Good salary- no money - struggling to afford everything!

[Boxingshibes]

This is mainly a vent- so please be gentle
I work ft in a full on role.
I have to travel for work at short notice so would find it difficult to get a 2nd job.
I make £62k which sounds loads
But this is to support 4 people. Myself
Dh is disabled and unable to work.
2 teenagers. Dd1 is looking for any work but not found anything.
Dd2 is autistic and agoraphobic.
We also have 2 dogs and 2 cats.
We rent in the SE. Our rent is going up by £100 to £1800 next month.
Next years council tax is almost £3k.
Gas and electricity is about £250
Food is about £150 a week.
Everything just keeps going up.

We may have to pay for dd1s college next year then there will be uni which we can't afford.

Dh will progressively get worse. Dd2 will possibly not be able to leave home. My df is in and out of hospital at the moment and dm is showing signs of dementia.

I just want to run away.

No, he can't claim UC because of OP's income. UC is means tested and it's calculated on household income, not individual income.

Why are people suggesting OP rehomes members of her family? How absolutely disgusting. Pets aren't a commodity you can just chuck away. Vile.

Our electricity bill is £230 a month, tiny 2 bed bungalow. We aren't doing anything that any other normal family don't do.

HTH.

Is your council tax really almost $3k?!
That is extortionate.
Sorry no other practical advice that has not already been said. What a mess the UK is in.

@WalkingonWheels are you not eligible for New Style ESA? DH’s income doesn’t prevent you from claiming that.

OP’s household may well be eligible for UC despite OP’s earnings.

Make sure you are claiming the Child Benefit, if not already.
Local councils also have benefits advisers.
Also what about a small sofa bed chair, or a chair recliner for your DH’s nap.
Because the fourth bedroom is adding to rent and council tax band etc.

Doesn't she get DLA?

Have you checked your disabled DH's eligibility for PIP, your autistic DC for DLA and signed your family onto the Local Housing Register?

Living in the SE is brutal and has been for decades; if you're not a high earner or in a two-income above average earning household you're toast without some form of additional help.

Have you tried entitled to? I think a joint income of £65000 might get you a very small amount of UC, but it might act as a gateway for other things?

It sounds like you work very hard in a tough set of circumstances especially if DH has a progressive illness. Hopefully you’ve found some helpful advice on here x

OP’s DC2 is 16 so it would be PIP DD or an appointee applied for, not DLA.

£230 a month- wow you must like it tropical, and have a funny idea about what normal is, we have a 2 bedroom house our power bill is under £100.
Pets are better off in homes that can afford them, you really need a reality check if you think having pets is more important than a home breaking apart because of too many commitments and not enough income, or time.
It's tough, but when you are drowning radical change isn't a choice it's a necessity.

Some of the comments on here are actually really awful. Are people living on planet Mars? We have a housing crisis. It's not that easy to just buy a place....

OP you really need to tackle the schools thing and be a bit more firm with the local authority that could save you some money

I don’t think £62k is loads or a high wage. We are conditioned to think this way, but you lose so much in tax, while billionaires live tax free. Things need to change at a political level as they cannot continue as they are. How are you supposed to support a family of 4 on that income with rent so high? It’s incredibly unfair and I’m very sorry you’re struggling.

But moving somewhere cheaper will save you hundreds over course of a year

Assuming DD2 is under the age of 16, then she could well be eligible for Disability Living Allowance. Definitely worth applying.

It's DLA if DD2 is under 16. OP would definitely not be entitled to claim Carers Allowance as she earns too much.

It's DLA if the claimant is under 16.

Did your DH not claim New Style ESA when he became too disabled to work? If not, it might be worth doing a benefit calculator to see if he can claim it now. It's based on the NI contributions made in the last two or three years and isn't means-tested. Depending on what group he gets put in, he could keep claiming it indefinitely.

Have you applied to have part of hubbies tax allowance from HMRC

OP, you sound as though you’re drowning with so many people to take care of who are relying on you 💐. While your salary sounds good on paper, it’s not enough to support four people, especially as your children are essentially adults (so eat adult portions of food, need adult-sized clothes and shoes etc.).

Others have given good advice about the various benefits you may be able to claim. I know DH is ill but can he take on the responsibility of looking into all these suggestions, making claims etc.? It sounds as though you are doing everything for everyone and adding benefits research / EHCP applications to your pile will be overwhelming. Also, DD1 needs to get a job - any job. Working in a supermarket, bar, shop, call centre etc. even if that’s not her ideal career. She must be 17/18 if DD2 is 16 and needs to contribute.

Ours was that last year.

£27k to support 3 of us one of whom is a twenty year old autistic whom most days I cannot get out of the house.

Its fun isn’t it?

I agree with this.

I am sorry your DH is ill and can't work at all.

But looking at other posts you have, and your own admission that you have a bad credit record, it's coming over as if you could budget better.

As others have said, your bills are on the high side- the heating for a start, (you're living somewhere that is generally mild not freezing cold) food (although it's not hugely so) and you have pets.

What struck me though was that your DD (finishing her A levels?) can't get work. From where you've said your location is, it's hard to believe she can't find weekend work in hospitality, or even work like babysitting/ pet care/ for neighbours.

Then there's her expectation that you will pay for a trip to the other end of country because she wants to see some museums- a trip of almost 400 miles plus accommodation.

Seriously? Why are you even considering paying for that? Does she not know you're finding it hard?

My parents paid for nothing for me as a teen because they couldn't.
From 16 I had Saturday jobs , paid for my own clothes (bar school uniform), my social life etc.

You say your DH gets PIP- so how much is that a month? What does that take your £62Kpa up to? Some people get hundreds of pounds a month on PIP.

You've not said what the total family income is annually including benefits.

If you've not done it already, can you take a really careful look at all your outgoings?

Mobiles- any cheaper offers?
TV- are you paying subs for Netflix etc?
Utilities- have you searched for a cheaper deal and tried Switch?

How old is the elder DD?

She wants to go on a pub crawl in Scotland in the summer yet she isn't working and presumably under 18. And what takes the biscuit is you're expected to pay for it all including getting there and the hotels.

I think she needs a taste of reality if you're really struggling to pay for day to day expenses.

@BooneyBeautiful if you read OP’s posts, DC2 is 16, so it is PIP.

Uni is a waste of money. A good apprenticeship is much better.
Unless it's a science/engineering type of degree.

Regarding dd2 education. If she is deemed to be medically unfit for school then the local authority must provide an education for her (Section 19) Contact your local authority and ask who deals with this provision (sometimes the Fair Access team, sometimes admissions) the local authority can be fined for not providing this and you need to challenge the off rolling (which in turn would save you money on online school etc)