Too much ick?

[Stickyspringchicken]

Recently met a guy online, handsome, funny, self sufficient, respectful, the list goes on. But theres just one problem and i dont know if its just me. He finishes our phone calls with "bye kiss kiss" and i just die a little inside. He asks me to say it back and i just cant. Am i unreasonable not to finish our private conversations like this? Hes not really asking much i suppose.

It gets worse 😭

"Mentioned he would gag me and use a paddle to spank me and "kiss kiss" would be our safe word."

I was going to give a rather different reply but your spectacular drip feed put a whole new spin on it. Why didn't you mention the small matter of gagging, spanking and safe words in your OP? I mean, c'mon.

I remember a boyfriend a long time ago would say, ‘night night’ and ‘don’t let the bed bugs bite,’ when we finished phone calls at night. I know it’s something many people may say, but I hated it coming from a grown man.

Erm ... i was going to say the kiss kiss thing wouldn't bother me personally and ask have you actually met him yet? (you mention 'online' and phone calls).

But then we hear about the spanking / safe word stuff and .... no. It's ick central.

And 🤔😂at BloodyNine's post.

Calling from Albert Square there?

Just say it back to him in a really creepy "here's Johnny" voice.

And then say it to everyone when you're with him... like a total nut job.

My vagina would literally close up and die 😂

If you are gagged, how are you supposed to say a safe word?! 😁

I was thinking more along the lines of the Scott's Creek episode where Moira is trying to wangle a discount on a second hand car lol

Does he SAY 'kiss kiss' or make kissy noises?

Why am I asking, it doesn't matter, both are icky

If that's literally his only flaw I'd take him and run.

Lots of the people giving advice here have either decided to be bitter and single forevermore and no one will be good enough, or they're in relationships with partners who do far worse on a daily/hourly basis.

No one is perfect. I'd rather he say that than leave the toilet seat up or stamp on puppies.

I once lost total interest in a guy because of 1) the fact he called me sweetie but probably more 2) the way he said sweetie. Like very high pitched almost American “aww sweedie”. I’m not sure if it would have been better with the T but it just totally error messaged my feelings for him and I still feel bad because I just couldn’t explain what happened 😬

Read the OPs second post then come back

You might want to read the OP's other posts in the thread, such as the one where she reveals he wants to force her to say 'kiss kiss' by gagging her and beating her with a paddle.

Lots of the people giving advice here have either decided to be bitter and single forevermore and no one will be good enough, or they're in relationships with partners who do far worse on a daily/hourly basis

Or perhaps they just have enough standards to spot a red flag and to know the difference between a mildly annoying habit and something that is odd and controlling.

Bye, kiss, kiss? How I'll old is this guy, 13? As for the hanky spanky, you do you but do NOT use kiss, kiss as your safe word.

Ok at this point I’d be out.

The fact that he has had fantasies about using it as a safe work for kinky sex shows he’s getting a little thrill out if it when he says it on the phone and that’s why he’s pressing you to say it back.

Crying with laughter here 🤣 🤣 🤣

After reading all your replies i decided to have a chat with him about it all. He said he was only joking and it was supposed to be light hearted banter. Ive arrived home to a parcel containing a fluffy tail butt plug which i assume is from him. Not sure if that can be taken as banter?

You've jumped the shark there OP. No woman on earth thinks that's 'banter'.

Oh now that is vile!

Bloody hell that escalated.

I would suggest to him that he puts that in his, then you won't have to listen to him talking out of his arse: "Light hearted banter." He's a gaslighter, and a knob. Throw him back.

🙄

did he aye?

Yeah blocked.

This guy is weird. Just dumb him. Yack!