · 15/04/2025 18:59

I would wash my hands with shower gel if there was no soap. But it’s not soap

Same and I've done it! No big deal.

rainbowsparkle28 · 16/04/2025 01:47

Whilst yes on the occasion in a pinch yes you could use shower gel and I have, I wouldn’t naturally take it to be a hand wash so can see why when clearly she was wanting whatever it would be to wash your hands after going to the loo she wasn’t thinking of shower gel. I think the main thing here is if someone said soap I would think of a bar of soap, not a bottle of shower gel! 🧼

lunaemma · 16/04/2025 01:48

I wouldn’t have asked TBH if I was at a friends house, would have just had a glance around and used a bit of whatever soap type thing that foamed up was available, probably avoiding the ££££ face cleanser
Shampoo, soap, shower gel, whatever is available

I wash my hands before skincare with a gel cleanser at the minute because I don’t like it and want to use it up
Did have to move my Aesop hand wash after finding my dad washing his face with it Blush