To think the past is being misrepresented on here?

[ChilliLips]

Not all the time obviously but didn’t want a waffly title.

I feel like lately I’m seeing a lot of posts describing a past I don’t recognise. Apparently schools used to be relaxed, have no rules, fewer demands. Whereas I’m sure I remember uniform inspections, SATS, end of year tests, mocks, weekly spelling tests at primary, Saturday detentions, and don’t forget the worst punishment of all - the CHAIR!

I have also seen a few posts saying conditions now are much worse resulting in poorer mental/physical health, hence a spike in disability. But again - can this be true? The world wars wounded, no antenatal tests, jobs like coal mining, loads of smoking/drinking, polio and measles… I’m sure there were a lot of people disabled with conditions they wouldn’t have now.

And finally that everyone was wealthy and lived in massive houses. Nobody I know who grew up in the 50s/60s have tales of luxury, I’ve heard all sorts of horrors including ice on the inside of windows, smog in the air, kids sleeping 4 to a room.

Particularly interested in answers from those alive then! I’m mid 30s.

@sashh

”The revision was up to us, and if you failed it wasn’t the teachers fault”.

So true.

Yes, I agree, these were the experiences of myself, and my school friends, but there have always been people better off than others. Note, my family did have a car, and we did do day trips and UK holidays, but that wasn't the norm, in my school year. All of my friends had a working (or 2) parent. We didn't consider ourselves to be poor by any means. I consider myself to have had a great childhood.
The 2 friends I had who didn't live in council houses and had foreign holidays, had both parents working, and their mothers were teachers.

Yes, people had it hard in the 50s, 60s and 70s. But have you got your house in the suburbs now? Can you afford several foreign holidays each year? Were you able to retire with years and years left to enjoy your retirement? Then you have got it better than many young people who can only dream of having these things one day. The comparison between now and 40+ years ago is futile. Living standards used to go up and now they are declining once again. It shouldn't be a race (back) to the bottom.

My partner and i were born a month apart in the 80s but had different experiences. Our parents were born within a few years of one another but have had different experiences. Our grandparents were born a few years apart but had different experiences.

My great grandparents were bordering on workhouse poor working in mills. They survived because of community support. They and my grandparents benefited massive from the introduction of the welfare state and council houses. Each generation from then had done slightly better than before.

The 90s were tough on my parents the high interest rates meant my mum returned to work 12 weeks after having me and 5 weeks after having my sister. My dad took an international job keeping him out of the country for 2-6 months at a time due to the cost of living at the time. I was raised by my grandparents and great grandparents and my parents worked continuously. We were lucky to get a holiday once a year. We didn't do any clubs outside school.
My mil had a career break until her youngest started school then went back to work school hours only. They had two holidays a year one in Europe. Clubs outside of school.
Our primary school experiences were similar. Shirt and tie uniforms expected to be able to tie a tie properly by year 1. Mine was more academic. I remember my year 2 SATs. We had spelling and arithmetic tests from year 2. Punishment for minor things was losing your break and having to stand outside the staff room. I think my school was stricter than my partners
Secondary schools were very different he had access to grammar schools. I went to a secondary school in a deprived area. In years 7 and 8 it was a shirt and tie uniform, strictly adhered too but then they switched to polo shirts and then they were a lot more flexible and didn't bother as much. Pretty much every lesson in the first 3 years for my education was disrupted by poor behaviour. It got better with more setted classes in GCSEs but still quite disruptive and disruptive students would be moved into the high set classes and disrupt them. More so the A level classes.

I do have my house. 2 bed that I bought in the '80s. I had so much difficulty making the payments at one point that I still have the original '70s floor covering in most of the house. Most of the furniture is second hand.

I kept telling myself that I'd get a replacement for the swirly orange carpet in the living room one of these days. I'm used to it now. Whoever buys the place for a song when they carry me out feet first can replace it.

I can't think of any of my acquaintances who can afford several foreign holidays a year.

Of course we don't want a race to the bottom - we expect life to improve for each generation. The point being made by many, I think, is that it's an illusion that previous generations had it easy, though my observation would be that people with a middle-class upbringing might have seen their parents having an easier time of it.

My schools (1989-2000) were way more relaxed than DCs (2008-now)

It's true that many of my generation are having a better retirement than our children might have but don't forget that many of us are also supporting our adult children financially eg contributing to house deposits, paying for grandchildren's clubs/music lessons etc. I know that not everyone my age is doing this but my friends and I are, so our disposable income is a lot less than it could be. I do worry about how they'll all manage later in life but at least they'll inherit property, which is something many of my generation didn't have.

Also mid-60's and I can associate with most of this, except for me it was the mill not the mine. I think what people fail to recognise that things were really neither better nor worse - they were different. For example....

I have also seen a few posts saying conditions now are much worse resulting in poorer mental/physical health, hence a spike in disability. But again - can this be true? The world wars wounded, no antenatal tests, jobs like coal mining, loads of smoking/drinking, polio and measles… I’m sure there were a lot of people disabled with conditions they wouldn’t have now.

There have been wars since WW2 - veterans are still suffering the impacts of military service. Perhaps not in the same numbers, but at least now combat stresses are recognised (still not enough done to help though) - in the past they suffered in silence for a lifetime if they hadn't been shot at the front for cowardice.

I live in a "mining village" (pit closed in 1990). If you want to see the impacts of mining and pit closures on a place, pop around any time - a massive number of people still struggle with industrial illnesses, and will for a few more decades. But now they are lucky - the get the illnesses associated with poverty and unemployment.

Smoking may have abated overall, but it is still common in poorer areas alongside an increase in vaping which we still don't know the effects of. Ditto drinking - still common. But now you have a much greater availability of illegal drugs.

Polio - ok, we have fortunately almost entirely eradicated that in my lifetime although that has put us at risk because vaccinations fall when people no longer recognise the threat. Ditto measles, which is increasing whilst vaccinations are falling.

But we also didn't have Covid or anything like it. The other thing people tend not to recognise is that what poverty means changes over time too. People talk about how sad it is that we need food banks, for example, and I agree it is - but we didn't have food banks, overdrafts, credit cards or any way of managing other than coping on what we had. For many of us, there was no expectation of colour tv (or any TV at all) - I was 5 before we could afford a B&W tv and 12 before we had a colour one. My parents got a phone when I was 17 simply so I could stay in touch when I went to university - most people would die now befoire giving up their screens, no matter what their income.

It is neither better nor worse, just different, and the "nostalgia" or "jealousy" about the past is often fuelled by ignorance about its realities.

Just adding, @EmmaMaria that uni is precisely why my mum made the decision to get a phone.

Yes I thought it was. When you are of an age you recognise certain "triggers" - my parents would never have got one had I not moved away.

Born the same year.
We were probably the last to get a TV.( mid 70s ) I’d have been one of those cramming to watch at a friends house 🤣. Maybe it was yours !
My parents only upgraded to a colour TV for Charles and Diana’s wedding 😆

Something else I forgot to mention - disability, especially learning disabilities or mental ill health, were often things to be ashamed of and they were often hidden away or "kept close in the local community". There were no benefits, and to an extent our level of benefits currently are recognition on how far we have travelled positively. I look forward to the Labour Party returning us to the good old times when disabled people had no support or help, lived in poverty (often with their families, and then were consigned to "homes" to see out what was left of their life when there was no longer anyone to care for them.

And for all their faults, back in those days we had a Labour Party, not a washed out version of the Tories masquerading as an alternative.

Anyone ever tried to watch snooker on a black and white TV…🥴

waves

I was born in 72 and whilst SATS didn’t exist when I was in primary school, we had homework, times table tests, spelling tests and end of term exams (Christmas and summer term only for the exams as those were the terms we got our reports)

I remember a snooker commentator saying something like "for those of you with black and white tvs, the pink ball is the one behind the red!" 🤣

My auntie had a video recorder and it was fun watching her fast forwarding and reversing Di toddling up and down the aisle. In retrospect don't we wish we could have fast reversed her on the actual day.

I remember that too. Df was watching, on our B/w.
Blue Peter used to annoy us too. They were always saying what wonderful colours!

Someone on here argued with me about my school experience in the 80s/90s. Everyone just generally behaved, there was very little bad behaviour and it was knocked on the head quickly.
It was a catholic school which all the parents had mostly been to and they were all still scared of the deputy head. The school was a real mix of people from council estates and very wealthy people from villages.
There was a lot of low level bullying though.
No one seemed to care that much about how well you were doing, I got good GCSEs doing very little work - I feel bad for DD as they are so much harder.

The 90s were great, town was great, going out was great and cheap. However I can also remember feeing bored out of my mind most of the time, extremely isolated from my friends as they lived miles away. You weren’t allowed to just sit on the phone. So in the holidays I didn’t see anyone for weeks. I wish I could go back and have a basic mobile then.

People expect things as a right of passage now. Everyone has a TV, a phone and a laptop/tablet as a right now. Even those I know who are struggling would see those as necessities. We didn’t have a TV growing up, or indeed se teal heating until I was a teen ( in the 80s). I remember being bitterly cold and ice on the windows. We never went abroad but that’s so much more accessible now, even the kids go through school and those that can’t afford it get it paid for by school. That was unheard of. I think we just expect more and are huge consumers these days. I also think every generation think it was better ‘ in the past’. It’s just rose tinted spectacles and definitely wasn’t!

I don’t think it’s true that kids just behaved at school in the 80s. Perhaps more so in primary but secondary schools seem way better.

Fighting was a regular occurrence between Secondary schools in my county the 80s (my school was unusual in not being that involved). Playground fights were pretty common along with pupil on pupil physical assault in the loos and occasionally in class. Classes might not have been so disrupted as “bad” kids tended to bunk off a lot more and schools engaged in a lot of unofficial exclusion. Plenty of kids didn’t do their homework, vandalized school property, smoked and disrupted class. They just got turfed out quicker to become someone else’s problem.

My brother became a teacher in the 90s and thinks behavior now, even post pandemic is better than when he started - which his colleagues at the time said was better than when they were first starting when kids would routinely swear at them and walk out.

Of course they only dream of having those things someday. You understand that most of the people who are retired now did not have retirement money saved when they were in their 20s, right? Most retired people scrimped and saved for many years to save enough to retire and they still don't have a house in the suburbs or funds for several trips each year.

@ThisUsernameIsNowTaken But have you got your house in the suburbs now? Can you afford several foreign holidays each year? Were you able to retire with years and years left to enjoy your retirement?

I was born in 1957. Where do I put in my complaint about the advantages that I haven't got?

BTW, most everywhere I look teenagers and early 20's are having foreign holidays. There's plenty of threads about them too. My parents / family never had a foreign holiday - they couldn't even afford UK holidays until I was a teenager and then it was a week camping. I didn't know a single person growing up who had foreign holidays, and I don't know any retired people who have several a year. Good luck to them if they can afford it but this is not the norm.

Everyone has a TV, a phone and a laptop/tablet as a right now. Even those I know who are struggling would see those as necessities.

Many people need a phone & laptop for education & jobs, why on earth wouldn't people have them vs a time they didn't exist?

No one argues it's entitled to expect antibiotics because there was a time they didn't exist.

1. house in suburbs - yes
2. foreign holidays - no
3. retirement. - not there yet, , but retirement age has been extended by seven years in my lifetime.

i also remember the playground fights in the 80s, and we’re not talking about an inner city deprived area, but a leafy posh ‘ Shire town.

in this same leafy town , my neighbour didn’t have a phone, and we’re talking late 70s/early 80 s. M