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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

California not Sussex

451 replies

CaliforniaNotSussex · 06/03/2025 13:28

I was born and grew up on the Surrey Sussex border. My brother currently lives in Sussex, my mum spent her retirement in Sussex, my grandparents lived in Sussex their whole lives, I had Saturday and holiday jobs in Sussex, my friends at school lived in Sussex.

I do not like or agree with Ms Markle having the 'Duchess of Sussex' title. She has spent all of 6 hours of her entire life here. She doesn't represent or care about me and the rest of the population of Sussex. She doesn't even like the UK. She will probably never set foot in the UK again, she hates our royal family and our country.

I cant really do much about the title being given to her. But now she wants people to refer to her as 'Meghan Sussex' according to her new netflix show.

Why?????

Why Meghan do you want you and your family to have a surname of a place you have barely ever been to, know nothing about, and which is located in a country you dislike and will never return to?

Can't you call yourself Meghan California instead? You can call yourself anything informally, and if you want to change your name formally, there is probably a way that you and Harry and the kids could adopt 'California' as your new surname.

Why oh why take/steal our home county as your new name. I get the 'duchess of Sussex' title is given to you, but you don't need to use it, and you definitely don't need to call yourself 'Meghan Sussex'.

(Some of) The people of Sussex do not want you to have our name

If you want our name then come visit. Spend time here. Visit the locals, buy OUR jam, invest in OUR schools, donate money to local charities, show interest in the place you have adopted as yours. Visit us regularly. Learn about the culture, the people, the place.

AIBU for thinking Meghan should make the effort to get to know Sussex if she now wants to be called 'Meghan Sussex'? If she doesn't want anything to do with us and will never come here again, she shouldn't call herself 'Meghan Sussex'.

OP posts:
wholettheturnipsburn · 06/03/2025 14:26

I don't even know where Sussex is, let alone care

What a weird thing to be bothered about.

tilypu · 06/03/2025 14:27

People would do well to think about why she might have decided she didn't want to be in the UK any longer... Maybe because of the constant negativity that she was subjected to.

I suspect some people must hate that Harry is still a prince and is still in line for the throne 😂

Isthiswhatmenthink · 06/03/2025 14:27

CaliforniaNotSussex · 06/03/2025 13:28

I was born and grew up on the Surrey Sussex border. My brother currently lives in Sussex, my mum spent her retirement in Sussex, my grandparents lived in Sussex their whole lives, I had Saturday and holiday jobs in Sussex, my friends at school lived in Sussex.

I do not like or agree with Ms Markle having the 'Duchess of Sussex' title. She has spent all of 6 hours of her entire life here. She doesn't represent or care about me and the rest of the population of Sussex. She doesn't even like the UK. She will probably never set foot in the UK again, she hates our royal family and our country.

I cant really do much about the title being given to her. But now she wants people to refer to her as 'Meghan Sussex' according to her new netflix show.

Why?????

Why Meghan do you want you and your family to have a surname of a place you have barely ever been to, know nothing about, and which is located in a country you dislike and will never return to?

Can't you call yourself Meghan California instead? You can call yourself anything informally, and if you want to change your name formally, there is probably a way that you and Harry and the kids could adopt 'California' as your new surname.

Why oh why take/steal our home county as your new name. I get the 'duchess of Sussex' title is given to you, but you don't need to use it, and you definitely don't need to call yourself 'Meghan Sussex'.

(Some of) The people of Sussex do not want you to have our name

If you want our name then come visit. Spend time here. Visit the locals, buy OUR jam, invest in OUR schools, donate money to local charities, show interest in the place you have adopted as yours. Visit us regularly. Learn about the culture, the people, the place.

AIBU for thinking Meghan should make the effort to get to know Sussex if she now wants to be called 'Meghan Sussex'? If she doesn't want anything to do with us and will never come here again, she shouldn't call herself 'Meghan Sussex'.

Really curious about this ‘Sussex Culture’…

KitsyWitsy · 06/03/2025 14:28

The other royals with place names at least live in the UK and aren't raging narcs that are constantly all over the media hawking bloody jam and pancake mix. How far she has fallen.

lemmein · 06/03/2025 14:28

KitsyWitsy · 06/03/2025 14:28

The other royals with place names at least live in the UK and aren't raging narcs that are constantly all over the media hawking bloody jam and pancake mix. How far she has fallen.

Seriously, why do you care?

Coffeeishot · 06/03/2025 14:29

MaggieBsBoat · 06/03/2025 14:25

This!
She clearly doesn’t even know her own name (if indeed she did take that name).

I feel the same way about the Duke and Duchess of Edinburgh OP. Bastards!

What are you on about that isnt their name you don't like Edward and Sophie what did they do ?

I swear people just come on to these threads and type the first thing to fall out of their brain.

Mizztikle · 06/03/2025 14:29

CaliforniaNotSussex · 06/03/2025 14:06

She did a horrible curtsey thing in front of the world which was a direct piss take of the queen and our country's traditions. That was her. I saw it. No excuses. She was rude and disrespectful.

Oh wow you should have said, I'm appalled she would do a horrible courtesy! I'm surprised the didn't send her to the tower😱

whathaveiforgotten · 06/03/2025 14:30

If she did experience racism that's awful. But I have my doubts

Just going back to this statement OP. It's bonkers.

"If" she did experience racism?

Even if you don't think there was a racist foundation to much of the media coverage around her at certain points, you're suggesting she might not have experienced racism at all?

I mean... that's crazy. There were countless social media posts from people being openly racist about her. And even if there hadn't been, she is a mixed race woman. I don't know a single mixed race or black woman who has never experienced racism, let alone a famous mixed race or black woman.

It's really, really odd to have said you 'have your doubts' that she experienced racism at all.

FruitPolos · 06/03/2025 14:31

This reply has been deleted

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SL2924 · 06/03/2025 14:31

She doesn’t hate the uk. The uk press were (and still are) absolute racist bastards to her. So why would she live here?

It doesn’t matter if she has or hasn’t been to Sussex. Should everyone with a place name as a surname have to spend time there? That is utterly ridiculous.

Get over yourself.

ForeveraBluebird · 06/03/2025 14:31

I don’t mind what name she uses, I did feel sorry for the poor woman who referred to her as Markle though. She looked like she wanted to hide in a hole .

KitsyWitsy · 06/03/2025 14:32

lemmein · 06/03/2025 14:28

Seriously, why do you care?

Why shouldn't I take an interest? She's part of my country's royal family now and has treated the whole institution like shit while clinging on for dear life to the titles... I also find them both interesting from a psychological perspective. She's a fascinating study.

Blueblell · 06/03/2025 14:32

Well I don’t blame her for wanting and using the same surname as her children. However I do wonder why (well not really) she insists on using her full title. I know it is her title but given her attitude to the UK surely she should just quietly not use it. I noticed it was in full in the credits of her show.

CaliforniaNotSussex · 06/03/2025 14:33

Blueblell · 06/03/2025 14:32

Well I don’t blame her for wanting and using the same surname as her children. However I do wonder why (well not really) she insists on using her full title. I know it is her title but given her attitude to the UK surely she should just quietly not use it. I noticed it was in full in the credits of her show.

Exactly

OP posts:
ZookeeperSE · 06/03/2025 14:35

Don't, whatever you do, move to York then...

Sayitagainmyl · 06/03/2025 14:36

Justine Roberts, MN’s founder, was absolutely correct when she labelled these Meghan SUSSEX obsessors as ‘deranged’. OP, if you want to find like-minded individuals, who also have far too much free time, please go over to the royal family forum.
I'm honestly embarrassed for you.

Americano75 · 06/03/2025 14:36

God, it's like the Daily Mail threw up in here.

Devonshiregal · 06/03/2025 14:36

RhiWrites · 06/03/2025 13:40

She was the target of racial abuse that made her suicidal. She doesn’t hate the UK, the Queen (any Queen) or fucking Sussex. But she was made to feel so unwelcome she couldn’t bear to stay here.

Maybe instead of writing hateful posts and “why oh why oh why” moaning you could write to her and suggest some great Sussex businesses she might like to support. She might actually do it. If you’re nice to her instead of whatever this is.

She was rude, lied on National tv and absolutely everyone except her mother cuts ties with her. She lectures the world on how they should be while doing the opposite. She tells the rest of us not to take a plane on our shitty European holiday once every two years whilst flying back and forth for multiple baby showers (while not being allowed out of the tower because they took her passport?). He makes shit up like how he had no idea how to get her help because he didn’t know anything about mental health problems…you know, being the ambassador of several mental health charities and promoting mental health recovery for veterans…??? They complain about the size of house they’re given for free (paid for by us) and the wedding they got for free (paid for by us). She is not liked because she is unlikeable. Not because of her skin colour. I seem to remember Princess Diana having it harder - Harry himself says she had it the worst yet somehow says it’s because of race? It’s because the newspapers here are scum. The rest of us aren’t. The rest of us don’t like her because she’s got delusions of grandeur and accuees people off racism when she’s actually just not nice.

iwentjasonwaterfalls · 06/03/2025 14:36

I would love for my life to be so simple and peaceful that I could care about something like this.

Snoken · 06/03/2025 14:37

PinkArt · 06/03/2025 14:20

It's not light hearted to say you don't believe someone was suicidal or that they experienced racism though, is it? Would you do that on your debatable sounding work with people with MH issues? 'I feel deeply for you if you feel that way. I don't actually believe you though'.
Its not light hearted to take to your keyboard for a spate of vile ranting about a woman you don't know, because the name she acquired on marriage happens to be the same as the place you live. It's quite the opposite of light hearted. It comes from a deeply nasty place.

It's even worse than that, OP doesn't even live in Sussex and she never has, she lives in Surrey. She still thinks she should have a say in who can have the surname for some reason.

skullbabe · 06/03/2025 14:37

Oh no! Mother wants the same name as her children - how very dare she! 🙄

tilypu · 06/03/2025 14:37

Blueblell · 06/03/2025 14:32

Well I don’t blame her for wanting and using the same surname as her children. However I do wonder why (well not really) she insists on using her full title. I know it is her title but given her attitude to the UK surely she should just quietly not use it. I noticed it was in full in the credits of her show.

Was it her decision to have the full title in the credits?

I'm not saying it wasn't, but I'm pretty sure that you don't know the answer to that either - so why present it as fact?

CaliforniaNotSussex · 06/03/2025 14:38

ZookeeperSE · 06/03/2025 14:35

Don't, whatever you do, move to York then...

🤣🤣🤣

OP posts:
MillyVannily · 06/03/2025 14:38

Oh God not another Megan thread.

Kahless · 06/03/2025 14:40

floopsycat · 06/03/2025 13:32

What is Sussex culture? I'm from there and can't think of many distinguishing features from the rest of the south England counties.

We won't be druv

We wunt be druv" is the unofficial county motto of Sussex in southern England.It is a Sussex dialect phrase meaning "we will not be driven". The motto asserts that people from the English county of Sussex have minds of their own, and cannot be forced against their will or told what to do. It is used as a motto of the people of Sussex and the Sussex Bonfire Societies. (Wiki)

Edit: to answer the op. I don't really care what someone calls themselves

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