to hate when people who don't know me use the shortened version of my name

[Haveapotato]

This happens in work ALL the time. Let's say I am called Elizabeth, but Liz to my friends / close work colleagues. I have no problem with being called Liz in conversation, but it's not what I go by in general and I always introduce myself / sign off my emails as Elizabeth, particularly when it's in a work context / introducing myself to clients.

I get so many emails from people I've never interacted with before starting with 'Hi Liz', or someone puts my name down as an action owner as 'Liz Smith'. It really riles me.

Whenever I email someone for the first time, I always use their first/full name as per their email address, then if they reply to me signing off with a using a shorter name I will use that going forward, but I'd never go straight in with 'Hi Jan' when the person's name is Janet.

AIBU?!

And yes I know I have too much time on my hands if this is all I have to worry about.....

I get this but not many people used the shortened version so it feels even more strange and intimate in a way. Those that use the shortened version haven’t heard it from someone else iyswim.

I despise that people think it is acceptable to shorten my name. That is not my name. The name I provided is the name I want used. If I wanted a shorter version used, that is how I would have introduced myself.

it’s incredibly rude.

if I introduce myself as John, people don’t respond with, Hello
Bob.

Yep me too. Nobody calls me any of the shortened versions of my name, not even my DH so why should Bob from accounts decide it's ok to?

Me too!

Entirely agree. I always go by the full version of my name and hate being shortened by some stranger being "friendly".

I have a name which doesn't have a shortened version like Susan/Sue more like Brenda/Bren but some customers at work shorten my name which annoys me. Only my friend of 45 years calls me by a shortened version and although everyone calls her by her shortened version I call her by her full name 😀.

Yep, can’t stand it.
If anyone other than my close family call me Peg I throw them out of my pub!

I realised long ago that getting upset about things that you can’t control is pointless

Oh yes, overly familiar! I find the Americans are the worst at uninvited shortening.

If you have a name that can easily be shortened to a common name, I think it’s part and parcel of the name you’ve got. Society has now moved past many formalities around naming conventions etc when speaking to people and this is a byproduct.

It’s a different issue if you’ve repeatedly corrected people (as annoying as that it to have to do) and they continue to use the shorter name. That’s just deliberately being an arse. However I doubt most people are intending to offend.

I have the the opposite. I introduce myself as ‘Marge’ and people call me ‘Margaret’ - yes it’s my full name but I don’t like it being used hence introducing myself by my nickname.

Agree, the shortened version of my name is actually a name in its own right so I feel like they are talking to someone else!
Also what I get a lot is being called by a very similar name by mistake, but my name is on my footer, it's not unusual so why wouldn't you check?? ( like Rowan instead of Ronan) It's always the same name, I swear under my breath every time!

Very rude.

I hate it when people shorten the phrase "To hate it when" to "To hate when".

I agree with you. It’s incredibly rude to not address someone by the name that you introduce yourself by. I’ve got a name that quite a few people shorten, to a version that I really hate. If people use that version of my name in a work or social situation, I ignore them because it’s not my name.

Do any of these people have friends/colleagues in common with you? If so, I'd expect them to have heard you referred to as Jen rather than Jennifer, and assume that's how you prefer to be addressed. If they don't know you from Adam, then they should follow your lead.

That would pee me off.
I have the opposite issue (sort of):
My name is something like Joanna, but I always shorten it to Jo.
SO many people ignore the fact that I sign everything as JO and then - to add insult to injury - call me bloody Joanne.
First world problem, I know, but it really fucks me off.

I'm the same as this.

I hate the full version of my name and always introduce myself by the shortened version. But the vast majority of people ignore the shortened version and call me by my full name.

Tbh this has been a serious issue for me most of my life because it plays into my feelings instilled in me by my family that what I want and feel isn't important and doesn't matter.

Now I'm older I've given up making an issue of if but it has diminished me as a person and quite frankly I feel what's the point in even trying to bother socialising with people if they care so little about me they can't be bothered to get my name right.

I think it blurs the lines if you’re happy for some colleagues to call you the nickname and not others - especially if they’re likely to refer to you in conversation about work, people will only hear of you as “Liz” then so won’t know any different.

YANBU. It is rude and presumptuous. I would tell them to stop it. Call you by your name, not a shortened version of it!

I don't mind in the least

My mum chose my brothers name precisely because it cannot be shortened, because she knew 40 odd years ago you can't control what random people do , especially when it's a common thing.

I hate this so much.

I get right in with: "I think I should bring up right away that I don't like my name shortened."

And then if I have to, I tell them every. Single. Time.

That's funny.

My mum gave me a name that couldn't be shortened. My name has one syllable.

Precisely because she told me that she hates people shortening her name.

My mum is Patricia. It gets shortened to pat. Or one that she hates the most, Patty.

I find that people who are presumptuous enough to shorten my name without asking/early on usually turn out to be twats/arses.