My mum is withholding my inheritance from my grandfather because of ideological reasons

[Camde]

None of this is confirmed, but I have strong suspicions.

my grandfather sadly passed away last year. He owned a very successful business, and was very generous with all his grand kids.

since he died, I have heard my mother (his daughter) and uncle having conversations about dealing with the inheritance from him. For context, I know that my uncle received enough to pay off all the mortgage on his new £1.2m house, so I know my mum likely received a similar amount.

My grandfather also told me before he passed a few times that I’d be receiving a good inheritance and shouldn’t waste it.

the issue is, my mother is very ideologically opposed to the idea of she or her kids inheriting money. She is very left wing, and believes that it is immoral for some people to receive inheritances when others don’t receive anything. Therefore, she has refused her portion of the inheritance.

it also means that I have no idea how much I have inherited. She is the executor of the will, and I have not seen it. I only ask as I’m saving up to buy a house, and it would be great to know whether I’m likely to receive any money to help with a deposit.

Every time I’ve asked her about my inheritance, she gets very angry and accuses me of not loving my grandfather and only caring about his money, which isn’t true.

how do I deal with this? I don’t want to fall out with my mum over this, and she is still very much grieving.

@Camde I've only read your posts OP, so forgive me if I'm repeating what's already been advised. Once Probate has been granted to the Executor(s) of a Will, it becomes a matter of public record and you can search the Probate Registry for the documents: https://probatesearch.service.gov.uk/help Requesting a copy of a Will and/or Grant of Probate will not alert the Executor(s).
Executor(s) have a legal duty to disburse the deceased's estate precisely in line with the Will, so if you are a beneficiary of your GF's Will, your DM would be breaking the law by not paying you what has been bequeathed to you by him.
I really don't think there's any point in saying anything further to your DM about this until you have established if your GF did, in fact, include you in his Will - you need to find out the answer to this before you anything else.

Are you absolutely sure you were named in the will? It seems unlikely to me given the circumstances. If uncle has already received his inheritance of more than a million, then probate must already have been granted. And it would be really unusual if probate for such a large estate wasn't handed by solicitors even if family were appointed as executors. Solicitors would obviously have contacted all beneficiaries, yet you haven't been contacted...

I think this is more likely to be the case.

My mother is a solicitor, although she doesn’t specialise in wills, she does corporate law. I’m not sure whether they’ve hired a separate solicitor or if she felt qualified to deal with it herself.

i have requested a copy of the will on that website, thank you to those who shared it! It’s entirely possible I wasn’t named. I don’t mind if I’m not, it would just be good to know for planning purposes really.

It will certainly be interesting to find out if you have been named, as if so, not only is she committing a crime by not ensuring you receive your share of any inheritance, she could be struck off by her profession.

Perhaps your grandfather thought his daughter would share it with her children.

You should get the Will quickly.

Glad that you are starting to find out.

But purely out of curiosity, what does your mother think should happen to a persons estate when they die? Money they have worked for and saved. Where does she think that it should go?

I am very left wing but I believe that a person has a right to decided what to do with their own money or property. I wonder if perhaps this has more to do with her relationship with your grandfather and his politics than her actual beliefs about inheritance in general.

Did you go on to the right website? It should be instantly downloadable so you shouldn’t have to wait?

A will is a public record once probate has happened, you are able to check, nobody has the right to know. The website is a pain in the bum but you can find the will and pay a couple of quid. If you are in it and your mum hasn't paid it then I'd have a word and tell her you are legally entitled and that you will get a solicitor if needed.

As a solicitor, I have to say that I’ve never heard of a “very left wing” corporate lawyer! Interesting. It seems she manages to sideline her values in one part of her life at least.

If your mother is a practicing Solicitor, she would have to be prepared to commit a very serious crime (estate fraud on a large scale), risk her career and jail time to do this. Does that really seem likely?

I agree, which is why I questioned above whether this is actually personal but the mother is passing it off a political ideology.

This. You just send off about £8 and they send you a copy. They do not tell anyone you have bought a copy of the will. If you are named or it states all DGC you have a right to the money and can take legal action against the executor if she withheld it from you.

This.

If she was a solicitor, she would know she could lose her practising certificate if she withheld money from someone that was rightfully theirs. Do check if you are a beneficiary.

Ultimately you can report her to the Solicitors Regulation Authority (SRA). Whether you want to do that to your mother is for you to decide.

Not if property or assets are going to for example surviving spouses. That’s automatic and doesnt involve probate

If your mother refused her inheritance, what happened to the money?

Maybe donated it to a shelter or something?
Bonkers really..
Also how hilarious that she’s a corporate lawyer, talking of not fair for some to have more than others…

If she signed a deed of variation then it probably went to the (now very happy) brother.

I do find it odd that your mother who is supposedly so intelligent has failed to realise that the world has changed and children need as much help as possible otherwise even if they follow the same career path as their parents they are still going to struggle.

Surely she sees the hypocrisy between what she says and what she does

I’ve looked at the will and I seem to be a beneficiary of it but it’s a discretionary trust. So it seems like it’s up to my mum as the executor whether I get any of the money in it. Have I understood that correctly?

No idea to be honest! She refuses to talk about it

If your mum refuses her share, then it will fall into the residue, so it depends per the will who is entitled to the residue.

if your share is via discretionary trust that makes it tough - who are the other beneficiaries of the discretionary trust? As with a discretionary trust the trustees have choice over who benefits (though they must be a discretionary beneficiary) and when. For example, let's say you and 4 siblings are discretionary beneficiaries. The trustees could choose to pay everything to one beneficiary.

All grandkids are beneficiaries, and it states that if one is paid, the others must all be paid an equal amount

Yes you have understood correctly.
The trustees can decide ( I assume your mum is both a trustee to the trust and the executor to the will )
how much is in the trust,
when it becomes available
and who benefits from it.

So basically your mum, as trustee ( if she is ) can make all of those decisions

Hmm, that is unusual for a discretionary trust - as the whole point is the trustees have to have discretion over who gets what, rather than it being prescriptive within the will.

I suppose the discretion here is that it says ‘if’ an amount is given to a beneficiary. I.e the trustee doesn’t have to give any of it to a beneficiary if they don’t want to?