Do you remind your partner about their own mother on mother's day?

[Laiste]

Or do you just leave them to it?

Do you actually buy the card for him?

Do you feel he should do more but you don't get involved?

Just interested 😊 In our case i remind him, but leave him to it AND think he should do more ...

Not at all. I don't need him to remind me about it so no idea why I should remind him.

No, I do not. He'd a grown adult with a responsible job and as much awareness of the world as me, he can manage to buy his mother a card.

I love my MIL too, but she's not my mum! I have more then enough of my own jobs to do, I don't need his as well.

I can’t imagine feeling sexual attraction to a giant man baby who needed reminding of an annual event.

Nope! I don’t take responsibility for any cards or gifts for his side of the family. It’s never even come up and I’m not quite sure how anyone ends up being responsible for it or even feel like they should be giving reminders. 🤔

I don't deal with any presents or cards for the in-laws. As a result they don't get any or they get something last-minute and rushed from him. But it's not quite the same as the in-laws are from a different culture and are not big on celebrating birthdays, no Christmas etc.

tell him. After Mothers' Day tell him just how shit it is, as a mother, when your child makes zero effort.
And that it makes you not fancy him at all.

Why does the thread make you sad? Are you assuming that everyone that says they don’t reminder their partners/husbands results in the partners’/husbands’ family being forgotten?

I don’t remind mine, because he sorts it. It wouldn’t cross my mind to remind him because he isn’t a child. It’s not about making life easier it’s just that he is a grown adult and was able to remember and purchase these things before he met me, and is fully capable of continuing

I reminded him it was Mother’s Day this weekend a couple of weeks ago, because I had no idea and spotted it in the calendar and he was sat next to me. He’d have reminded me if he’d seen it first. I won’t do anything more than that, he’s just picked something up for his mum from IKEA and told her that can be her Mother’s Day present. I wouldn’t have reminded him or intervened if that hadn’t have happened, he’s a functioning adult.

Same!

I do, and if I'm the one in the shop and see something she would like I'll get it. He does many thoughtful things for me without being asked to. We're a team and it's not difficult while getting my own mum something at the same time.

I reminded him in the supermarket the other day as I was picking out a card for my mother but he’d already got one. Job done. I don’t remind my siblings because some bother, some don’t, and me reminding them won’t make any difference. I’ll still get it in the ear from mum about them not sending anything. It’s always the good children that end up punished!

I can honestly say he doesn't need reminding and always remembers.

I always buy my MIL flowers and a card.
My own mum sadly died many years ago.
I couldn't imagine MIL not receiving something. Should DH do it, yes and he probably would, but I will hopefully be a MIL one day and I hope I'm given consideration like my DSs partners mum do.

I’m afraid this year I’ve ordered the flowers for MIL, bought the cards from both DH and the DC and reminded him to write and post them 😬

All I can say in my defence is that we each have strengths and weaknesses and he makes up for my failings in other areas!

I do the card and present for my MIL. She is really thoughtful towards buying gifts for everyone that I couldn’t imagine not getting her something. I know she is upset that one of her other sons, doesn’t even send her a birthday card, let alone a Mother’s Day card which I think is really out of order.

I do it on behalf of my DH because he allows me to work part time so naturally I do more of the home stuff. As a pp said, we work as a team to our strengths.

I guess I don’t really mind doing it. Maybe if I didn’t like her I wouldn’t bother.

My boyfriend gets his mum a card and gift by himself, but if he didn’t, I wouldn’t be reminding him. I just wouldn’t see that as my problem/job.

He takes care of his own mother.

the only gift giving I handle for him is our nieces and nephews on that side. I enjoy it and he loathes the process so I am happy to trade him for a chore I dislike.

No, for 2 reasons - that side of the family don't do mothers day (fathers day and don't even send him a birthday card) and as they don't even acknowledge my existence (after 40 years of marriage) I don't waste energy thinking about them. I lost my Mum a few years ago so don't think about mothers day, it's not important to me anymore, but it was lovely to receive a gift from one of my children yesterday for Sunday and I've been invited out on Sunday by another. I feel lucky.

We see our mums together (they are friends) so I have bought both of them the same things. He does a lot more practical running around for our mums than I do - lifts, DIY, gardening etc - and I like shopping for lovely gifts, so it’s just sticking to our strengths really.

I really love my MIL though, might feel differently if I didn’t.

Not necessarily remind him but there would probably be some discussion about what I'm getting for my mum and I might ask him what he's getting for his.

He's more likely to remind me than the other way around because I don't ever do anything - my mum recoils from anything that draws attention to her age (including anything reminding her she's a mother and grandmother) so I am off the hook for birthdays, mother's day, etc.

See also: cards, gifts generally, creating christmas magic... none of which are really a thing in my family!

No i am not his mother

No I don’t need to remind him. He ordered a delivery of flowers without prompting.

I bought the card but only because I was going shopping anyway and asked him if he’d bought one yet and should I get one.

I don’t have a mum and I’m more than happy to share in celebrating his lovely mum too.

I remind him once then leave it. Same for his mum and sisters birthdays.
DH works two jobs, so he's often out from 8am until midnight 6 days a week. He has a lot to juggle work wise, so a little reminder about (his) family stuff is no skin off my nose. I'm thankful he works so hard for us.

Yep, this