To expect coffee?!?!

[ReplacementBusService]

I've never posted a thread before. Please be kind to me as this is extremely serious and I might cry. Well, moderately serious

A couple of us have come to stay with friends who have recently moved away. I woke up early, as is normal for me. We've been told to help ourselves to breakfast etc if we want.

They do not have any coffee in their house. None. Zero. Nothing 😱

These are old friends of mine and wonderful people, and they used to drink the odd coffee but more tea drinkers really - but I was expecting some sort of coffee available. They're probably gonna have a lot of "down from London" visitors to stay now they've moved.

I have spent half an hour googling where I can get coffee on a Sunday morning round here. The options are limited or not early morning enough. I am beside myself. Or I would be if I had enough caffeine in my system to get a head of steam on.

YABU: bring your own coffee next time. These guys are now living a simple coffee free life in the country, get away with your high and mighty big city ways and bring your own

YANBU: it's normal to expect a bit of coffee in a house in this day and age. You'll be doing your hosts a favour if you mention this, or they're going to face hordes of desperate visitors with a dreadful level of unmet need in this new, country living phase of their lives, and the local community will be ravaged by coffee starved londoners desperately roaming the streets early doors like a host of annoying affluent zombies in nice trainers

I don’t drink coffee but always have some in for guests. They probably didn’t think given they don’t drink it.

I take emergency coffee bags away.

If I didn't drink coffee, I wouldn't have any in the house either. I would probably warn people who were coming to stay so they could bring their own though.
Do they have tea? If it's just for emergency caffeine (and i REALLY understand that), then I'd drink tea if it's available, even if I really didn't like it.
Otherwise, are there any corner shops or newsagents open or petrol stations nearby where they might have a Costa machine or at least sell a jar of instant coffee?

Edited for autocorrect typos

Not round here.
However, we have a petrol station that has a coffee machine half a mile away.

Taylor's coffee bags are the answer. We never travel without them.

I mean, they're London wankers too

Oh gosh this is a nightmare situation.
only 15 minutes until the petrol station opens.
Id be waiting by the door!

Coffee bags from Waitrose are your friend.

Make a decent cup. Far better than instant coffee and portable

I take coffee bags everywhere- both decaf and caffeinated!

I have a careful balance of the two that must be maintained 🤣

Alternatively, take decaf everywhere but carry caffeine pils!

I think its weird not having coffee in the house. I don't drink it (I drink tea) but it's not onerous to just have some in the cupboard for visitors.

Your friends are clearly monsters.

Have you checked the fridge?

If they’ve just moved and don’t really drink coffee it’s not unreasonable for them not to have any in, there’s lots of stuff to get ready when hosting and so it would be an easy oversight to make. It’s not a big deal to go without coffee for a few hours, or even a day, especially as there is tea available. Just buy some when you can and leave it when you go home so it’s there for next time.

I don't have coffee in my house. Disgusting stuff. Doesn't even feature on my radar so wouldn't think to get some in for guests.

Years ago when I was fully caffeinated, I was staying with my sister and began to feel really ill. I put it down to the sofa bed being wonky and my feet possibly being higher than my head.

Heading home feeling grim I stopped for a coffee at a services and instantly felt better. She’d been decaffing me the whole visit.

I'd be beside myself too. A morning tea just doesn't hit the spot like a morning coffee! I get a weird sluggishy feeling and headache if I don't have a coffee in the morning (which I know sounds terrible and I should really address that dependency).

This is urgent op. I say that with the utmost sincerity.

Christ are you a monster

Now musing over the etiquette of buying a jar of coffee and whether to leave it behind with the hosts…

They have my moved. So haven’t had time to pick up bits and pieces that they might otherwise have in.

I only have fruit teas for guests, but it took a while to get them in (probably after a guest asked for some and I didn’t have any). Drink some tea or go to a garage and buy some instant.

Stay strong my friend - nearly 8am now....

Do you never have overnight guests or even anyone round for a cuppa?

I would get coffee in if I'm hosting coffee drinkers.

Nowadays, your self-respecting London wanker host stocks not only tea and coffee (caf) with milk (including skimmed) and sugar, but also both options in decaf, a selection of herbal teas, sweetener and non-dairy milk including oat and nut options.

That said, if someone asks for skimmed milk in my house, I just dilute semi-skimmed with water 😂.

Omg. I would DIE.

I don’t drink coffee so I don’t have any. I wouldn’t get any for guests (but our house isn’t big enough to host any anyway so it’s the opinion of a cow) because IME people are weird about coffee as it has to be some thing I don’t understand that involves equipment, not instant. As instant is wrong somehow. I don’t know, I don’t understand. But it’s enough to make me just avoid coffee. (And guests)

We don’t have tea bags or milk in the house but would buy them if we had guests

When I was younger and living in my first flat I didn't really drink tea or coffee and never at home, but always had both in for guests and decaf once I started dating DH and saw that's all MIL drinks. It's polite.
Having said that I wouldn't be bothered if I visited someone who had neither as whilst I know drink both tea and coffee, it's still only occasional.