Cafe humiliation

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Took my DD (hardworking mum to my 2 DGC) for lunch in a very nice local cafe (pink tea pots, fresh roses on the tables) as a treat.
Lunch menu looked nice. We ordered and I asked if I could just check if my salad could be gluten free. At this the waitress asked if I was choosing or actually coeliac. I am in fact, coeliac and she said then informed me that I would need to sign something first. Honestly, I thought it was a joke but she came back with a large clipboard and an A4 sheet of paper and pen and asked me to have it signed by the time she returned; she was not going to take the order until this was done.
I sat staring at the paperwork wondering of this was for real. The paperwork was a disclaimer that if the cafe should inadvertantly slip me anything gluten laden then they would keep this piece of paper with my "consent" at the risks therein.
Several ladies having tea and lunches were staring at me and DD when the waitress came back; she was astonished that I hadn't signed their form yet. I just wanted to have a nice salad lunch with my daughter to treat her without having some jobsworth make me out to be some sort of liability to them. DD said it had sucked the good vibe right out and she was absolutely right.
So the waitress then asked why I wouldn't sign. I had to explain (calmly but upset) that I had hoped for kinder and far more inclusive customer service instead of singling me out and making me "other" whilst their diners looked on wondering why I was having to sign their paperwork before anyone was willing to serve us. She said, no, it's not like that - but I had to explain again that their paperwork was not to caring for the customer it was them covering their back against me if they were to make a mistake. Although I previously liked the cafe very much, DD and I left.
I'm a woman of the world and a solo traveller too. I have a happy go lucky nature but today...I really felt humiliated. AIBU?

I honestly don’t blame cafes and restaurants for doing this. Better to avoid paying out potentially thousands of pounds in compensation, when the alternative is just upsetting a few over sensitive people by asking them to sign a form. So many people these days go for compensation for everything.

Weird they made you sign this when they could probably just have a disclaimer on the menu that they cannot guarantee gluten free

Your crime? Daring to have dietary needs. Their response? A public inquisition, a demand for your signature, as if your very presence was an impending lawsuit waiting to happen

I’m sure you signing a disclaimer would mean diddly squat if something bad happened to you. They still have a duty of care no matter what.

Genuine question, how do you expect to eat safe food if you resent having to divulge that information when you have an allergy?
I get that it's not particularly enjoyable to do, and tiresome, but what other way round it is there? It's not being done to make you humiliated or so people can laugh at you, it's being done so you can eat, eat safely and not become ill.

If someone else is preparing your food, then they need to know if something potentially in that dish would be a problem for you, so they can leave or swap that out or advise that's not possible.

It seems like you can't win where allergies are concerned, if you don't take them seriously you're irresponsible and if you do, and ask for and give relevant information to that end, you're humiliating people.

What's the answer here? How do you cater for allergies safely without asking for and providing that information, but also without someone feeling they're being humiliated because there's a conversation about it?

Literally just say to them ' the dish doesn't contain any gluten but we can't totally guarantee no cross contamination'. And don't bring out faux legal paperwork which has probably been written by some semi-literate cafe manager.

You're being incredibly unfair OP. It is nothing like the cafe promising they won't give you food poisoning. General food hygiene is controlled in a similar way across all restaurants and all staff will be trained as such. In order to guarantee your food is gluten free there must be separate storage, chopping board, utensils, cooking oil, etc and for people with really severe coeliac disease actually a completely separate environment so there's no gluten in the air/environment at all. So a cafe can give you gluten free bread in your sandwich but that sandwich is still not guaranteed gluten free. They're not out to get you

If it arises in future I'm pretty sure the Unfair Contract Terms Act 1977 is still good law. The Act prevents exclusion or restriction of liability for death or personal injury resulting from negligence, regardless of whether the contract is with a consumer or a business. So they wouldn't be liable if any contamination was non-negligent (e.g. if there was an issue at the manufacturer causing gluten contamination in a condiment they were using, and they couldn't reasonably have been aware of this) but if they were negligent i.e. not taking reasonable care, they would still be liable whether or not you signed a disclaimer

but all your other examples are negative things that can have significant impacts on someone's life.

eating/feeding in a toilet is unpleasant and unhygienic
being stopped from going on a trip means social exclusion and missing out on a valuable experience
not being allowed to apply for a job will have a financial impact

How does signing a form have any negative impact on someone? People sign forms every day and aren't shamed or mocked for it.

I can't believe you are comparing signing a piece of paper in relation to an intolerance to gluten to institutional racism.

See I went roller skating and was asked to sign a waiver as well.

Business need to start accepting risks as being their own.

Just because you can’t avoid cross contamination doesn’t mean it’s a “shit kitchen with shit staff” if there is gluten anywhere in the kitchen there is no guarantee it will be completely gluten free, unless the area used is completely separate, the staff change their uniform and the utensils and so on are thoroughly washed between use

Did they get vegetarian food correct? As I have had some grotesque veggie food at weddings. Fish - but vegetarians eat fish? Vegan- what's your problem - vegetarian vegan no difference. Etc,Etc.

Only if you have allergies and not intolerances

I agree.

If I owned a business, this is exactly the stance I would take to be honest.
I'd refuse customers with allergies rather than risk being sued.

So humiliation towards anyone else like 'semi literate cafe owners' is fine then.

Do you want allergies taken seriously or not?

Your point was that it's humiliating to have to divulge sensitive and personal information in a restaurant, and my question was how do you avoid that happening but still enable people with allergies to eat, and do so safely.

You seem to have a chip on your shoulder - hope it's been cooked in a gf fryer!

What an appetite killer

People need to take allergies seriously

My grandchild is coeliac. Cannot have even a grain of gluten. It’s a disease that can potentially cause so many long term problems!! I quiz every cafe / restaurant before we eat.

But these disclaimers are not legally enforceable, so it doesn't prevent them from having to pay compensation if they cross-contaminate allergens which then causes an allergic reaction to someone who had identified their allergy to them.

This is negligence.

You clearly do not have food safety knowledge, along with quite a lot of others on this thread. Hopefully the OP will report them to the authorities over their lack of allergen management competence.

If you owned a food business and weren't competent with preventing cross-contamination, then you'd be in breach of food safety legislation and shouldn't even be running a food business.

Leave it to the people who know what they're doing.

Don't blame the server. Clearly, she was doing as instructed. Like you, I would've left as well.
I'd be leaving a review about the cafe and reporting it to the FSA?

I haven't experienced this myself, OP, but I have heard of it, and also places simply refusing to serve people with serious intolerance or allergies.

It isn't nice for the diner, but tbh I don't blame them, I think it's become increasingly risky for them, and the businesses can't accommodate the costs of an error - and errors always happen eventually - or in some cases can't accommodate the expectations for ensuring no cross contamination in the kitchen because of the limitations of the kitchen itself. Or maybe in some cases the time involved becomes overwhelming - I think this has especially become the case as more and more people claim allergies and intolerances and special diets that they expect to be accommodated.

It's maybe the inevitable conclusion of safety culture.

I also don't think you're being unreasonable.

Cafes and restaurants cannot contract out of their duty of care. While they are legally required to draw customers' attention to allergen risks, they could do so just as easily with their menu or notices.

I don't think there's a single reported instance of an eatery successfully defending a claim on the basis of a waiver.

I'd be interested in seeing the outcome if someone who was refused service due to refusal to sign a waiver brought a claim under the Equality Act. I suspect that eateries insisting on these waivers are likely exposing themselves to risk more than they are reducing it.

If cafes are not confident in reliability providing safe gluten free food they should not advertise food as being gluten free.

I'm fine with a verbal disclaimer. I'm not fine with signing something. That says they have no confidence in their abilities to run a kitchen well.

I'd fully expect everyone eating to come down with food poisoning if waivers were necessary. I just wouldn't eat there.

If you'd like to enjoy your meal from the shit kitchen, have fun!