To expect coffee?!?!

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I've never posted a thread before. Please be kind to me as this is extremely serious and I might cry. Well, moderately serious

A couple of us have come to stay with friends who have recently moved away. I woke up early, as is normal for me. We've been told to help ourselves to breakfast etc if we want.

They do not have any coffee in their house. None. Zero. Nothing 😱

These are old friends of mine and wonderful people, and they used to drink the odd coffee but more tea drinkers really - but I was expecting some sort of coffee available. They're probably gonna have a lot of "down from London" visitors to stay now they've moved.

I have spent half an hour googling where I can get coffee on a Sunday morning round here. The options are limited or not early morning enough. I am beside myself. Or I would be if I had enough caffeine in my system to get a head of steam on.

YABU: bring your own coffee next time. These guys are now living a simple coffee free life in the country, get away with your high and mighty big city ways and bring your own

YANBU: it's normal to expect a bit of coffee in a house in this day and age. You'll be doing your hosts a favour if you mention this, or they're going to face hordes of desperate visitors with a dreadful level of unmet need in this new, country living phase of their lives, and the local community will be ravaged by coffee starved londoners desperately roaming the streets early doors like a host of annoying affluent zombies in nice trainers

This would be awful for me too.

I bloody love my morning coffee. Thoughts and prayers!

I'd feel the same as you, but also can't really blame the hosts. Hope you find coffee soon.

I keep coffee in the freezer. Just wondering if they aren't coffee drinkers if there's any chance they do the same? I have been told off by my father when I don't before, because he says the coffee goes off otherwise.

I’m going with Deliberate Ploy To Put Off Visitors.

No London Wanker type would ever have really have no coffee. It’s practically the law to have several types of tea and at least two methods of making coffee in every London Wanker abode.

A lovely glass of tap water.

I bet you wouldn’t get a slice of cake or a biscuit either. Maybe you’re offered a stick of celery or a slice of apple if you’re being decadent and fancy a sweet treat?

I loved the idea of these, but was really disappointed with the coffee- but I will give them another go.

So you’re almost in tears at the idea of no coffee rather than the reality of withdrawal? That’s a serious psychological addiction, not simply a physical one. I do get it though. I’m more of a tea drinker and use loose leaf tea (the hard stuff 🤣) and when I’m not at home I don’t just miss the ‘proper’ tea, but also the ritual of making it. As soon as I start making it, my brain gets a kick out of the anticipation. As for decaf. Yuck. I can tell the difference in taste, let alone effect, with tea. Not so much with coffee though as I only drink it once a day -sometimes less - and am nowhere near as sensitive to the flavour.

We don't all live in London. Some of us don't even live in cities. Or towns. Or even villages.

We don't have instant coffee in the house - when we do it tends to dry up and clump and be undrinkable because we don't use it. We do however have a coffee machine (barista, not pod) but if you don't know how to use it, you'd be equally as stuck!

So, if they are really good friends, surely you know they don’t drink coffee? Why would they have a cafetière and ground beans on hand ‘just in case’?

Instant, even the good stuff, goes off I’ve found. I think if you know someone doesn’t drink coffee you bring your own… or you make do with tea. As much as I am a coffee fiend (we have a huge bean to cup coffee machine), I’d have no expectations of being offered decent coffee at any home I visit (and take it as a pleasant surprise if I was) and try to be a grown up about it?

I was hoping there would be a similar comment, I’m surprised by this thread at how dependent people are on coffee. I don’t have tea and sugar at home and only very have occasionally milk.

We have loads of soft drinks in our house, I drink Diet Coke if I want coffee (yes sometimes in the morning 🤫)

My DP bought a jar of coffee a long time ago, we had a new kitchen fitted and left it out for the kitchen fitters, it was 2 years out of date but we hadn’t noticed because no one drinks it, my mum always brought her own tea bags and most people we know have always been happy with cold drinks or alcohol, we do have a LOT of choices for alcohol. As the booze is far more expensive I always believed we are good hosts.

We have been on a few trips recently where hotels have had multiple hot drink options in the room that we brought home, we will keep them for guests and workmen!

Not a fan of friends then? - 'it's all moo' 😂

Just that it's irrelevant.

I’ve just been to visit an old friend who is a tea drinker. I brought coffee bags with me.

I agree! I can't stand the smell or taste of the stuff and I hate making it for other people. I think there might be a small jar of instant in the cupboard but it's probably out of date but it'll do if someone really wanted a cup.

we do have a LOT of choices for alcohol. As the booze is far more expensive I always believed we are good hosts.

I could accept that, but be warned i would be drinking booze in place of coffee. A good coffee liqueur would work in the morning 😂😂
I need to get myself fit for human interaction

Another vote for checking facilities in advance so I’d know whether to pack the aeropress.

I don’t drink coffee on an empty stomach but would not enjoy a holiday without good coffee available when I want it.

Depending on the region I’d be checking on water too. Thames Valley tap water really needs to be filtered to be palatable, while tap water in Scotland is delicious.

Yanbu. I don’t drink coffee but we have a jar of coffee in the house for those who visit and prefer it to tea!
who are these weirdos?!

I bet there is coffee hidden away at the back of the cupboard somewhere, but you missed it in your frantic searching.

They’ve probably stuck it in a decorative tin that they didn’t know what else to do with, and it’s got pushed right to the back.

I always get fruit tea in for MIL - she only visits every 4 months or so. Every time I think “I’m sure I bought some tea for her last time”, fail to find it, buy more, then some time after she has left find where DH carefully stored the last lot in some random vessel - a little ceramic pot marked “sugar”, underneath a packet of lentils in a glass jar, behind the microwave in an ice cream tub etc.

I think it is normal to have coffee around when you have visitors, unless you forgot to mention that they live in a country where coffee just isn't available or isn't culturally expected. For all those who are saying "just drink tea instead" - not everybody likes both. I don't, and would only drink tea in a real emergency, which I don't think this is yet. (For anyone else who doesn't like tea and occasionally has to drink it, the trick is to drink it black and very, very weak, so it's essentially water with a slight kick to it.)

I would tough it out for now, then get some coffee as soon as a shop opens and tell them what you're doing but in a friendly, not confrontational way - "hope you don't mind but I couldn't find any coffee anywhere and I really fancied some, so I'll pop out and get a jar now, do you need anything else while I'm there?" (They might then say "oh sorry, forgot the mention the coffee is in such-and-such a place," but if they don't, they're unlikely to be actively offended as you're offering to do them a favour too.)

I'm with you OP. I need a coffee as soon as I get up. I don't always fancy a second cup during the day, but that first one is a non-negotiable and I feel like I haven't begun the day without it.

Some great suggestions for future-proofing but I agree a petrol station is your best bet. I'd be in my car already hitting the A-Roads looking for a Costa at this point.

Let us know how you get on!

Taylor's coffee bags are the answer. We never travel without them

Same. There's a lot of us about!!

We have tea and coffee but we don't routinely have milk, so any unexpected visitors would have to drink it black, as my husband and I do.

I don’t drink coffee but daughter and husband do so I’d have an array to offer you. However DO NOT turn up at my door and ask for a hot chocolate because that’s all you drink. Fuck off Louise, you’re 53

Having said that, since my daughter moved back home, there are three Whittards hot chocolate, and four flavours of bastard Nesquik. I’m not resentful at all about how much space it takes up

If you literally cannot start your day without drinking coffee, you're the one with the problem.

We don't drink coffee and it's forever slipping our mind to keep stocked. We have a jar of instant for when people come over and want one, including tradespeople etc, as none of our family drink it - and it's always going out of date, or turning into one solid block, as we never use it.

I would expect coffee, as in it's normal.to have some around even if you don't drink it for guests, i would have thought? We're a non tea house but always have some in for visitors. Having said that my dad rarely has coffee in even when we are visiting as he doesn't drink it. He always caters very well and has great booze though, so swings and roundabouts!