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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Lodger entering my room

153 replies

rockchic65 · 13/03/2025 12:01

Hi I've had a lodger for 2 months now and have caught him coming out of my bedroom his excuse was to check on my cat.my cats not well and he sleeps in my bedroom.my point is this is not the first time he been in my room and I have told him before it's my room please don't go in my room you don't have permission. The other day I came back from work and caught him coming out of my room again I was fuming and told him 1 more time and your out I have installed a camera today and I'm not telling him.if he did it again can I evict him same day or do I hsve to give him 28 days notice.i don't think he's all there. There was a time I was getting undressed and he poked his head around the door because he wasn't sure if I was in or not but my room is my privacy and he seems to forget what I told him

OP posts:
Doseofreality · 13/03/2025 13:50

You are being unreasonable not having all ready told him to leave, got legal advice and put a lick on your bedroom door.
Dis you check his references out?

rubberduck68 · 13/03/2025 13:50

Not okay, and kind of creepster vibes.

sidebirds · 13/03/2025 13:58

Ahsheeit · 13/03/2025 13:48

He needs to go, today, and I'd advise having someone with you when you tell him, who'll help supervise him packing and going. This guy can't be trusted in any way, shape or form. I'd also changed the locks once he's out. I'm pretty chill, but this bloke has weirdo written all over him.

⬆️ 100%

Change the locks when he is gone and do a sweep for hidden cameras

MrsTerryPratchett · 13/03/2025 14:01

Frankly, sometimes you don't check if it's legal. You do it and suffer any legal consequences.

Chuck him out with immediate effect.

'Forgets' my arse.

TallulahBetty · 13/03/2025 14:24

Thankfully, lodgers have very very few rights.

24 hours notice, get him out, change the locks. Do you have a male friend or relative that can be there when you tell him and when he leaves?

And do a thorough sweep of your room for cameras etc.

HomeTheatreSystem · 13/03/2025 14:32

EmpressaurusKitty · 13/03/2025 12:35

If I was the OP I’d be quite worried about giving him a long notice period. She’s got to spend that time sharing the house with him or leaving him alone in it.

Exactly this. He knows he's doing something wrong but keeps doing it regardless. For her personal safety and peace of mind he should be out immediately: if that makes him homeless that's his problem. He should have thought of that before persisting in behaviour that put his housing at risk.

LittleBigHead · 13/03/2025 14:34

Evict him. You can do so whenever you like, basically - he's crossed several boundaries so you are very much NOT unreasonable.

Molstraat · 13/03/2025 14:37

No waiting time.
Evict him today and gather his dhit together.
I would call 102 for advice.

I agree with others, he should have been gone the first time it happened.

He's a creep.
Get someone round to be there as you get him out.

HomeBodyClub · 13/03/2025 14:38

I would assume he is snooping through your stuff. Give him notice and have locks fitted asap.

FortyElephants · 13/03/2025 14:38

You have to give him 'reasonable' notice. But you've told him before not to go in your room so that's the notice. I would kick him out today.

MzHz · 13/03/2025 14:45

a lodger doesn't need notice at all, and tbh, with this level of disrespect, and invasion of privacy, you are well within the bounds of common sense to tell him to go today.

he has to go today, he needs to sleep somewhere else as of today and he can arrange to get his things collected within the week if need be, but he forfeits his key today. He has violated your trust

Bankholidayhelp · 13/03/2025 15:07

I'd be getting rid of him today.

WeeOrcadian · 13/03/2025 15:15

OP,.please look at getting him out ASAP

Everything you've described makes me feel queasy, get him OUT

Agapornis · 13/03/2025 15:49

You need to give a reasonable amount of notice, which normally means the length of the rental payment period. So if he pays weekly them you need to give a week's notice.

No, you can't kick him out immediately, unless it's something you could call the police for. Can you install a temporary lock?

Hope your cat feels better soon.

MemorableTrenchcoat · 13/03/2025 15:51

Where have you gone OP? Is this even real?

rockchic65 · 14/03/2025 14:44

Thankyou all for reply I have told him he's got till 10 am tomorrow morning to leave he didn't take it well but can't trust him anymore yes he's a creep I think I'll go without a lodger for a while thankyou all once again

OP posts:
HomeBodyClub · 14/03/2025 14:46

Hope he leaves without a fuss. Maybe change the locks and go a good sweep of the house.

rockchic65 · 14/03/2025 14:47

My cats been vets today he's got absess on his gum and is on antibiotics bless him he will be OK thankyou for asking about my cat

OP posts:
CowTown · 14/03/2025 14:47

And check for cameras in your bedroom—perhaps that’s what he was doing in there?

Delatron · 14/03/2025 15:09

Good work OP. When you say ‘didn’t take it well’ what do you mean?
Was he angry?

I’d be getting a friend over tonight or trying to get him out sooner.

EmpressaurusKitty · 14/03/2025 15:12

rockchic65 · 14/03/2025 14:44

Thankyou all for reply I have told him he's got till 10 am tomorrow morning to leave he didn't take it well but can't trust him anymore yes he's a creep I think I'll go without a lodger for a while thankyou all once again

Good for you, OP, and I’m glad your cat’s doing ok. Is there someone who can support you IRL?

Livpool · 14/03/2025 15:17

What a creep! Get rid asap

rockchic65 · 14/03/2025 15:35

I've got my knephew coming tonight to stay all weekend to make sure he's gone

OP posts:
RoastDinnerSmellsNice · 14/03/2025 15:41

Oh, that IS good news about your nephew coming to stay OP. I hope he leaves without any further problems. Did you check your bedroom for cameras?

Delatron · 14/03/2025 15:42

rockchic65 · 14/03/2025 15:35

I've got my knephew coming tonight to stay all weekend to make sure he's gone

Good news! Pleased you are getting rid and you have someone with you.