To refuse to take responsibility for DP's dog walk before work

[italianprincess]

DP has just got a new job which has fixed hours. She has to be at work for 9am Monday - Friday. It is a 20-25 minute drive to her new job. In her previous job she had a lot more flexibility, worked from home and could pretty much choose the hours she worked.
I have always had a job where I have to be in the office by 10am at the latest but I prefer getting in for 9am so that I can finish at 5pm rather than 6pm. Most people in my office arrive between 8 and 8.30am but I'm rarely there that early. It takes me an hour to get to work (40 minute drive and then 20 minute walk from the car park).
Until now DP and I have had an agreement where she walks the dog first thing in the morning Monday-Thursday and I do Friday-Sunday. The Friday has worked for me because I often work from home on a Friday and then I'm off work on Sat and Sunday.
DP has now said that she will be unable to walk the dog in the mornings due to starting her new job. She doesn't start her job officially for a couple of weeks but she is going into work tomorrow for a training course which starts at 9.15am. She has asked me if I can walk the dog in the morning, but I've said no. I don't want to set a precedent where she expects me to walk the dog every morning of the week just because she now has to work from 9am, which I've had to do the whole time. Her response to my refusal was 'well I don't know how he's going to get walked then because I have to be at work for 9.15am'. She has 40 minutes less of a commute than I do and people all over the world manage to walk their dog before starting work in the morning.
AIBU?

I dint want to make it a precedent

Who do you think you are? her mother/father??

This dog is both yours right? You both need to find something that works for both of you. And doesn’t put all the effort onto one person.
The fact you dint want to change anything because it might inconvenience you, Regardiess of the impact on your partner says a lot.

So yes you are massively unreasonable

If she only works PT if it’s PT hours each day then surely she can walk the dog when she gets home?

If she doesn’t have to leave home until 8:30am, what is stopping her walking the dog before work?

I genuinely can’t see what the problem is?

Is she going to get up earlier and take the poor dog a good walk , like a responsible dog owner does, or is she just going to neglect the poor thing?

I'm up at 6am to walk the dog....it is doable. If it is her dog, then she is being lazy. Presumably she gets to lie in on Saturday and Sunday when you walk the dog?
If no one is willing, get a dog walker. If as a couple you can't do that, rehome the dog to someone who is willing to put themselves out for the dog.

Rehome the dog if neither of you can be arsed to look after it properly. Having a dog is a lifestyle choice, not a necessity.

There is nothing in the OP saying the dog is DP though. Actually im sure tye OP would have highlighted that fa t heavily if it was.
My understanding is that the dog is both their responsibility. Therefore there is no reason why the OP shouldn’t step up too.

I get up at 5.50 to walk our dog. It's not my favourite time to get up, but needs must!

She just needs to get her arse out of bed earlier. Simple!

But why should the OP now walk the dog every day of the week when the DP leaves later to go to work, has a shorter commute and gets home earlier?

The logical thing to do is to stick to the current schedule because otherwise the OP is responsible for every morning dog walk despite having a longer commute and working day and therefore taking on all responsibility for the dog.

How is that reasonable?

I suspects she already does that and doesn’t want to ALSO walk dog every am because it’s inconvenient for the OP.

In that case either A) one or both of you get up earlier short walk am off to work then a longer walk at lunch time or B) book and pay for a dog walker or take to doggy day care or C) Re home the poor dog.

I start work at the same time as your DP and have the same commute. I get up at 6am to walk my dog for 1hr. It’s perfectly doable, so no reason your DP can’t do it.

I never said the OP should do all the walks. In balking at their attitude!!
It’s all me me me and nothing about the effort their partner is doing or the inconvenience it would create.
The OP only steps up when it works for them!

The OP should talk to their DP. They should get to a compromise.
That compromise should take into account the fact the DP is also doing all the afternoon/evening walks when they come back home.
It should take into account the fact DP works part time - but we have no idea what part time means. It could be 16 hours or it could 32 hours a week.
And it should take into account the fact the OP’s work is more flexible. They just dint fancy working until 6.00pm
And it should take into account all the other stuff that the OP is or isn’t doing in the house (cooking, cleaning, shopping etc etc). The longer commute/longer hours at work can only account for so much.

Akso no reason why the OP can’t do it too right?

She's being unreasonable expecting you to walk the dog every morning. She has a shorter commute and working day, so should get up earlier to walk the dog before work.

Nothing apart from the title.

Poor dog sounds like a chore to you both. Surely walking the dog should be enjoyable ?
Why did you get a dog ?
Do you get a dog walker during the day at least ? It’s a long lonely and boring day for the dog otherwise.

Id suggest a dog walker for the morning if neither of you can agree on this.

So far neither person has had to walk the dog in the morning before a commute (other than some Fridays it seems when OP doesn’t wfh). Now they are both commuting Mon-Thu those days should be split between them. Plus OP has been doing 3 days to the DP’s 4. But yes the DP shouldn’t have assumed and the balance of the dog’s other walks should also be considered

Says DP’s dog walk, not DP’s dog.

She sounds a nightmare. Poor dog. If she cant be arsed getting up a bit earlier to walk the dog then hire a dog walker or put poor dog in doggy daycare. Hope the dog isn't left alone for hours or time to rehome the poor dog.

Honestly I think you have bigger problems than the dog.

Your relationship seems very competitive and unhelpful.
Do you want to help each other?
Work as a team?
Doesn't seem like it.

Poor dog.

There’s a living creature in the middle of this. Grow up the pair of you.

You do Monday, Wednesday, Friday, Sunday.
She does Tuesday, Thursday Saturday.

That way you swap who does 3 and who does 4. You both get a weekend lie in and a weekend dog walk.

You only have 2 office days with a dog walk out of 4.

In our household, we would want to walk the dog together and, if the dog is home alone all day then we book a dog sitter. But those two issues are additional to / separate from the conundrum you raise.

She needs to get a grip and get up earlier!

Who does the evening walk? If there is one.
Yanbu, DP can get up earlier.