Page 21 | talk to me if you stupidly bought something £££ you couldnt really afford

WhyDidIDiddle · 2025-03-30T18:44:17+00:00

In my defence, I have had a horrible time featuring death which has left me on a swing between dark depression and f*ck it do it now you might be dead tomorrow. I bought a pair of shoes that I really liked but were a ridiculous amount to spend on shoes of any kind. I feel a bit sick when I think of it. I will keep them as its not bankrupting but it is stupid out of the savings money. I do like them but it was really really really stupid. No one should spend that much on a pair of shoes. Hoping I am not alone and someone can make me feel a bit better with similar tale that didn't end horribly.

wigsonthegreenandhatsforthelifting · 31/03/2025 21:35

WhyDidIDiddle · 31/03/2025 13:23

@Poppymeldrum @PoorUncleBarry

PoorUncleBarry · Yesterday 20:41
Don't beat yourself up Op. After I lost my mum, dad and sister in very quick and tragic circumstances I had a nervous breakdown. I started collecting the toys that I had once owned as a kid ... it racked up and now I have an entire room in my house kitted out in vintage kids toys and TV show merchandise. Makes me very happy being in there. Nobody knows but I'm well into the thousands now. Not in debt, I keep them dusted and I'm happy so fuck it.

It's interesting how many grief related posts there are on here. I totally identify @PoorUncleBarry and @Poppymeldrum

I think part of this sort of attraction towards toys, things you owned as a child, is totally driven by grief. It's about wanting to go back to a time when the parent/granddad was alive and all was safe in a world of school uniforms and toys. I know someone who spent a small fortune on recreating a Jellycat collection - and some of those discontinued lines are ultra ££££ on ebay.

Another way this thread has made me feel better is the point that if something gives you joy, that is really priceless and whatever is joyful to you is very personal. One man's fish knife is another man's lump of coal.

My eldest has loads of Jellycat toys. Says the most maddening thing is that she was collecting them long before they became a 'thing'! I also bought them some Jellycats when they were little so pieces 20+ now.

God I have a tonne of stuff round my house that must have cost a fortune. I started collecting Denby dinnerware and I have every single thing that was issued in my range in the last 35 years. Recently replaced a few plates and added more, using Tesco Clubcard which I learned about on MN.

I have two Wedgwood dinner services, one with all the bells and whistles, serving dishes, bread plates, teacup and saucers, coffee jug, teapot yada yada yada. Last used for my son's christening and he's 21... got a lot of it as wedding gifts. I've got at least 5 different sets of cutlery - none near £20k, but bravo @edwinbear!

I've every Harrod's Christmas Bear since 1987. I can't get my hands on 1986 and any time I've seen it, it's been mega-expensive. I also collect a certain brand of mugs and must have about 200+. I've also 200+ pair of shoes/boots/sandals and my bedroom is chaotic with clothes I have no room for. I could open a jewellers. I think I'm a little addicted to 'stuff'.

Probably my maddest purchase was as a student in 1982, living on a student grant and my Saturday job. I fell in love with a £100 pair of Renata Italian leather boots, and on impulse, I bought them. I loved those boots so much!! I don't know if they are still in my attic and what condition they would be in more than 40 years later!

Oh and I also have a lot of the Chalet School books from the 70s lurking in my roofspace. Plus Barbies, Sindys and all their rellies in a box!!

clickyteeclick · 31/03/2025 21:38

😂😂😂 no I’m brunette! I tick all the boxes for hairless success but alas no such luck!

DisneyTokyoNewbie · 31/03/2025 21:40

LillyPJ · 31/03/2025 21:32

How about helping out someone else who maybe doesn't have food, let alone posh cutlery? Or anyone else in need? Or donating to a charity?

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I don't believe that you give all of your spare cash to charity.

wigsonthegreenandhatsforthelifting · 31/03/2025 21:44

LillyPJ · 31/03/2025 21:32

How about helping out someone else who maybe doesn't have food, let alone posh cutlery? Or anyone else in need? Or donating to a charity?

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And you can't do both potentially?

We'll be a long time dead. Why can't we have some joy in our lives while we're here?!

evtheria · 31/03/2025 22:08

This has been a thoroughly amazing and great thread. Adding “20k cutlery” to my list of genuine mnetter identifiers.
It’s a good thing I don’t have much disposable income to actually use, because I’d definitely own a lot more expensive art materials (not an artist!) and probably 10 cats. When I was in my 20s, in a cheap house share, working lots of shifts at min wage, I bought a pure white, fluffy quad sheepskin rug from Habitat at £300+. Had to roll it up and lug it home on the tram, and enjoyed sprawling on it on my days off. Unfortunately I didn’t know to not leave it in sunlight, and even though I still have it in a cupboard it’s now yellowed :(

Arraminta · 31/03/2025 22:17

Katem90 · 31/03/2025 20:05

If I had 20k to burn on cutlery, I wouldn’t, I’d donate it somewhere where it was needed, instead of wasting it: that’s all I meant.

thats me

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Yes and what a very, very special person you are. Very.

Ponyfootymama · 31/03/2025 22:20

Great thread
We bought a beautiful Victorian mahogany wind out dining table when we had a big dining room (and would have been all for the fabulous cutlery to go with it…actually found a gorgeous monogrammed set at auction and bought that for about £120 I think).
Table cost about £1750. Didn’t regret it at all. Moved house and said table wouldn’t go through any door…lived wrapped in several layers of duvet in a shed on the yard for the next 6 years, before selling it last month for a huge £150. No one seems to want dining tables anymore, no matter how beautiful!
Live for the moment I say, buy the shoes, the car, the horse, the table, whatever makes your heart sing😍

Somethingsnapped · 31/03/2025 22:26

I went into a posh chocolate shop to buy a 'little' extra present for my sister's 50th birthday. After choosing a small box for her, dh and I decided to treat ourselves to a few small bits too, and also something for ds(4) who was with us. The total came to £120. I mean, we're no strangers to expensive chocolates, but this seemed insane for what we'd actually bought.

They weren't even very nice 😖

DressOrSkirt · 31/03/2025 22:31

Ponyfootymama · 31/03/2025 22:20

Great thread
We bought a beautiful Victorian mahogany wind out dining table when we had a big dining room (and would have been all for the fabulous cutlery to go with it…actually found a gorgeous monogrammed set at auction and bought that for about £120 I think).
Table cost about £1750. Didn’t regret it at all. Moved house and said table wouldn’t go through any door…lived wrapped in several layers of duvet in a shed on the yard for the next 6 years, before selling it last month for a huge £150. No one seems to want dining tables anymore, no matter how beautiful!
Live for the moment I say, buy the shoes, the car, the horse, the table, whatever makes your heart sing😍

We got our beautiful dining table from my SIL because it wouldn't fit into her new house. She has since moved again and I think it would fit but she's not getting it back!

I just googled it for the first time as this made me curious about the cost and the most similar one I can find is nearly €3000

Ponyfootymama · 31/03/2025 22:45

DressOrSkirt · 31/03/2025 22:31

We got our beautiful dining table from my SIL because it wouldn't fit into her new house. She has since moved again and I think it would fit but she's not getting it back!

I just googled it for the first time as this made me curious about the cost and the most similar one I can find is nearly €3000

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You hang on to your table lol! It was a wrench letting mine go but it was never going to fit through the doorway, I finally accepted it! Hope the lucky new owner is enjoying it, felt like I’d sold a member of the family😂

Clafoutie · 31/03/2025 22:51

I went through a phase ( thankfully over) of buying expensive perfumes, only to hate pretty much every one of them once I got home and put them in a cupboard where they remain, festering no doubt. I feel quite ill when I add up and consider the waste.

LunaNorth · 31/03/2025 22:54

Clafoutie · 31/03/2025 22:51

I went through a phase ( thankfully over) of buying expensive perfumes, only to hate pretty much every one of them once I got home and put them in a cupboard where they remain, festering no doubt. I feel quite ill when I add up and consider the waste.

Same. I stick to one now, and have a huge collection 😳

I’ve been through a really rough few years and would like to buy myself a ring to symbolise my strength and how hard I’ve worked at righting my ship. This thread isn’t bloody helping 😂

MidnightMeltdown · 31/03/2025 22:54

Toddlerteaplease · 30/03/2025 22:46

I brought a pillow that cost £80. I slept on it for three nights. Then put it back in the original packaging and returned it. It was ok. But I couldn’t justify the expense for something that was nothing special.

I bought an expensive dunlopillo that I decided I didn’t like. Unbeknownst to dp, it’s now on his side of the bed. I don’t think that he’s even noticed.

Clafoutie · 31/03/2025 23:00

LunaNorth · 31/03/2025 22:54

Same. I stick to one now, and have a huge collection 😳

I’ve been through a really rough few years and would like to buy myself a ring to symbolise my strength and how hard I’ve worked at righting my ship. This thread isn’t bloody helping 😂

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I think you should buy the ring!

re perfumes, yes, what is that trickery that makes you decide in the shop you have stumbled upon the very definition of yourself in a scent bottle, only to be scrubbing it off 4 hours later?! 😬

BobbySox71 · 31/03/2025 23:06

Ponyfootymama · 31/03/2025 22:20

Great thread
We bought a beautiful Victorian mahogany wind out dining table when we had a big dining room (and would have been all for the fabulous cutlery to go with it…actually found a gorgeous monogrammed set at auction and bought that for about £120 I think).
Table cost about £1750. Didn’t regret it at all. Moved house and said table wouldn’t go through any door…lived wrapped in several layers of duvet in a shed on the yard for the next 6 years, before selling it last month for a huge £150. No one seems to want dining tables anymore, no matter how beautiful!
Live for the moment I say, buy the shoes, the car, the horse, the table, whatever makes your heart sing😍

I agree, sometimes we just have to treat ourselves.
My horse is my sanity, I was a key worker during Covid and he kept me going 🥰

Violetmarmalade · 31/03/2025 23:58

FagsMagsandBags · 31/03/2025 01:54

This is so outrageous and so wonderful! I love dolls houses and miniatures, is there a chance we could see some photos? Along with the exhibition I now want to go to, I'm going to see if there are places where I might be able to have the tiniest of interactions with a dolls house or two. I'm finding things to do at the moment that bring me happiness and while the good thing is that I'm finding happiness in small things and my list is short, it's great to be reminded - and this thread has done that - of things that squeeze my heart because there's a beauty about them that goes beyond explanation. So now I have 10th April feeding capybaras, hopefully not too long after feeding sloths although that's reliant upon me begging to be let in early because there are no free places until September and I will almost certainly need to do it a while before then. Something, something wedding dress shopping, dolls house exhibitions and more miniatures.

There was a miniature 18th century silver teapot on a repeat of Antiques Roadshow (from Swanage) this evening. Made by the best silversmith of his or many eras and a man who didn't make miniatures/toys. It was so simple and perfect and I think £8-12k. The expert didn't want to let it go and I totally understood. It was so tactile. I love seeing what turns up on AR each week.

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If you live anywhere near the south of England I thoroughly recommend a visit to the incredible miniature world of dolls houses, shops and country scenes at Leonardslee House near Horsham, West Sussex, complete with moving parts like lifts in the department store. I can spend hours in there marvelling at the amazing detail https://www.leonardsleegardens.co.uk/dolls-house-museum

Dolls' House Museum | Leonardslee Gardens

The Dolls’ House Museum, created by Helen Holland depicts a magical world in miniature - brilliant craftsmanship and exquisite detail incarnate.

https://www.leonardsleegardens.co.uk/dolls-house-museum

DressOrSkirt · 01/04/2025 00:13

Ponyfootymama · 31/03/2025 22:45

You hang on to your table lol! It was a wrench letting mine go but it was never going to fit through the doorway, I finally accepted it! Hope the lucky new owner is enjoying it, felt like I’d sold a member of the family😂

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Yes, at least she can visit hers I suppose!

AnnoyedAsAllHeck · 01/04/2025 00:17

I have wasted money on stuff I know I'll never use, so spending money on a pair of shoes you know you'll enjoy is not wasteful.

If the person with the expensive cutlery set has used it and loved it and will use it for life, then it was worth it. To me, no difference in that or buying a BMW, Porshe, or a Bentley when cheaper is available.

AnnoyedAsAllHeck · 01/04/2025 00:21

Clafoutie · 31/03/2025 22:51

I went through a phase ( thankfully over) of buying expensive perfumes, only to hate pretty much every one of them once I got home and put them in a cupboard where they remain, festering no doubt. I feel quite ill when I add up and consider the waste.

I was out of that phase for a bit but dipped my toe back in last year. 90% of the ones I have, I either don't like or just don't need.
Of course, getting over Covid now and have no sense of smell and very little sense of taste. I am hoping both will return soon, or I'll be up shit creek without a paddle!

Itisfreezing111 · 01/04/2025 00:29

A large wool rug for my lounge, over £3000. 10 years old now and still gives me pleasure

FagsMagsandBags · 01/04/2025 00:39

Thank you for that, @Violetmarmalade I can definitely get there and I'll almost certainly be doing just that very soon!

Pollymollydolly · 01/04/2025 00:40

edwinbear · 30/03/2025 20:58

We couldn’t afford the canteen as well! They are individually wrapped up in tissue and kept in the (free) velvet roll we got with them.

OP - can we see your lovely shoes! 🙏

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That is gorgeous!

TryingToControlMyFinances · 01/04/2025 01:04

babyproblems · 30/03/2025 22:52

Thinking about my spending actually my other huge frivolity is a very small elderly dog who had significant health problems that I adopted at the age of 15… he’s one of the loves of my life and I take excellent care of him; everyone thought he would come home to die basically he was in such a poor state.. We are now several years on from his adoption and he is very much still going, stable and enjoying himself a little bit in life - I have spent thousands on his vets bills this last two years- we can afford it so it’s not a daft expense and of course makes a huge difference to him. My DH hasn’t ever asked me how much he actually costs us because he knows it’s a ridiculous amount 😂 Everyone constantly tells me I’m insane for adopting him and continuing any expensive treatment required at his age but honestly this tiny ancient dog is the most resilient thing I’ve ever seen, and he still has a good quality of life thanks to my investments in him both money at the vets & daily care. And he has taught me so much about unconditional love! For me it’s very worth it. I won’t keep him going when I know it’s his time and he can’t go on. Keep the shoes. Love this thread x

This is one of the nicest things I have ever read on Mumsnet.

Thank you for looking after this elderly dog so well.

In a world where everyone seems out just for themselves this was wonderful to read.

AlwaysPerplexed · 01/04/2025 02:19

I know this is really small in the grand scheme of things but I spent £20 on a potato peeler - Alessi (just checked it's now £35!) but I just love using it - In fact I have the bird kettle, a fruit bowl, a plate, all Alessi and all used every day.

talk to me if you stupidly bought something £££ you couldnt really afford

FagsMagsandBags · 01/04/2025 03:03

I'm here to bring a sloth update. Handily, @Violetmarmalade quoted one of my posts from yesterday so it's pretty close to this one making it slightly less "who are you, what are you talking about with sloths, woman?!" than it otherwise would have been.

So, big birthday next Monday (60th) and difficult times. I'd seen that you can get to feed capybara not too far from me and then discovered the sloth feeding too which, seriously, I love them so much they make me want to cry with their beautiful slow faces. Friend arranged a capybara feeding for me for 10th April but there were no dates free for sloths before September which doesn't surprise me. I get a message from her today - she's currently in Spain for a short break and still thinking of me - she's somehow managed to get me the sloth experience on my actual birthday, so 7th - and I will probably be weeping while feeding the most precious animals I can think of. I cannot put into words how happy this is making me. I'm in danger of getting over giddy so having to find ways to calm myself down before I lose myself in the excitement! I'm thinking I'll dolls house rabbit hole and look at pretty things that I'll be doing post next week and my south American animals. I'm not spending money on the feeding experiences but I would if I could/had to/something something, but I am lucky to have some of the best friends you could hope for who are helping me get to do some fun things I otherwise wouldn't be doing around about now. This thread, I don't know, it feels special and sharing this with all of you makes me happy.

There will be photos that I'll happily share if anyone wants to see a grown arsed woman crying next to a bemused sloth! 😅