Good salary- no money - struggling to afford everything!

[Boxingshibes]

This is mainly a vent- so please be gentle
I work ft in a full on role.
I have to travel for work at short notice so would find it difficult to get a 2nd job.
I make £62k which sounds loads
But this is to support 4 people. Myself
Dh is disabled and unable to work.
2 teenagers. Dd1 is looking for any work but not found anything.
Dd2 is autistic and agoraphobic.
We also have 2 dogs and 2 cats.
We rent in the SE. Our rent is going up by £100 to £1800 next month.
Next years council tax is almost £3k.
Gas and electricity is about £250
Food is about £150 a week.
Everything just keeps going up.

We may have to pay for dd1s college next year then there will be uni which we can't afford.

Dh will progressively get worse. Dd2 will possibly not be able to leave home. My df is in and out of hospital at the moment and dm is showing signs of dementia.

I just want to run away.

I would suggest DD gets an Apprenticeship rather than Uni. Or at most dues it from home. Supports herself with a part time job. Tuition paid for on Student Finance.
Is your DH claiming any benefits that he is entitled to?
How old is DD2?

Oof, this sounds tough. I'm assuming you've applied for ALL the benefits? Are you/DH getting any?

Are you getting all benefits and relief possible for DH and DD2?

Are you claiming everything you are entitled to ? Do your DP and DS get PIP etc ?

Also - your gas bill - is that £250 a month ?! I’ve just had my winter quarter gas bill and it was £180.

She's applying for jobs atm but no luck so far.
Dd2 is 16 but in y10
Dh gets pip which really helps

What about your Dd ? If you are thinking she may never leave home then he really ought to be getting it too ?

I didn't want to read and run. I've voted YANBU! I'm in a similar position. On paper, high wage, but with everything going up it means fuck all.. There must be people who call utilities etc and just say I can't pay what you're asking.

I don't know if dd2 is eligible for any. I'm currently paying for online school as they can't go to school.and the local education department doesn't seem to care.

Some councils give council tax relief if someone in the household gets PIP.
Every little helps.
Also what @Orangemintcream asked about your energy bills. I'm quite a profligate heating user, so I see it could be this much, but is anything eating gas that could be changed?

There might be hardship grants for people with DH's condition. It's possible to search & apply for these yourself, but more efficient via Citizen's Advice or the charity for his situation.

You need to apply. If his autism is such he may never live independently that’s exactly what it’s supposed to be for. To support him.

Then claim DLA for her.

You can claim DLA for DD2 if affected enough. Is DD1 on UC as she is job hunting? Have you used a benefit calculator to see if DH can claim UC Limited Capability for Work component? Have you looked into council tax deductions or discretionary payments?
It is also worth looking at your subscriptions and see if you're paying for stuff you aren't using, like TV add ons, can you get a cheaper, sim only phone contract etc.

Sorry kept putting his or Ds when it’s your Dd.

If she can’t go to school then PIP would at least partially cover her schooling costs.

I don’t know if you would get carers allowance or if you earn too much ?

Claim DLA for the agoraphobic child (or pip if they're over 16)
Put in a claim for universal credit and ask that your partner be assessed for LCWRA
Households like yours with high rent and lots of people living with disabilities can be entitled to universal credit on surprisingly high incomes (assuming you're not sitting on savings over 16k)
I ran an example calculation using the details you put in your op and came up with over £1000 UC entitlement. That's just an estimate because you'd not put enough information in your op to do a full check, but it shows it's well worth you taking 10 minutes to check properly for yourself. You can use one of the benefit calculators on the gov.uk website (that high amount assumes that your husband gets LCWRA and your child gets pip)

I earn too much for carer's allowance.
Same with college grants or anything else.
If we split my salary in 2 it would be £31k each and we'd be able to get more help. It's just because I'm the only earner we don't seem to be able to get any.
Dd2 i don't think will get PIP as they are fine at home but have panic attacks and are non verbal outside. Our GP is good but can't do home visits.
We all need dental work but I can't afford it and there are no nhs dentists. Dd2 is apparently on the waiting list for dental treatment at the hospital but has been for 18 months.
I just need to make more money.

just wanted to send you hugs. Pls take care of yourself. When I feel stressed about money, a good warm shower always helped.

UC is a means tested benefit. Even if op's dh could claim LCWRA then they are still not going to get any UC with a 62k income !

If your dd gets panic attacks and is non verbal outside the home it's very likely she will be entitled to pip.
Talk to your local citizens advice for help putting in a claim

With two disabled family members and high rent it's perfectly possible to get UC on a high income

Apologies I forgot abut the rent. I still think unlikely.

Moneysavingexpert.com- has a money makeover which takes you through your finances with a fine tooth comb. Can you look at alternative options for renting.

@Miley23 you would be surprised. With caring element £198 (not the means terse £83 a week, this is part of Uc claim) £1800 rent, two children, lcwra element it is possible like pp commented.

Apologies, I see a few other posters commented the same thing at the same time!

Sorry having such a hard time

def worth trying to claim uc as have high rent and 3 others in your household with higher needs

Unfortunately moving isn't an option. We wouldn't be able to save up deposit and 1st month's rent. We need 4 beds. I need an office for when I wfh. And we have pets.
We were both working when we moved here 3 years ago and I probably wouldn't pass the affordability checks. My credit rating is not good.