DD friend is a furry/therian. Trying to encourage (strongly) my DD to be the same.

[Sockmate123]

What would you do in this situation? Child in class is 'recruiting' other children (mainly very quiet children) to be furries. She says she is a therian and presents as a wolf. School has banned her wearing wolf items to school but she still does on party days/world book day/non uniform etc
Parents seem to do littke about it
Quite older parents. Children are 10. My DD has so far not engaged but likes the child involved but is being pressured. It was her birthday recently and friend bought her a tail 🙄

I think this is completely weird. Child digs holes at lunch time, barks at people etc cute/acceptable up until age 5 or 6 but not girls that are on the cusp of puberty!

AIBU?
Yes- she's only a kid, will spon grow out of it.
No - its weird, school and parents should do more to address it

Do a bit of reading. It’s rife.

There are thousands of posts on here from teachers; this is not an issue that comes up as "making their lives hell". They talk about lots of things that make their lives hell. This just doesn't rate.

I have autism, so does my daughter, so does my son (all NHS diagnosed).

I have, and will continue to advise my dc to stay away from people who try to force you to do things you don't want to. Life is hard enough with autism, without getting sucked into the frankly bizarre online world of fetishes and special clubs that will isolate them far more.

There is a difference between normal childhood play (pretending to be an animal in a playground or at home) and with 'furries' (online terminology being used, massive risk of grooming, actually trying to act/dress like like animal in lessons or where it is inappropriate).

@DeskJotter It maybe a child playing make belief but if they identify as Furry or Therian they could be exposed to all sorts of horribleness and as a parent you have to be one step ahead to be able to protect them from it. Can’t be naive thinking it is just a game. You can have all the parental controls you want on their tech but they may be able to see all sorts on a friend’s phone.

There is a horrible world out there that our young DC can access so easily now and as parents we cannot blithely say it is just a game and there is no possible harm. There could be incredible harm and a child may unwittingly be harmed as they too think it is just a game of dress up, but Google something about being a Therian and see something they really shouldn’t or connect with someone they shouldn’t

Yes, avoid anyone sincerely trying to put spells on you and others. I respect that some adults are bona-fide witches. But anyone practicing “religion or beliefs” to convert others at school should be avoided.

Probably just a very imaginative child, who may end up at cosplay conventions when she's a teen, and find her type of friend there. Edit for spelling.

This girl isn't the OP's daughter's problem.

Oof

My Dd went through this stage at a similar age and actually until about 12. She’s the very youngest of her friends and actually I think she was still playing make believe games - there is just a e for it now. I’m please to report making tails from wool and being a wolf seems to have been left behind now she is nearly 14! I put ground rules in place - absolutely no wearing tails etc out of the house etc and we discussed it. I was happy with the fact she definitely thought of herself as human 😂.
give a dose of common sense occasionally without crushing her imagination and she’ll some out of it OP.

Definitely, she doesn’t have access to search engines and only watches children’s YouTube. This is not a product of something untoward, just a product of imagination and belief in reincarnation.

It just means someone who identifies as an animal, no? Not any particular animal.

It's a word that had a taxonomic meaning before it was coopted to mean "weird and wonderful identity'.

Luckily for us, words can be coopted to mean "weird and wonderful" things. Life is joyous! Are you?

Luckily for us, words can be coopted to mean "weird and wonderful" things. Life is joyous! Are you?

Luckily for us, words can be coopted to mean "weird and wonderful" things. Life is joyous! Are you?

Rarely twice in a row, no.

In this context, it's fairly clear what was meant.

True, but you did ask why I'd mentioned marsupials, so I thought I'd explain!

I had a “ boyfriend” in grade 4. He bought me a Michael Jackson puzzle for Christmas. That was the extent of our relationship.

Lots of kids have boyfriends and girlfriends at that age. It doesn’t actually mean anything.

Why would her being gay make a difference?

"DD you can be a wolf like little Angelica if you want to. But just be aware you'll be getting Pedigree Chum for tea and you'll be going in the kennels while Dad and I are in Tenerife"

Should solve all potential issues

Kids pretend to be witches due to Harry Potter all the time. It’s really not that serious.

Yeah but the kid doesn't believe she is a wolf either does she - a wolf wouldn't go to school, have a bedroom with posters, sleep in a bed or do all the other things she does. She just pretends to be a wolf and wears some dressing up clothes. I am not sure why schools allow it - if they all do

If she turns out to be gay when she’s older - no problem - but this girl is clearly being exposed to inappropriate concepts of adult sexuality like furries and lesbian dating and that’s not ok.

At last, a sensible response

When my DD went to secondary school she told me about furries there’s about 30 of them at her large secondary. It is weird.