Page 14 | DD friend is a furry/therian. Trying to encourage (strongly) my DD to be the same.

VeggPatch · 07/04/2025 23:03

PeekabooRoots · 07/04/2025 22:51

oh and you know what. I’m a teacher. The biggest issues in schools, not bloody therians, but the the batshit crazy rude entitled parents like all the ones here. Dealing with you lot of the shittest part of the job by a long way.

What an awful attitude for a teacher.

That book sounds like it might be one of those grooming books intended to introduce adults themes to children. Like the grandpa book aimed at young kids that brought up girls having unnecessary double mastectomy and an old man in his fetish gear. All in the name of ‘inclusivity’. Would you be able to spot a grooming book?

This is one of the most inadvertently funny things I've ever read. Warrior Cats has been going for years, much like Sweet Valley High or the Babysitters Club or the various pony books my friends were into (although I think Sweet Valley High was far worse than Warrior Cats for impressionable minds). It's not high literature but it's not grooming either.

Feelinglost10 · 07/04/2025 23:54

Sockmate123 · 06/04/2025 18:04

What would you do in this situation? Child in class is 'recruiting' other children (mainly very quiet children) to be furries. She says she is a therian and presents as a wolf. School has banned her wearing wolf items to school but she still does on party days/world book day/non uniform etc
Parents seem to do littke about it
Quite older parents. Children are 10. My DD has so far not engaged but likes the child involved but is being pressured. It was her birthday recently and friend bought her a tail 🙄

I think this is completely weird. Child digs holes at lunch time, barks at people etc cute/acceptable up until age 5 or 6 but not girls that are on the cusp of puberty!

AIBU?
Yes- she's only a kid, will spon grow out of it.
No - its weird, school and parents should do more to address it

I shouldn’t laugh but…🙈

surely this isn’t a real thing?!

GabriellaFaith · 08/04/2025 00:23

kidditsonyou · 06/04/2025 18:14

Yes it’s weird and wrong but it’s really nothing to do with you, worry about your own child.
you can encourage your dd to distance herself, not invite this child anywhere if you want but you can’t dictate how they dress and behave.

I disagree with this because her daughter is being regularly exposed to this behaviour and thereby normalising it etc.

There is also the issue of the present, and bribes and peer pressure teachers should be made aware of.

Floatlikeafeather2 · 08/04/2025 00:26

Flopsy145 · 07/04/2025 20:38

It's the truth though, that child is not normal and is not mentally well, the child needs help but my child would not be responsible for coddling or carrying on this pretend play. So if the school took issue with it and decided to chastise me for saying that instead of parents allowing their child to pretend to be a fucking animal then I would very happily decide that that particular school was not the right environment for my child. I would either move school or home school. Easy.

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As I said, your prerogative. But it might not be the school you have to reckon with if you are in the habit of labelling people "mentally unwell" and "not normal".

Codlingmoths · 08/04/2025 00:30

VeggPatch · 07/04/2025 22:29

Here you go @Codlingmoths

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And now I’ve replied to that one person, rather than implying the whole thread is like that. It’s not.

2JFDIYOLO · 08/04/2025 00:36

We did play horses when we were kids, but we were younger than that.

I saw a woman walking down the road with a girl who looked about 14. The girl was wearing a big plushy fox tail, that was sticky out and bobbed about as she walked.

crumblingschools · 08/04/2025 00:45

@2JFDIYOLO I assume when you played horses, you were a ‘horse’ during the game but once the game was over you were no longer a horse.

Some children nowadays want to be treated as a ‘horse’ all the time, not just during a game.

MoreChocPls · 08/04/2025 04:51

Sorry but the girl and her family need a good talking to and social services. She’s 10 FFS. She get bullied to hell in secondary school. It’s ridiculous and the parents should have put a stop to it long ago.

DeskJotter · 08/04/2025 05:39

Gffgdc · 07/04/2025 20:09

I thought your later posts agreed with me

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Maybe I got the wrong gist from your post. I thought you were saying that the child deserves to be bullied?

DeskJotter · 08/04/2025 05:42

LadyMonicaBaddingham · 07/04/2025 20:21

Yes, but she was PRETENDING to be a horse, she wasn't 'identifying' as one. She knew she wasn't a horse, she was playing. It seems that, now, someone would insist that her school dinner was served in a fucking nosebag or something. Let children play without pathologising it, for goodness' sake. !

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But you're the one pathologising it.

And she hasn't asked for a nose bag. She pretends to be a wolf during lunch break. Just playing.

DeskJotter · 08/04/2025 05:47

Flopsy145 · 07/04/2025 20:38

It's the truth though, that child is not normal and is not mentally well, the child needs help but my child would not be responsible for coddling or carrying on this pretend play. So if the school took issue with it and decided to chastise me for saying that instead of parents allowing their child to pretend to be a fucking animal then I would very happily decide that that particular school was not the right environment for my child. I would either move school or home school. Easy.

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Wowsers. And what if another kid pretended to be Harry Potter during break time, and another kid pretended to be a celebrity, and another kid pretended to be a vampire? These are all fun things that kids play at. Do you let your child play? Are they rewlly not allowed to pretend? Do you think pretending means a child is "mentally unwell"?

please don't homeschool your child, they need to be in a healthier environment than that.

DeskJotter · 08/04/2025 05:48

caringcarer · 07/04/2025 20:49

My niece used to play being a mermaid and had a mermaid outfit with fin tail. She would put it on the moment she got home from school until she went to bath and bed. She knew she was a girl playing at being a mermaid though. There is a big difference between a DC knowing they are human but playing at being something else to actually believing they are something else.

Why is there "a big difference"? It's just semantics.

DeskJotter · 08/04/2025 05:50

PeekabooRoots · 07/04/2025 21:05

Obviously I’m not saying that 🙄. I’m just saying that a nine year old (OP mentioned that the 10 yr old had been doing this for a year) should not be thinking about ‘lesbian dating’.

Knowing about lesbians - yes, but a 9 year old thinking of herself ‘dating’ anyone is too young. Combine that with the ‘furries’ and she’s not in a good place.

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There's a few kids "dating" in my daughter's class. It means absolutely nothing, no kissing or even hand holding! Seems like it's the lesbian part that's throwing you. Reflect on that.

DeskJotter · 08/04/2025 05:54

Cigarettesandbooze · 07/04/2025 22:20

I would have probably said this was totally made up only for the fact that last summer I was in the park and spotted a blue haired teenager whose gender was unclear with a younger tween who was sporting a fox tail and prancing around like said fox. It was utterly bizarre.

But so what? I bet they seemed happy.

DeskJotter · 08/04/2025 05:55

PeekabooRoots · 07/04/2025 22:33

“yes she has said for the past year she was a lesbian and was 'dating' another furry in the class”

Suggesting that it’s not desirable for a child to be quite so caught up in ideas of herself and adult concepts of sexuality is not homophobic. Hence I said she shouldn’t be thinking about dating ‘anyone’ aged 9. HTH.

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Interesting that you didn't just say "dating", then.

DeskJotter · 08/04/2025 05:57

PeekabooRoots · 07/04/2025 22:45

Do point out where I said there is little difference between furries and lesbians 🙄🙄That is now something you and the other poster have made up.

I mentioned the two things because they are the two things this little girl is into and as I said before, it’s fine for kids to know about lesbians but claiming to be a lesbian (which involves being sexually attracted to women) at age 9 implies a level of sexuality inappropriate for children. She claims to be a furry at age 9 (see, I’ve even separated the sentences so you can’t keep accusing me of comparing the two) which is inappropriate.

It’s sad that you can’t see that these behaviours are inappropriate for a 9 yr old and resort to attacking me for mentioning it.

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I fancied boys at 9. It's not unusual.

DeskJotter · 08/04/2025 05:58

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DeskJotter · 08/04/2025 06:02

crumblingschools · 08/04/2025 00:45

@2JFDIYOLO I assume when you played horses, you were a ‘horse’ during the game but once the game was over you were no longer a horse.

Some children nowadays want to be treated as a ‘horse’ all the time, not just during a game.

God forbid!

DeskJotter · 08/04/2025 06:03

MoreChocPls · 08/04/2025 04:51

Sorry but the girl and her family need a good talking to and social services. She’s 10 FFS. She get bullied to hell in secondary school. It’s ridiculous and the parents should have put a stop to it long ago.

Bullied by people like you.

it's generally better to target the person doing the bullying than telling the bullied kid to "be more normal".

Swiftie1878 · 08/04/2025 06:21

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2023/06/20/rye-college-children-neo-pronouns-cats-moons-rishi-sunak/

just one of many examples

Jumpers4goalposts · 08/04/2025 06:34

PeekabooRoots · 07/04/2025 22:45

Do point out where I said there is little difference between furries and lesbians 🙄🙄That is now something you and the other poster have made up.

I mentioned the two things because they are the two things this little girl is into and as I said before, it’s fine for kids to know about lesbians but claiming to be a lesbian (which involves being sexually attracted to women) at age 9 implies a level of sexuality inappropriate for children. She claims to be a furry at age 9 (see, I’ve even separated the sentences so you can’t keep accusing me of comparing the two) which is inappropriate.

It’s sad that you can’t see that these behaviours are inappropriate for a 9 yr old and resort to attacking me for mentioning it.

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I’m sorry but you are so wrong. Kids know or think that they are straight at this age so why would they not know or think they are a lesbian it doesn’t mean that they are thinking of or being exposed to sexual content. My DD’s friend in Y5 started to tell her closest friends that she was gay and it related more to her idolism of female role models and crush’s than anything else. Shes still gay now in Y8. It’s no different to any other child at that age.

PeekabooRoots · 08/04/2025 07:40

VeggPatch · 07/04/2025 23:03

This is one of the most inadvertently funny things I've ever read. Warrior Cats has been going for years, much like Sweet Valley High or the Babysitters Club or the various pony books my friends were into (although I think Sweet Valley High was far worse than Warrior Cats for impressionable minds). It's not high literature but it's not grooming either.

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Yes the phenomenon of grooming books being promoted to children, sometimes in schools, is hilarious isn’t it 🙄.
I haven’t read it but if it is encouraging kids to call themselves ‘therians’ as someone pointed out then it has the same negative effect even if unintentional.

PeekabooRoots · 08/04/2025 07:48

DeskJotter · 08/04/2025 05:50

There's a few kids "dating" in my daughter's class. It means absolutely nothing, no kissing or even hand holding! Seems like it's the lesbian part that's throwing you. Reflect on that.

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No it’s the fact that so many adults are perfectly happy with the idea of primary school kids ‘dating’ and talking about grown up sexualities. I used the word lesbian because that is what the child has said. As I mentioned, I’d still have an issue with ‘dating’ anyone in primary school. Then combine that either way her interest in ‘furries’ and it’s not good.

Maybe you should reflect on why children are being driven into this at an ever younger age and why you’re cheering it on? Where’s it going to stop?

You and others are so desperate for me to be homophobic but I’m not - sorry to disappoint.

UrsulasHerbBag · 08/04/2025 08:09

This little girl (she is only ten) sounds like she is being emotionally neglected, she may be ND or not but she sounds very vulnerable. Safeguarding is every bodies responsibility. She isn’t some weird little deviant but shes very vulnerable to actual adult weird deviants who like to find vulnerable young people. OP is aware of the murky side of all this and worried that her child is being pressured into something that could lead into a dangerous situation. A little girl playing at being a wolf is not being sexualised by anyone decent but please find out more about the people that do target these children and keep yours safe. FYI always be wary of the apologists or those normalising access to vulnerable children.

Gffgdc · 08/04/2025 08:15

DeskJotter · 08/04/2025 05:39

Maybe I got the wrong gist from your post. I thought you were saying that the child deserves to be bullied?

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I thought you were saying that as well? Do you not think some teasing would make the person act normal?

People would say "ewwww" to me when I picked my nose at school so I stopped doing that