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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think the past is being misrepresented on here?

257 replies

ChilliLips · 13/03/2025 21:37

Not all the time obviously but didn’t want a waffly title.

I feel like lately I’m seeing a lot of posts describing a past I don’t recognise. Apparently schools used to be relaxed, have no rules, fewer demands. Whereas I’m sure I remember uniform inspections, SATS, end of year tests, mocks, weekly spelling tests at primary, Saturday detentions, and don’t forget the worst punishment of all - the CHAIR!

I have also seen a few posts saying conditions now are much worse resulting in poorer mental/physical health, hence a spike in disability. But again - can this be true? The world wars wounded, no antenatal tests, jobs like coal mining, loads of smoking/drinking, polio and measles… I’m sure there were a lot of people disabled with conditions they wouldn’t have now.

And finally that everyone was wealthy and lived in massive houses. Nobody I know who grew up in the 50s/60s have tales of luxury, I’ve heard all sorts of horrors including ice on the inside of windows, smog in the air, kids sleeping 4 to a room.

Particularly interested in answers from those alive then! I’m mid 30s.

OP posts:
wherearemypastnames · 16/03/2025 09:20

there are certainly attitude changes

from hope to fatalism and despair - you do know that most in the 1950s never thought they would own a home or have a holiday ? But they had hope of something better - now it’s all “I’ll never “

from all in it together and hard work to build a better life to screw any other group you can

from respect for others to me first

MargaretThursday · 16/03/2025 11:03

Crikeyalmighty · 16/03/2025 00:48

Good grief @EmmaMaria you should see my Facebook feed - im 63 but many of the mid to late 60 somethings and early 70 somethings I know through our business or personally are hardly in the UK - we are talking maybe 6 or 7 a year at a week to 10 days a time . Good on them but im
pretty sure a lot is funded because they’ve inherited or drawn down big lump sums on houses and pensions. And they are from all over- not all rich Home Counties types by any stretch of the imagination - it seems very common to me.

And I know no one in that situation at all, down in posh leafy Surrey or back home up north.
My (married in) great Aunt did live in France for the last 10 years of her life, but she was half French and came from the Channel Islands I think, so I don't think that counts.

I know a few of over 70s who do a couple of cruises a year. But if we're comparing like with like, they didn't do foreign holidays at all before they retired (one only had one holiday at all in 30 years) so people who are in their 30s complaining they can't afford to do holidays need to also realise that the people in their 70s didn't then. And who knows what the situation will be in 40 years time for them.

Shetlands · 16/03/2025 11:24

I also just remembered that my father's written consent was required for my mother's possible hysterectomy during an exploratory operation (1970 or 1971). I think it was because she was still of child bearing age.

Crikeyalmighty · 16/03/2025 12:22

@MargaretThursday yep I do think it’s a mixed picture but I genuinely know more like this than not - but i agree a lot started this level post 50 - I think part of this with younger people is the expectation of young families and 2 weeks all inclusive etc - even amongst families with not that much spare cash - you see it here on mumsnet regularly - we haven’t ever done 2 weeks anywhere, quite a lot of 8 and 9 day ones and 3 and 4 day breaks and we have no kids at home to consider.

quantumbutterfly · 16/03/2025 12:33

Shetlands · 16/03/2025 11:24

I also just remembered that my father's written consent was required for my mother's possible hysterectomy during an exploratory operation (1970 or 1971). I think it was because she was still of child bearing age.

Same here. Not a lot of bodily autonomy in those days for women. We take so much for granted.

lemontreeflowers · 17/03/2025 09:54

I was born mid 50's.

There were 5 of us in a 3 bed house. My brother and I, parents and grandfather who owned the house (he was a widower)
We had no central heating. In the winter there was ice on the windows.
On weekdays my dad got dressed by a 1 bar electric fire then went down and lit the coal fire in the back room. Later my mother got dressed and then brought the electric fire into my room while she went down, got my dad's breakfast and he went to work. After I got dressed I took the fire into my brother's room so he could get dressed. I don't know when my grandfather got up.

After I'd had breakfast I walked down the road and called on a girl who was a bit older than me and we walked to school together. At 3.30 my grandfather met us from school.

Monday was washday and we had a 'boiler' in the outhouse and all the sheets got boiled (with a 'bluebag') then put through a mangle before going out on the line. If it was bad weather we took them to a Chinese laundry about a mile away, in the pram.
The 'smalls' got washed in the kitchen sink. My mother used to scrub my dad's collars with a nailbrush and a big block of green soap.

When my mother was expecting my sister, we moved to a 4 bed house but still had no central heating, fridge, car or TV. I passed the 11+ to go to the local grammar school and was bought an old second-hand bike so I could bike there.

We had a bigger garden at the next house and my dad grew potatoes, cauli, beans and peas. He bought a coldframe and grew cucumbers and lettuce.

When I was 14 my mother got a job in a factory working the "twilight shift" (6-10pm)

When I was 15 I was told to get a Saturday job and I worked in a cake-shop. My mother took my first week's pay off me as 'lodge money'. I was earning 10/6d (about 50p in today's money)

When I was 16 my grandfather died and left us enough money to have partial central heating put in. It paid for a boiler and 4 radiators. (we still needed a paraffin stove to heat the hall and it didn't half pong !)
We also had enough money to rent a TV and buy a fridge.

My mother was a competent seamstress and made all my clothes. I also got hand-me-downs from other parents which she adjusted. I never went out apart from church because I was so embarrassed at not being fashionable.

At 18 I got a grant and went to Uni.
I still did my cakeshop job in the hols to help pay my way.

At 21 another grandparent died and left me £300, so I bought a mini that cost £250.

I got married in the 70's and the first house we bought cost £6,800. The mortgage was £68 a month which I paid because my husband didn't have a bank account, he got his money in a wage-packet and earned less than I did.
I was earning £120 a month and I did get a petrol allowance for running the car and a lunch allowance.

He went to work on his bike.

Inflation was running at 16% so we had nothing spare.

We set up home with old furniture donated to us. It was 3 years before got central heating put in. The kitchen had a belfast sink and a red formica topped table. We bought a reconditioned gas stove from the Gas Board.

IMO young people nowadays don't know they're born !

Gundogday · 17/03/2025 17:52

@lemontreeflowers i think more (young) need to read posts like this.

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