To not pay for an unwanted child?

[Anudawan]

Hypothetical.

it came up at work today.

if the pregnancy was a result of a one night stand, regardless of whether precautions were taken, if the man doesn’t want the pregnancy and the woman decides to continue, should he be able to opt out of child support?

my personal answer and I’m not sure on the nuance (ie do you have be on the birth certificate and thus can claim parental responsibility in order to be compelled to pay maintenance or a dna test to compel the man) my personal answer is no, he cannot or shouldn’t be able to opt out once the child is born. All sex (with a woman of reproductive age) carries the risk of pregnancy, you can lower the risk but never fully remove it. Abstinence is the only way to do that. To do the action you’ve got to be prepared for the consequences. It’s very easy to flippantly say ‘get an abortion’ but for some women that isn’t viable.

So no need to use them in case they break? What a lame excuse not to take responsibility! Never heard such a pathetic excuse as to why men shouldn't use a condom!

So what do you think women do when they have a child they do not want? They have to pay for them! Duh! Woman has a kid they do not want - they feed it, clothe it, house it etc so they pay for it. Not rocket science.

I never mentioned rape. I mentioned jizzing inside someone without consent. Rape is penetrating without consent. The two acts are different. Women do not have a penis to penetrate a man with. Not sure you understand what rape is.

Rape = penetrating without consent.
Jizzing = ejaculating.

You can jizz inside or outside a vagina. There is no reason why he cannot jizz outside. Is there?

So you think men should declare their fertility or be jailed as rapists? WTF?

It's quite perverse when you think about it....

Man lies about contraception = charged as a rapist and jailed for four years.

Woman lies about contraception = man pays for the unwanted child for 18 years and is stigmatised if he doesn't.

🤔

So you are saying all men are rapists who do not declare their fertility - never once met a man who has declared it and they all need to be locked up?

So why do you think men should have to declare fertility or be a rapist?

So you think causing physical harm to another adult is not an issue?

If she has lied then he has also lied then both are to blame - no?

If men want to be certain that they will not impregnate a woman, they should get vasectomies and use condoms. Or just be celibate.

There is a great book called “Ejaculate Responsibly” by Gabrielle Blair - men need to be more responsible about birth control instead of expecting women to handle it or deal with the consequences of unprotected sex.

So no need to use them in case they break? What a lame excuse not to take responsibility! Never heard such a pathetic excuse as to why men shouldn't use a condom!

If that's what you're saying then yes I agree it's a lame excuse - nobody else has said it. But condoms do break. So even though it's best to wear one you can still end up in a sticky situation, pardon the pun.

So what do you think women do when they have a child they do not want?

They usually put it up for adoption. However, the vast majority would already have had an abortion. It's extremely rare for women in this country to give birth to a child they don't want.

I never mentioned rape. I mentioned jizzing inside someone without consent. Rape is penetrating without consent. The two acts are different.

Legally, 'stealthing' is classified as rape. Read the article.

So you think men should declare their fertility or be jailed as rapists? WTF?

No, you made that bit up, lol.

You were the one using it as an excuse.

Nope women do not 'usually' put them up for adoption at all. Adoption isn't common when it comes to unwanted children. Most unplanned kids are not adopted. It is not extremely rare.

By all means share the data on that.

I wasn't on about stealthing! I explained that. You didn't understand that. I was on about jizzing without consent not penetrating without consent. The two are different. I did explain it. Sorry your comprehension doesn;'t know the what penetrating and ejaculating means and understand they are two different things.

Well you said that if women do not declare their fertility they should be jailed so doesn't that apply to men to?

If men want to be certain that they will not impregnate a woman, they should get vasectomies and use condoms. Or just be celibate.

If women want to be certain they won't be raising a child without financial input from the father they should consider whether he wants to be a father before choosing to have the baby against his will.

See, it's easy to make these statements.

If women want to avoid facing discrimination at work they should just avoid being mothers.

(That's about as sensible as suggesting that men who don't want kids should remain celibate. 😂)

They face it without being mothers! ha ha!

Imagine roles were reversed and men can trap women with babies. This comment section will differ for sure.

sex with a condom and sex without a condom are two different activities

stealthing, which some men do, is rape because sex without a condom is not what the woman consented to

not the same as sex both consent to in the manner both consent to but the woman lying about taking a pill

Men do trap women with babies in abusive relationships. All. The. Time.

My comments wouldn't differ: children are entitled to the financial support of both parents. It took both parents to create the child; both parents are responsible for the child should it be born.

Why would you want to put a child in a predicament like that. The father does NOT want them. And then you will go and rant about ahhh he cannot provide for his child but he’s with other women. Or he doesn’t come see he’s child but he’s with he’s other children. A child also needs a father and mother figure in order for a ‘happy home’. And women trap men. End of argument.

no, most women do not want anal sex as there is no pleasure from it, we do not have a prostrate

the orgasm gap is bloody wide enough to drive a truck through already, it doesn't need to get wider!

so because the poor wee menz can't get exactly what they want (ejaculating inside a vagina) even though they have alternatives that still involve intimacy with a woman (oral or hand stimulation, using a condom properly) they should get away scot free with irresponsibly ejaculating? causing unwanted pregnancies?

paying for offspring they created for 18 years (many of them don't pay, it's poorly enforced and many pay peanuts) vs the woman giving 18 years to actually, you know, raise the child

I don't think they're getting the worst end of the deal here

cry me a river

It literally says one night stand. Take that in. You’re drunk and you end up w this guy that you probably don’t even like but you want them to step up. Maybe you should be on a coil then. But these are the same women who argue that abortion should be allowed.

They can and do! Contraception coercion is a thing by many men.

Men are irresponsible and jizz without taking responsibility is the issue here and then say they were trapped to excuse it away.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/newsbeat-60646285

50% of women experienced coercion when it comes to contraception. Yet men do not do this you say?

Ohhhh plssss call the police it’s not by force. You will try anything to make it make sense.

Read what I said. It’s a one night stand situation. Not a whole relationship your going off topic.

You said about it is women doing the trapping of men. Nope if a man doesn't declare his fertility then he is doing the same as she is.

My link shows men are very much coercing women and forcing them - thus trapping them.

So what you are saying is all men who have a ONS declare they are fertile? Never in a month of Sundays do men declare their fertility when having a ONS.

Give over!

That’s a 1/1000 situation most possibly in a relationship. Refer to the question we are on about one night stands. Women use that to their advantage to entrap the male.

I absolutely agree that women should be responsible for their fertility and not have unprotected sex if they do not want to get pregnant.

I have never ever said otherwise.

the OP was a one night stand, regardless of whether precautions were taken, should men be able to opt out of child support for any resulting offspring

and my stance is no, they should not

because if they REALLY do not want to be on the hook for child support they can 100% avoid it by not ejaculating inside a vagina

so if the one night stand occurs and the DID NOT use any precautions, then they have to be responsible for the consequences of their actions

I find it really odd tbh that anything thinks it's okay for them to just... opt out and say nope

I say that to say this. I would hate to tell my child your dads not coming to see you or I don’t have money for these things because of the father who’s absent because they literally told me they don’t want my child.

50% means it is 50/100 which as an equivalent fraction is 1 in 2 situation. Not quite sure you understand percentages.

You mean men do not declare their fertility the same as the woman so they are both to blame yet you blame the woman?

So she doesn't declare she is fertile. Yet he doesn't have to and doesn't control his penis or what comes out of it and she is to blame? Yet they have both done the same?

Aye ok!

So men can say nothing and not tell the woman if he has had a vasectomy and not use a condom BBBBUUUUTTT she is 100% to blame. Isn't that him tricking her by pretending to be infertile?

Let’s say the male is the one carrying the child. They have more options than he women ie morning after pill, coil or abortion and many other contraceptive options yet the male still wants the women to contribute even though she said NO. Ok. Now even if she does contribute money what about being physically there for the child and providing the ‘happy home’ for the child, you cannot force that on them. Now why in the earth would you want that for your child. It doesn’t make sense. I say that to say this, pick the father wisely. I personally don’t believe in abortion but I know I wouldn’t find my self in that predicAment because I know I want the happy home and contribution and 100% provided by both figures. Why settle for 20% and have a miserable child.