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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

He didn’t go to Tesco?

678 replies

purpleparroty · 07/03/2025 20:26

I’ve been ill with the flu for the past few days and am in the worst of it, asked DH if he could pop to the shops and get some dinner in, and food for dc over the weekend, as we have nothing in and I thought he would stop at Tesco on his way home from work.

He decided to go to our village newsagents which sells no fresh food and spent 50 FUCKING QUID on crap. He got unbranded frozen ready meals which no one in our house would touch with a barge pole. The rest went on crisps / chocolate / ice cream / pot noodles. He didn’t even get bread (which they actually sell). Because i’ve not been happy about this he’s now gone in a mood and said he’s not bothering again. AIBU to be psised off he didn’t go to tesco and get real food the kids actually eat and not just chocolate and crisps. And now he’s moaning saying he didn’t know he wasn’t ‘allowed’ to go to the village shop and that i should have told him. I shouldn’t fucking have to tell people to use their brain.

OP posts:
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ZebedeeDougalFlorence · 07/03/2025 21:33

purpleparroty · 07/03/2025 20:31

Didn’t mean branded like that… come on now..

Ignore it. The rest of us know what you mean.

TeaNtoast25 · 07/03/2025 21:33

hazelnutvanillalatte · 07/03/2025 21:32

Seriously, the attitudes on this thread are shocking. My primary school aged child would know broadly what to get in a food shop for a couple days, and that we wouldn't be filling a basket up with £50 of crisps and sweets.

I bet they would fill there basket with sweets and crisps tho

diddl · 07/03/2025 21:33

Tbh I think it is "quite big in the scheme of things" if there's £50 been spent but no actual food to eat.

Yalta · 07/03/2025 21:33

loveforautumn · 07/03/2025 20:34

Oh stop! The poor bloke went to the shop and got what he thought would be ok, he tried. The kids won't starve and you haven't had to go shopping. I don't see the problem.

Interested to know why it would be ok if it isn’t what is normally eaten

Surely when he was looking at the prices he thought they were steep

Where was his brain when he thought about putting meals together

Even ready meals you eat with vegetables and bread is pretty much a standard for breakfast or lunch

Is he trying to be a Disney Dad and thinking he can score points against you by plying his dc with chocolate and sweets

TeaNtoast25 · 07/03/2025 21:34

Yalta · 07/03/2025 21:33

Interested to know why it would be ok if it isn’t what is normally eaten

Surely when he was looking at the prices he thought they were steep

Where was his brain when he thought about putting meals together

Even ready meals you eat with vegetables and bread is pretty much a standard for breakfast or lunch

Is he trying to be a Disney Dad and thinking he can score points against you by plying his dc with chocolate and sweets

Disney dad lmaoooooooo

diddl · 07/03/2025 21:35

I don't "the poor bloke tried".

No he didn't-not at all!

SwanSong1 · 07/03/2025 21:36

Go yourself next time instead of moaning, and your kids get what they are given or they can do without.

mindutopia · 07/03/2025 21:36

Our village shop sells absolute shite. I know exactly what you mean by non-branded food. It’s all random tins of junk that you might eat on DofE if you were really desperately hungry. And stale biscuits. And some dodgy powdered custard. Plus sweets and chocolate and crisps. And then oddly, they sell things like frozen grouse at £18 each. I could put together a meal from there if truly starving and we all would live. But no one would be happy about it.

But I suspect if your Dh was ill and just wanted some decent food, he’d be disappointed if you came home with junk from the village shop and no nice food. He can deal with feeding dc from the random junk they won’t eat all weekend and he can go get you something from a proper shop tomorrow while he eats his way through the pot noodles.

Overhaul54 · 07/03/2025 21:36

I would be livid. My DH does similar but I’d be cross because he’s got £50 to spunk and I haven’t. I hate him spending £9.50 on Charlie Bingham when you can get a 3 course meal deal with wine for £3 more.

The dynamic is weird here. Why isn’t he worried about the kids eating shite? Does he like frozen meals himself? Why did he chose the rural corner shop not Tesco - he must know the choice is limited there.
Did he just think proper food is coming in a day and a half so I don’t need to worry?

stresssd · 07/03/2025 21:37

I'd be furious too op. Why are men held to such low standards. Of course he should have went to a supermarket for 3 days shopping. Unfortunately you have an extra child in your house to manage it would seem.

Oftenaddled · 07/03/2025 21:37

I've eaten plenty of corner shop ready meals. They're all right. If your children are old enough to decide they won't touch them with a barge pole, sounds like they are old enough to do their own shopping.

Soitwillbefine · 07/03/2025 21:37

Moonnstars · 07/03/2025 20:33

Could you not do an online shop?

Seriously?! Are we setting the bar that low?

Shopping partner/parent is ill and non-shopping partner/parent can’t fill a basket with the usual food to last a couple of days?!

I get that most families divvy up roles and responsibilities but I like to think I could step up when needed!

plominoagain · 07/03/2025 21:37

I do 90 per cent of the shopping in our house , because I don’t mind it and it’s easier .

However , the DH is also perfectly capable and has been known to complete a weeks food shop with success, because he’s not a fucking idiot and is able to actually engage that lofty man brain with the menial task of trawling some aisles in an actual supermarket.

Jesus fucking Christ . Endearing? What the fuck is endearing about a grown man being so completely fucking useless ?

SwerveCity · 07/03/2025 21:40

A grown man should be able to go to the supermarket and buy appropriate food for his kids. Not a bunch of expensive junk that no one will eat. No he didn’t try. No wonder some blokes think they can get away with being so shit when people just make excuses for them.

purpleparroty · 07/03/2025 21:40

Redpeach · 07/03/2025 21:32

Surely the person who did the online shop for the week is also incompetent, by that standard?

The fresh stuff doesn’t last the whole week, hence why we do top up shops every Thursday / Friday and a big shop on Sunday for packed lunches..

OP posts:
Gumptionesque · 07/03/2025 21:41

I feel for you OP. In similar circumstances DH has been know to blow £50 on one very delicious meal from M&S, but not a single household staple for the rest of the weekend. He definitely has the intellect to budget and menu plan, but chooses not to, it’s infuriating.

ItGhoul · 07/03/2025 21:41

If my partner got as angry as the OP over something as trivial as a few corner shop ready meals, I’d be packing my bags and leaving him.

The kids aren’t going to die from eating microwave lasagne for a couple of days. This is such a huge fuss over nothing.

CalicoPusscat · 07/03/2025 21:41

SwanSong1 · 07/03/2025 21:36

Go yourself next time instead of moaning, and your kids get what they are given or they can do without.

She's got the flu

TeaNtoast25 · 07/03/2025 21:41

purpleparroty · 07/03/2025 21:40

The fresh stuff doesn’t last the whole week, hence why we do top up shops every Thursday / Friday and a big shop on Sunday for packed lunches..

What have your kids said about all the junk are they fuming and livid or are they happy about it, beings your I’ll you can’t eat anyways

Yourethebeerthief · 07/03/2025 21:42

My cousin's dad was like this growing up. He only got his shopping in from the local Spar type shop. When she stayed at his on a weekend he would make pasta for dinner that was out of one of those packets. You cook them on the hob and stir a knob of butter in them. Either that or literally a pot noodle.

Couldn't even manage to make her egg on toast with beans or something like that.

Some men are truly pathetic.

diddl · 07/03/2025 21:42

I know it often falls on the woman to meal plan/shop/cook.

But then does it completely pass some men by?

Do they never suggest meals or have any idea what the ingredients are?

Have they never put food shopping away or seen a meal being cooked?

TeaNtoast25 · 07/03/2025 21:43

Yourethebeerthief · 07/03/2025 21:42

My cousin's dad was like this growing up. He only got his shopping in from the local Spar type shop. When she stayed at his on a weekend he would make pasta for dinner that was out of one of those packets. You cook them on the hob and stir a knob of butter in them. Either that or literally a pot noodle.

Couldn't even manage to make her egg on toast with beans or something like that.

Some men are truly pathetic.

Oh no did your cousin survive to tell the tale xx

Lentilweaver · 07/03/2025 21:44

ItGhoul · 07/03/2025 21:41

If my partner got as angry as the OP over something as trivial as a few corner shop ready meals, I’d be packing my bags and leaving him.

The kids aren’t going to die from eating microwave lasagne for a couple of days. This is such a huge fuss over nothing.

Its not about the corner shop ready meals. Its about being so up your own arse that you dont know what your own kids eat
It's about not sharing the mental load and leaving it to your wife to buy eggs because thar's womens work

Regretsmorethanafew · 07/03/2025 21:44

richardosmanstrousers · 07/03/2025 20:30

You are being ridiculous. He did what you asked.

He very obviously did not.

ItGhoul · 07/03/2025 21:45

Why isn’t he worried about the kids eating shite?

Probably because he’s sufficiently rational to comprehend that eating ‘shite’ for a few days isn’t going to do them even a modicum of harm.