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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Sell the story, if so to who?

316 replies

cupsandcupsoftea · 18/03/2025 20:15

I'm unsure about this but I'm on dating sites and as we all know it's full of parasites.

I was speaking to an elected councillor who I thought was decent, he sent me nudes, vulgar text etc. He swiftly deleted it but it's really wrong, I have screenshot etc. He was disgusting.

I'm not on about selling per se for money but we shouldn't have creeps like this representing us.

OP posts:
Original poster
cupsandcupsoftea · 18/03/2025 20:27

I thought it was a fake so I messaged but it wad him.

OP posts:
StillweriseLH · 18/03/2025 20:27

Yeah, I think this will backfire worse on you.

Original poster
cupsandcupsoftea · 18/03/2025 20:27

And yes councillors have their numbers online.

OP posts:
Haricots · 18/03/2025 20:28

What Did he do that was “a bit horrible” on the app that made you stalk his number (and no way did you get it off a gov website)

Kibble29 · 18/03/2025 20:28

Send him an email with a list of your demands. 😈

ToKittyornottoKitty · 18/03/2025 20:28

cupsandcupsoftea · 18/03/2025 20:27

And yes councillors have their numbers online.

So what are horrible messages? Was he threatening you?

Whoarethoseguys · 18/03/2025 20:29

cupsandcupsoftea · 18/03/2025 20:25

We chatted on the site, he then got a bit horrible. Then I thought I'd find his number on government site to verify was him, I assumed it wad a fake profile. It wasn't as he got back to me off the proper number

Councillors' details are not available on the Government site. Only MPs.
Do you mean the local authority site?

Haricots · 18/03/2025 20:29

cupsandcupsoftea · 18/03/2025 20:27

And yes councillors have their numbers online.

They do

I have just checked the list on my council website

not one single mobile number. All landlines or email

MyGardenHasGreatTits · 18/03/2025 20:29

It’s not ideal that you’ve received messages that you don’t like or want.

It’s also not ideal that you tried to ‘out’ his ‘impersonator’ by searching for his professional details.

Just let this one go OP. No-one is covered in glory here.

parietal · 18/03/2025 20:29

If you want to expose him, write to the local paper in the area. But don’t expect to get any money for it. Just do it for the good of the local community.

scoopoftheday · 18/03/2025 20:30

A local paper wouldn't publish this.

Original poster
cupsandcupsoftea · 18/03/2025 20:30

Yes, off Google just put his name and councillor it came up.

OP posts:
Original poster
cupsandcupsoftea · 18/03/2025 20:30

Okay, my original theory was he was using another person's photos hence the verification.

OP posts:
Whoarethoseguys · 18/03/2025 20:31

Haricots · 18/03/2025 20:29

They do

I have just checked the list on my council website

not one single mobile number. All landlines or email

Edited
Show quote history

They won't be their personal numbers though, just their office numbers

Original poster
cupsandcupsoftea · 18/03/2025 20:31

It was his mobile number.

OP posts:
MyGardenHasGreatTits · 18/03/2025 20:31

Ah, OP not engaging with anyone who says ‘you’re both a pair of idiots’ and only those whose questioning allows the OP to dig deeper on why and how she tried to expose him.

Original poster
cupsandcupsoftea · 18/03/2025 20:31

Hence I have it all on WhatsApp

OP posts:
Haricots · 18/03/2025 20:32

cupsandcupsoftea · 18/03/2025 20:30

Yes, off Google just put his name and councillor it came up.

His personal mobile number came up
sure op
moving on….

what was a “bit horrible” that made you decide to contact him and thereby give him your own mobile number? That doesn’t seem…a sensible response to someone being a “bit horrible” on an app OP, now does it?

OneWaryCat · 18/03/2025 20:32

What was horrible about the messages? If they were 'just' vulgar then sadly that is a lot of men on dating sites. What is vulgar to you might be a turn on to someone else. Sending unsolicited nudes is obviously gross, but unless this man is married, you were on a dating site and talking to each other for the purposes of romance. He's clearly misread the signals and might be a bit inappropriate, but is any of it really a crime? Or are you breaching his privacy because of his job?

Original poster
cupsandcupsoftea · 18/03/2025 20:32

Well they do, that's how I messaged from his mobile.

OP posts:
Haricots · 18/03/2025 20:33

cupsandcupsoftea · 18/03/2025 20:31

Hence I have it all on WhatsApp

So he was horrible on the app

you found / stalked his mobile

and then messaged him thereby giving this person your mobile number. The person who was a “bit horrible” on the app

ToKittyornottoKitty · 18/03/2025 20:33

cupsandcupsoftea · 18/03/2025 20:32

Well they do, that's how I messaged from his mobile.

Could you answer some of the other questions?

Haricots · 18/03/2025 20:34

cupsandcupsoftea · 18/03/2025 20:32

Well they do, that's how I messaged from his mobile.

Is that what you do when someone is horrible on an app.

give them your own mobile number?

op you’ve made a twit of yourself on this thread. We’ve saved you from doing that in RL

Original poster
cupsandcupsoftea · 18/03/2025 20:35

Yes, if it's okay for you for a guy to be awful then that's okay and disgustingly rude then send unsolicited nudes fine. Not by me.

OP posts:
Haricots · 18/03/2025 20:36

cupsandcupsoftea · 18/03/2025 20:35

Yes, if it's okay for you for a guy to be awful then that's okay and disgustingly rude then send unsolicited nudes fine. Not by me.

You go girl

explain to the journalist that someone was a “bit horrible” on a dating app

so you stalked their number
then messaged them thereby giving this person your number
whereupon the person who had been a “bit horrible” that you had pursued sent you a nudey