AIBU to think DH should stop taking discounted food out of peoples trolleys.

[ByWarmViewer]

This happens every time we're in Tescos on a Sunday and they put the discounted stuff from the bakery out. Lots of customers surround the racks and DH just waits outside pushing each other over the goods and DH just waits a couple metres away then takes the goods out of peoples trolleys and shouts at people if they try taking it back.

AIBU to think he is completely in the wrong here, even if he other customers are pushing each other? I don't even know why he does it when we're not exactly short of money.

This. We’re on over £100k between us and I never buy the discounted goods because others need them more. I would hit the roof if my DH did this.

I really, really NEED to know why you, @ByWarmViewer, think this is OK?

Of course he's not on £100k per year

Why would someone on £100k take discounted food out of a strangers shopping trolley?

I have been on the bones of my arse, needing to buy a cheaply as possible, and still I never took food out of other people's trolleys.

Exactly. Nearly trying to condone his behaviour because “he’s kind”. If this is real then I don’t know what sort of reaction you thought you’d get. I doubt for a second he’d pull that crap with someone like my DH who’s skin headed and built like a brick shit house. I’d say he’s a mysoginistic bully who probably gets his rocks off stealing food from women’s trolleys and shouting at them if they respond

if that’s what you’ve settled to share your liife with your standards are in the gutter and you’re more to be pitied that you have to go on MN to see if it’s ok

This happened to me but at Christmas.

I got the very last packet of scotch pancakes and some fucker took them out of my trolley when I wasn't looking.

I was fuming because they were for my ARFID daughter and one of the few things she will eat.

I would not go food shopping with him.
Why waste a Sunday going to Tescos?

I suggest you don’t go near a supermarket near closing time or do an on line shop instead.His behaviour is not normal I would be extremely worried he is mentally ill.He seems to be enjoying a power trip,what does he take out of interest?

I am naive enough to now believe you. So. This is far bigger that this incident. His upbringing has led him to be carrying such bitterness that he needs to ‘win’ all the time, and will result in him never being happy. A happy person with his income would be doing the opposite to what he is, ie buying and putting in the food bank bins.
He has only one chance at getting some happiness and it’s via extensive counselling.
If he can’t accept this/engage, I’d leave if I were you op.

He actually takes things out of people's trolleys that they have already selected? This is extremely weird behaviour, how can you be disappointed in the replies. Its awful behaviour from him.

I didn’t believe this from the first post, but the he’s on ‘100k’ post cements it. Of course he is 🙄 because that would really rile people up wouldn’t it?

Although, after reading posts on here, the level of weirdness some people exhibit along with the depressingly low bar some women have for men, I guess it could be true.

Disappointed because we said his behaviour is unkind and not normal or disappointed that you didn't realise how badly he is behaving?

His childhood has no bearing on him being a nasty, unkind person. Once we reach adulthood we have a responsibility to ourselves and to society to stop lashing out at others and actually grow up and become a decent human being. Stop trying to minimise and excuse appalling behaviour OP.

Ok so he is indeed deeply traumatised from surviving an extremely distressing childhood.

He needs therapy, urgently. His behaviour is understandable in this context but absolutely unacceptable, antisocial and horrible given that the people whose trolleys he is raiding could be trying to survive on less than a quarter of what he has. He needs therapy to learn how to deal with his trauma without feeling the need to compete for discounted food as if he was still in poverty.

My nephew would go to supermarkets just before closing time and try to grab as much of the reduced food as possible. He would then give it to the homeless who NEEDED it. He was on benefits so couldn’t afford much, and before people wade in, he had cancer and couldn’t work because of his treatment. So OP, I hope your husband is proud of himself for denying the needy just so he , and you, can have a laugh.

If your husband earns £100k, perhaps he should spend some of it on therapy to work out why he behaves like that. He’s a bully and not a nice person. It’s even more spiteful given how much he earns.

And frankly, you’re not particularly nice for enabling this behaviour every week.

Well IF this is true (........) then I suggest he invest some of his wealth in Therapy for you both. You need it.

You won't find any Self Respect, Dignity or Morals in the reduced section.

You’re making excuses for him? If this is real, don’t be surprised if his cunt-ish behaviour is directed at you at some point too.

To be clear:it’s not a “quirk”. It’s really really weird, rude & bizarre as well as unnecessary.
it’s also not “not great” x it is downright offputting, outrageous and stupid behaviour.
He may be otherwise “a nice husband” but that stuff is a MASSIVE dick move & I’d be telling him to stop it.

Also not a “social norm” to not take stuff out of other people’s trolleys. It is a dick move and I’d be appalled & really fucking angry if my “DH” behaved like that.

I would hit him with a baguette

Who puts their hand into somebody else's trolley! This is divorce worthy.
I hope he gets banned from the shop

There's absolutely no way I would be going shopping with someone who did that. Start ordering shopping online or send him on his own.

Is this a serious post? If so you both need help! Ridiculous

£100k and he's stealing reduced items from other (undoubtedly less well off) people, he needs to give his head a wobble. What a dickhead.