MIL buying baby cringey clothing

[Copenhagener]

A very short AIBU.

I had my first baby last year. My MIL wants to buy baby clothing - I’m fine with that.

Instead of buying baby items we’ve said we like or need, she keeps buying baby clothing with pointed and cringey ‘grandma knows best’ slogans that I find so embarrassing to dress her in - so I don’t.

See picture below for an example: ‘Grandma: a mother without rules!’

There has also been: ‘grandma’s best friend’ ‘pass me to grandma’ ‘’if mommy says no, ask grandma!’ ‘call grandma: she always knows what to do!’ Etc. I have no idea where she finds this nonsense. She’s deliberately going out of her way to buy them. A lot are clearly low-quality rubbish from the internet.

She keeps asking why baby isn’t wearing said clothing and going on and on about how funny these outfits are when I see her.

AIBU to not dress baby in these outfits / ask her to cut it out?

It’s not her first grandchild and up until now, I thought we had a good relationship, but now I feel a bit irritated with her.

Ah, just smile and take the clothes saying thank you.

Take a photo of baby in them l, send her it and take it off immediately afterwards if it bothers you.

They are tacky, but in absence of any other behavious she just sounds excited.

Just put them on for an hour or two when you know MIL will be seeing the baby?
Take a picture of the baby wearing it and send to MIL and donate?

Idk if you can address the slogans without ruffling feathers but I would not be putting my baby in any of that! It would definitely annoy me, it's like it's trying to wind you up. Plus the fact the clothes are low quality, you could always say you're only choosing organic cotton or something.

I guess you could say you don't like slogans on baby clothes and you don't want her to waste money going forward. It is fun choosing clothes for a baby but not ones seeming like they're trying to send a message, and also they're not dolls

If you don’t like the slogans, fair enough, but to say “low quality rubbish” sounds snobby, you need to get over that.

I think you need to be more humble and grateful for a mil who is involved and interested. You don’t have to like the clothes she buys, but in the grand scheme, it would do you no harm to put them on for an hour or so when she is about.

Don’t make things awkward over a few baby grows. It’s a bit mean spirited.

My mil has terrible taste. When my boys were younger they were pageboys for my brother in laws wedding.
She wanted to buy their outfits and when I bought them a shirt, wastecoat and tie she had a right shitty on. I think her mother of the groom outfit cost £3 from primark and she proudly told everyone
If you don't want to dress your baby in those then don't. I wouldn't either. My youngest son was given a girls top with a heart on it from my mil mum for his 1st birthday. It went in the charity collection bag. She thought it was fine but my son had plenty of other clothes and didn't need to wear a top clearly for a girl.

I think they only make these clothes in small baby sizes so try to think of it as a temporary problem.

i would make a comment or two about how many baby clothes she has, as so many family and friends have gifted clothes plus you like to shop for her and it’s starting to get out of hand. You are trying to buy less and also buy more toys as she grows so perhaps grandma would like to do the same?

O gawd i hate those ones too!!
There was one like ' dont mess with me my mum is crazy and so is my aunt and i am not afraid to use them'

I dont get the trend to put really long sentences on t shirts.

I got a cushion cover as a gift that said somethibg like ' this is sunni's house. Something about home or whatever then. Where she is spoilt'
Just do the photo thing

Just pick a few of the least worst ones, take a picture and never put baby in them again.

Did she do this when her other grandkids were babies? Perhaps it’s her way of showing her relationship to the baby. If you and your DH made a fuss of your daughter ‘getting a cuddle from grandma’ when you pass your daughter to her and then ‘thank you grandma for coming to visit’ when she’s leaving she might not feel the need to buy grandma slogan clothes.

I don’t like anything with slogans, logos, or labels and would dislike anything with a Ralph Lauren logo just as much as a top with a Primark logo. But if my mother in law had been kind enough to take the time to buy a present for my baby, then I think it would be insulting if the baby didn’t wear it when the mother in law saw her. Sometimes you have to grit your teeth and make an effort to avoid offending a close relative, and I think this is one of those occasions.

In the end that's a vest so easy to put under clothes. Can't you pop baby in it, take a picture and shove sleepsuit or outfit over it?

Put the kid in it, take a photo then charity shop it. Don’t sweat the small stuff. You’ve got an involved grandma which is a bonus.

It's all very attention seeking on your MIL's part. It's also really tacky. I wouldn't use them unless everything else was in the wash.

Quick clarification on quality: a lot of it is from the website TEMU, which I’m not comfortable with my baby wearing because of concerns about how the clothing is manufactured / lack of regulations. I tried washing one set before use (was going to use them as sleepwear) and they literally disintegrated in the washing machine. It’s not about labels (I don’t buy anything designer, though I prefer organic cotton/wool) but about genuinely low-quality items.

I have put baby in said clothing a couple of times when I know I would see MIL, but it’s more that every time I send a photo, she asks why baby isn’t wearing these exact clothes. Once, she even changed baby into them when I was in another room. We had a meal with her recently and she kept talking about it to the people at the table and pointing out the slogan - and saying how it’s so true. My baby is 4 months old, so I just find it utterly odd and felt a bit attacked. I’m not some strict disciplinarian with my baby, so I didn’t like that she kept pointing out she is ‘fun’ and mums aren’t…

I honestly wouldn't care and they would put it on them.

Absolutely no one cares what clothes a baby or child is wearing (as long as they are appropriate for the weather.)

Children's clothes are there to keep them warm/cool and comfortable. They are not fashionable little dolls, there to be dressed up for others' compliments.

I'm always baffled by people's views on children's 'fashion'

Weird behaviour! That vest is quite nice though apart from the slogan (which is quite hard to read in that script anyway!). I'd stick it under some dungarees or something. I agree with the PP who suggested taking a photo of baby in the offending clothes and then forget about it or use as PJs/under other clothes etc if suitable.

she sounds controlling and as if she is trying to undermine you and your relationship.with your baby. I would be stamping on that from the start .

My MIL bought vests from a Tenerife tourist shop, the most hideous yellow and plastic printed animals with grandma got me this from Tenerife! But… I think it’s nice she was thinking of him when she bought them…They go in my son’s nursery bag as spares!

You are far too tolerant!! I get on great with my children and their OHs, but I would be told in no uncertain terms that it was rubbish and my grandchild would not be wearing them. My children tend to speak their minds.
The clothes are really really tacky.

I also find these sorts of things cringey but equally, I probably wouldn't get that annoyed because it's definitely her way of trying to show how excited she is to be a grandma again. Ultimately, baby clothes don't fit a baby for very long anyway and most babies throw up or poo on their clothes fairly frequently so even if you just occasionally put your baby in one of the naff babygros just to take a photo for your MIL, they're probably only going to be wearing it for a couple of hours or something.

If she's on Facebook or Instagram, she will be buying these because she'll be seeing constant adverts for them. The algorithms will know she's a grandmother and will be targeting her with adverts for things like this and she can't resist clicking. I suspect my mum would be like this if she had baby grandkids too. I'm a very keen reader and I get tons of adverts for cheap dropship t-shirts with smug slogans about reading on them.

I do see why it irritates you, and I would also be irked by it, but I think choose your battles. There are way way worse things she could be doing and this is pretty harmless really.

Someone would have to be really close to your baby to even read that slogan so I wouldn't worry about it. If she says things about the slogans in front of other people just let her carry on. They might be cringing themselves.

So annoying OP! One or two things wouldn’t bother me but it seems at bit OTT. I’d tell her no slogans please and absolutely no TEMU!!! These are not unreasonable requests.

I am shocked how many people I see dressing their babies in TEMU and Shein and decorating their rooms with rubbish from there. its all over instagram - some of these people have a lot of money and I thought, some intelligence! It’s all so dangerous! I can imagine poppers falling off and baby putting them in their mouth etc. And highly unethical and ruining the planet.

Could you tell her your baby got a rash from the glue/print/materialnl from the temu clothes and you prefer clothes tester for safety in the UK?

I know lying isn't dealing with the problem but if it's just a difference in taste I don't think you want to offend her for being involved.

Unless you think she is seriously undermining you and it's part of a wider problem, in which case get your DH to talk to her.

Put the vests on under other clothing and when it comes to T shirts etc just make out baby was sick if she comes around the same day you sent a quick pic